RESUME
"Master, I am not sure either what is happening to you and what you did before is okay you don't need to apologize."
"Ah, Even you don't know."
"But if I have to guess based on what's happening to you I'll say that it's because of trauma every time you lose control it happens when something bad happens.
"Oh, it's because of that okay, Thanks" Is that really why?
A day has passed since then and today all things went back to normal. And it's been 2 months since we arrived and we still don't know why we are sent here. Bite and the others said that they were sent here to get help by a god but 5000 have passed and nothing changed for them.
When we patched up the hole and covered the walls again, we used tungsten that I bought from the limited shop and converted some rocks to tungsten using Aqeka's special ability.
Because of that time, I changed my class again without knowing but this time I only forgot the skills but the knowledge about alchemy remained. Since I only get 1 skill about alchemy and the others are the skills I manually learned those skills remained.
Berserker is really a good class but there is a huge drawback every time I uses the passive skill I lose sanity and control. If I continue being a berserker I will lose myself.
Bang Bang Bang
"Come in."
"Master, we found another dungeon but there is no entrance." Ore said
"No entrance? Have you guys tried digging around it?"
"Yes of course. The dungeon is a blue giant cube and each side is has 81 little cubes with line patterns."
"That sounds like a Rubik's cube."
"You know what it is Master?"
"Yeah, Let's bring the others too they probably know Rubik's cube too."
We walked through the tunnel for about 10 minutes after arriving. I didn't know that they had already dug so far.
"Yep, This is a Rubik's cube dungeon alright," Heptasis said.
"Are we supposed to solve this to enter?" Cladia said.
"Yes!"
"How though?" Heptasis asked. All of us are more confused thinking about how we gonna move this.
"Try using mana to manipulate the dungeon." Train said. We did what he said and it worked but it consumes a lot of mana and to slow to move. Now are next problem is how we gonna solve the rubik's cube.
"Yes! It worked!" Heptasis said while he clinch his hand and jumped.
"Don't celebrate yet, we still don't know how to solve it." Train said. "Ahh, They celebrate to early." He thought.
"I think I can solve it." Said So Yeong. Oh right, this guy I forgot about him, he is always quiet.
"Really!? That's good then."
"I used to play rubik's cube when I was a child. I don't have friends at the orphanage so I'm always alone playing the cube but I only have a 3 by 3 and that was a long time ago, I can't promise that I can solve it but I'll try."
"Oh, It's okay if you can't solve it." He's an orphan and he doesn't have any friends growing up? That explains why he is always quiet.
I asked some of my tames to give some of their mana to So Yeong to help him. We can't always use potions and to make potions we need at least one mana stone to make a small potion. The language scroll we started to make yesterday is already increased a lot I didn't expect this to be this fast.
We don't gain anything by clearing a dungeon but we enter it to gain information from the monsters inside. If only we know why we are here we wouldn't enter a dungeon the gold we gain doesn't help us in this place where money doesn't matter.
It's a waste that I didn't appraise the dragon scale and dendrite before my class changed I still don't know their uses. For the time being, I stopped doing experiments to gain pain because I'm still not sure if I want to change my class and even if I do I still don't know if the requirements will be doable.
While So Yeong was solving the rubik's dungeon and the others completing the scroll, I am practising alchemy. I may not have the appraisal skill but I still have the knowledge of alchemy because I was learning the skills manually.
Ore's team continued their mining to find dungeons while Fool teaches the magicians spells they can learn and Bite on the other hand requested that he wanted me to make him the leader of the expedition team. He said that out of 3 of them he is always left out and has nothing to do.
I do feel bad for him, he thought of himself as a burden so I accepted his request and the Sed, Stature, and Cladia said they also want to go up to gain exp so I also send them with Bite and others who wanted to be on the expedition. And Aqeka converts C grade stones to Mythril that Metal found from Ore's mining team.
"Fool!"
"Oh, Master, is there something you need?" "That's all I can teach today." Fool said to his students.
"You said that I lose control because of my trauma right?"
"Indeed, but that is only my guess."
"Do you have any idea how I can heal from trauma?"
"I'm sorry, Master I can't help you with that."
"Ah, I see, Thanks."
"I already promised myself to change why can't I change? Is it because they are not here that I won't change?" I muttered
"I don't know what your trauma is but if you want to change, heal yourself first overcome that trauma. How can you change yourself when you can't even leave your trauma in the past."
