When I woke up. I forgot that Freedom and I fell asleep snuggling XD.
We left the hotel around 8 am to take the "Outback Safari". We say hi to the tour guide, his name is Jim. We start driving to the first destination, the watering hole. This bus we're in sprays bunny repellent like crazy, so I guess the long drive works. On the way to the hole, I'll just tell y'all a bit more about me and Freedom's relationship...
I never mention it because it's not really important, but Freedom has severe anger issues. The only reason that's not important is because I can cool anyone down by just letting her yell at me pissed off, then give her a hug and say "Even if I think I'm right, I could have handled what made you mad better. I'm sorry." Freedom says that's one of the things she loves about me. She even calls me a human fire extinguisher. MY NAME IS ELECTRIC, I'M SUPPOSED TO CAUSE FIRES. But I don't because I don't wanna bother fighting if it can be avoided.
"Look at those emus! H-hey can you pump up the gas dude? One is coming at us! IT'S PISSED! PUMP ON THE GAS YOU IDIOT!" Freedom starts panicking, I don't blame her, emus have won a war against humans before:
only in the land down under, Australia could this happen.
"(insert many many dirty words here that need to be censored, 5 of which starting with the letter 'F')!" The tour guide got yanked out of the bus since his door was an open door...
What an actual idiot, man needs a door.
Us and the 2 other people that were on the bus went outside the bus to see what we could do....
And of course, my feisty, lovely girlfriend wants to wrestle the emu.
"If you die I'm dead. So why don't we try together before they trample our tour guide to death?" I ask Freedom.
The other people on the tour (they are from England) when they met us on the bus played "America Heck Yeah!" y'know the song that made us a meme.
Well guess what, when we started charging at it...
"AMERICA! HECK YEAH!" Then the really memey guitar solo comes in.
We grabbed it's neck after the tackle so the driver could get out. He was in no shape to drive but we needed him for directions. The outback still has no wifi nor Q-mobile towers, that's why we saved him. We literally would all die if we didn't try.
We got him and drove him back while he gave us directions. He gave us each a souvenir jacket and hat that normally he sells at the end of the tour for free as compensation for not completing the tour. He also treated all four of us to dinner...
It's rotisserie rabbit, I KNOW more rabbit.
"Y'know I really wanted to wrestle a crocodile in the water hole." Freedom told me.
Jim overheard what she said and out of the blue during dinner...
"Hey, I have three pet crocs, if you want to wrestle some before you go I'll teach you how to put a muzzle on one." Jim said.
At least one of her wishes came true about this trip. She REALLY wanted to wrestle a crocodile.
He has one croc that's really tame so he trained her with that. Then the medium one was a little feistier, she was able to get it on him with a roll of her own. The biggest one of the bunch was the feistiest one of them all, it took her a bit off tossing and turning but she got the muzzle on that honker of a croc after about 5 minutes.
After that, the dude gave us some vodka.
I don't know how people drink that crap.
After dinner we went back to the hotel and just downed the last 4 cans of wine between the two of us. We bought a kangaroo burger to split so we wouldn't go past buzzing.
We fell asleep on the same bed just straight up hugging and nothing else XD. We are really trying to enjoy our week XD.
The next morning...