"How can you tell me not to cry?" I respond, my voice breaking. "How can I not worry about you?"
"It's not that I don't like it when you worry about me." She smiles, but her eyes don't meet mine. "And I don't pretend that I'm perfectly normal like everyone else. But you're thinking that because of our future, right?"
"Yes." As if I'm actually her little brother. I hang my head down acting as if I've disappointed her. It's all true. We don't have a lot of time left together. In a couple years, she'll be off to college. Like after that, we'll all eventually drift apart.
"I guess there's nothing wrong with being a little scared." Juria pushes me towards the wall of someone's house. She looks back and forth to see if anyone can check in on our private conversation. "I won't lie to you. I don't think there's any boys interested in me right now. You only want me to be happy, but it's not that simple."
"But if they only knew you bet-" Again, she puts her hand over my mouth to keep me from saying words.
"And I know better that you can't make someone like you." She answers my incomplete question. "I wish I could tell you it's no big deal, but that would be lying." Then why is she so adamant on making me care less about her ordeal? It's not fair to allow her to suffer if she is. "I just want you to know that you don't need to worry for my heart. I'll take care of it when the time comes."
"If you want me to, I'll try not to worry anymore. But if you need anything, don't forget I'm always there to support you." There's no way she can find a resolution to this so easily. We haven't found one from our talk her at all.
"Like I said before. It's not like I don't like it when you worry for me." She smiles again. "But you don't need to hold back for my sake either."
"Huh?" What does she mean? Does she mean I'm holding back on… No, that's can't be it. I'm just being stupid again. Obviously she doesn't mean anything between us.
"You're popular in class, aren't you?" She clarifies that to me. "I bet a lot of girls went and talked to you."
"How did you know?" I swear, their family are a bunch of mind readers or something.
"Heheh. Just call it a girl's intuition." She and Taisei are both good at playing coy with me. No wonder they're siblings. "Honestly, I was worried you might think about not dating because you don't want me to get left behind. But please, if someone were to confess to you, don't think about me when deciding." I'm glad she didn't tell me to just say yes. It would be my decision at the end of the day.
"I wasn't thinking of dating yet." Gosh, it's only the end of my first day of high school. I feel that's a bit early to be consider getting a girlfriend, even if there are a fair number interested in me. So you never know what the future may hold. "But, I promise that I'll be honest about my feelings."
"That's good." Finally, she gives me some space so we can get back to walking home. "It would make me sad if you held back because of me." With that, we finally head on home. We say our goodbyes, but right before I enter my house. She stops me. "Oh, and I know you always remember that part of the story." Juria really can read my mind, can't she? "But you shouldn't forget what happened after that." Finally, our time together alone comes to an end as she enters her house.
She is right, I do always leave out the part that comes after that story. I drop down my bag in my room and lay right onto my bed. It's always so nice and comfortable to just plop face first onto my pillow. School can take a lot out of you, so it's wise to have some rest before studying or doing homework.
As I lay there alone in my room, I recall what happened after my first meeting with Juria all those years ago. Unsurprisingly, it caused some animosity between our families. Her parents weren't so happy with my parents letting me freely roam over in search of their son. And they certainly were livid about me calling their daughter a monster for her appearance.
I know Taisei back then was angry with me. As far as I was aware, Juria likely was feeling down about being called such a horrible word. Even as a child, I felt guilty about insulting her, even if I was afraid for my life back then. If she didn't want to forgive me, then I wouldn't have blamed her.
As far as anyone would think. That should've been the last time I ever properly interacted with their family. Her parents didn't want me coming over after what happened, but an unlikely person came to my defense.
It was Juria.
For whatever reason, she wanted to see me again even after I had called her name. Even after I had insulted her and screamed in fear like she wasn't human. Despite all that, she still wanted to see me again. So against their personal wishes, her parents did allow a supervised visit one day.
I remember slowly walking up to her as we met for the first time after that event. A part of me was still a bit scared because of her appearance. But the main issue that caused me to be cautious was how she'd react to what I said to her. My mom gave me a good scolding for being so rude and that I should treat others with respect. Which is what I was hoping to do when we met.
But the two of us stood still for an unbearably long time. While I was waiting for her to say something, I recalled dreading that she was going to call me names and use this time as an excuse to give me a piece of her mind. Maybe even hit me in the face. Yet she did none of that.
Instead, she simply took my hand and asked me if I was being honest in what I said. Those words made me tear up. To think that I ever thought someone with a heart as kind as her's was ever a monster. In the end, I told her no. That I didn't think she was a monster. That I saw I was wrong in what I said to her at first.
For us, it was the beginning of the long running friendship that still lives on to this day.
"Huh?" When I open up my eyes again, I notice that it's nearly time for dinner. I guess I must've dozed off when remembering that story. Like a dream with a happy ending, it's made me feel much more energetic.
I get out of bed and do some stretches to prepare to meet up with my family to have some dinner. It's nice to have that weight off my shoulders. It's good to be reminded that things can turn out okay.