"Huh?" I said as I turned my head to the voice it was just Cladia. "She heard me?" I thought to myself.
"Everyone has something bad happen to them in the past that they want to keep to themselves. But if it's something that happen a long time ago and can't fix alone that is when you know that you need to share that experience with someone to be healed."
"What are you saying?"
"Ah, You're so slow. You have all of us here!" And then She left after saying all of that.
Now that I think about it, I've been dealing with all this alone. I did ask my Mom for help before and we thought I already changed but we were wrong.
I thought about what she said and now I am on my way to them. I knock on the door of Train's smithy where all of them hang out and the door opened, all of them are there including Ore and the others.
All of them greeted me with a smile. "I need help." As I looked at them, I said "Sure!" in a concerned tone.
I told them everything I went through for hours, including my meeting with Hanse. They understand what I went through and why I was hesitant on telling them about my knowledge of this world. I don't regret sharing my trauma with them and it helped me a bit and clear some of my thoughts.
After telling them about my trauma they also shared theirs. Train was a 75-year-old world war 3 veteran and a few years after the war was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer the doctors said that he had only less than 10 months left, and this game gave him another chance of life to enjoy that was taken from him because of the world war.
So Yeong became an orphan at 3 years old when his parents died in the war. He was adopted at 9 years old and was raised well by his adopted parents. So Yeong is a College student and growing his only friend is Cladia.
Cladia is the only friend So Yeong has because of her extroverted personality. For So Yeong, he viewed Cladia as an older sister. At 17 years old Cladia's Step Father raped her but she managed to grab a pen and stab him in the eye.
She told her mother what her Step Father did but instead of being concerned about her, She was mad at Cladia for stabbing Him. Her mother did not believe what Cladia said because of that he ran away from home and asked So Yeong for help.
That's when Cladia started living with So Yeong's family.
Heptasis or Sed went to the same school as Se Yeong and Cladia and they became classmates and eventually friends. Sed is an Otaku and also knows the story of both of them. Like Train whom they meet in an online game, They meet Stature in an Anime Con that Sed went to. Like Sed Stature is also obsessed with anime-related stuff. And Stature was also a former professional player of a game that they always play.
After we told all our story I realized that my trauma is not as bad as Cladia's even her own mother didn't believe what she said which must be hard for her.
"Wait, here Pon there is something I will give to you." Train said and went to the back. After returning he brought out a club.
"Here!"
"What's this?" I asked.
"A club! Stature asked me to make you a heavy weapon, I was originally planning to make you a hammer but I made a mace instead to give it more range and destructiveness."
"Why did you ask Train to make me a weapon, you know that I use a sword?"
"Yeah you use a sword but when I saw you kill the monsters you didn't slash them with the blade, you wacked them with the blade and hilt of the sword. So I asked Train to make you a weapon that will suit your fighting style if you fight with that next time there will be a bloodbath hyahahaha!!" Stature said as he imitate what I did.
"I whacked them?"
"Yeah, You're like maniac when you fight, you even pulled their limbs you're scary to fight, Man!."
Did the berserker make me fight like that because of boxing? Fighting like that make sense because of the similarities I can't use my fist because of the strength of the monsters so I used the sword to make a blow? Ah, so many questions on my head right now, Let's just ignore it for now.
"Anyway, Thanks!"
"Oh, also forgot to ask, you guys left, for the expedition why did you return already?"
"We found a dungeon inside a cave and after that, we got a ton of exp for clearing it first and we're given a requirement." Heptasis Said.
"Oh, What's your requirement?"
"For me, I need to drink poison. Trash requirement but I can't do nothing about it."Heptasis said with a disgusted face.
"I need to kill 10 boss monsters alone. Thank God I don't need to fight them at the same time so I just have to kill the monster from outside."
"It's late already and you guys came from a dungeon I'll leave now you guys take a rest and thank you for listening to me."
"Anytime!"
What a tiring day. I lie down and went to sleep. The next day I woke up again to another monster attack but this time thankfully only few monsters came and they all managed to fiend them off.
"Why didn't you wake me up." Asked Fool.
And he said "There is no need for you to fight when only few and weak ones came and you look like you are having a good dream and plus there is no death this time. And if I wake you up, you might lose control again Master."
"Thanks for your concern, but next time please wake me up." Sigh
My gut is telling me that this will be something that will be normal.
PAUSE