"Asli, wake up." I looked at Ezgi, who was holding my arms and circling me, with half unconscious eyes.
"What happened?" I said, struggling to fall asleep again.
As soon as she said, "She's still at the door," it took me a second at lightning speed to remember who she was talking about, what happened last night, I guess.
I got up from my seat. I opened my eyes to the morning when I thought I would die for sure, and my grim reaper was still waiting at the door. I stopped walking around the room and looked at Ezgi. He wasn't scared, but I could tell he was worried about me. I knew I had to put an end to this unrest.
I quickly descended the stairs. When I opened the door without thinking, Cesur and Tolga immediately got up from the sofa and stood in front of me. Ezgi had already taken her place at the corner of the door and watched us nervously.
Neither of them looked sleepy. Or they weren't cold, but I could tell by the clothes they were wearing that they had stayed here all night. Cesur had traces of dried blood on his hands. The price of breaking the window, I thought.
"You're scaring my friend," I said confidently. I was a little nervous, but now was not the time to be shy.
Tolga's gaze shifted to Ezgi, who was hiding behind the door. Cesur's eyebrows rose slightly, and he folded his hands on his chest to imitate me.
"So are we scaring you?" said. He was making fun of me.
"Get out of here. You two!" I said, ignoring his question. I was afraid, but he didn't need to know that.
I was praying that he wouldn't hear the beating of my heart when he uncrossed his brave hands and came to me in three steps. He grabbed my left arm, which was resting on my chest, and untied my arms. My mouth fell open in surprise as his warm fingers slid down my elbow and rested on my wound. He ran his thumb over my wound, keeping his eyes on mine.
"You can delay, but you can't avoid it, Asli." He pressed his thumb hard on my wound. It didn't hurt, but it gave me a shiver to know that something was out there.
He brings his face closer to mine and his lips leave a small feeling in my ear. I was sickened by the way he touched my hair. I was about to make a move to step back, but his words stopped me. "You know where to find me. I'm waiting for you." And he broke off all contact with me. I felt empty. Being so close to me made me shiver. As I got off the porch and walked towards the car, I just watched her.
Tree. He was talking about where the tree was. I knew I would find him there. The fact that he had not forgotten our meeting place made me think of Cesur for a moment as a small child.
While I was just looking behind him, Tolga said, "We'll send someone for the glass." he said and walked towards the car. While watching the car disappear from the main street, Ezgi must have been in shock like me because she was speechless.
"How about a nice breakfast?" I asked as if what had happened had never happened. I didn't want Ezgi to be restless or dislike this place. I was sure I would not go with him if he ever wanted to go back to England. But I didn't want to leave Ezgi either.
He kept looking at me with questioning eyes. "I say breakfast," I said, "get ready. I guess we can't be stuck at home all day."
"Do you plan to go?" she said while sipping her tea.
"No, my dear Ezgic." I didn't have to do the things Cesur wanted. We could talk whenever I wanted.
"He's been waiting all night. Maybe he has something important to say." I glared at Ezgi, who was starting to think to herself.
"It can wait," I said. "We came here to have breakfast. Not to talk about Cesur. We can talk about Tolga if you want, though."
I burst into laughter when she started coughing. "Who is Tolga?" he said in a voice determined to deny it to the end. We both knew how he looked at Tolga with admiration, but I decided not to push him.
"I'm looking for some jobs," I said. Even though I was exposed to Ezgi's angry gaze, I didn't mind her.
"We talked about this," he interrupted.
"Yes, but I don't want to be a burden to your family, Ezgi. Besides, working will be good for me. I don't want to stay at home all the time. There are a few jobs around here. Small jobs, but it will get me through for a while. You can also enroll in those painting courses you want so much. For you." We have to find something." i said
He nodded his head positively. We couldn't spend our whole lives sitting at home and eating daddy's money. I needed to work, even though Ezgi doesn't like working very much, I wasn't going to leave her at home. She loves to paint and was pretty good at it. It would be nice if she did an activity she liked.
After we finished our breakfast, we shopped for the house and returned home. An hour or so later some men came for the new glass and took care of their business.
"How much do we owe you?" Ezgi asked.
The middle-aged man with the belly said, "You don't have any debt, ma'am. Tolga took care of it."
Ezgi made us both a nice tired coffee. It was already dark. I couldn't stop the foxes in my head. They were wandering around. I was undecided whether to go or not. I was not afraid to go into the forest in the middle of the night. I was afraid of not knowing what to say to Cesur.
I got up with sudden excitement. I would be silent, maybe he would have spoken bravely. After all, he had something to say. It was he who called me. All I had to do was go there. I wanted to see him. I was very angry with myself for wanting such a thing, but I could not speak. The voice inside me kept calling out Cesur's name.
Since Ezgi was aware of everything, she didn't even mind that I suddenly stood up. I've been sitting on the couch for hours thinking about whether to go or not.
"I can come with you," said Ezgi. I shook my head. I wanted Ezgi to stay at home and be safe.
"I can go myself" I said as I walked up the stairs. I took a cardigan with me so I wouldn't get cold. When I went downstairs, Ezgi was waiting for me at the door. "Keep your phone on. Call me right away if there's anything." said Ezgi in a worried voice.
"Don't open the door to anyone, Ezgi," I warned her. When he opened the door for me, it was a surprise for both of us to see Tolga leaning on the porch and just following the path. With the sound of the door opening, Tolga broke away from the board he was leaning on and straightened his stance.
"What are you doing here?" I exhaled.
I first looked at Ezgi while explaining, "In case of going to Cesur, so that Ezgi does not stay alone at home." He was in a state of raising his hands, as if trying to explain that he did not know about this situation.
"So you're saying you're taking advantage of the situation?" I said. "No need, Ezgi can stay alone."
"Actually, I don't mind," said Ezgi. I don't know if his voice was muffled or if he had sunk in, but I wanted my gaze to pierce him.
I was aware of his interest in Tolga, but we couldn't trust the boy we met yesterday. I wonder why I was going after the boy I met yesterday at this hour. When I realized that our situation was the same, I reluctantly gave up.
"Okay, your phone will be on," I said. I turned to Tolga and added, "I will not feed the lamb to the wolves." He nodded at me with a mischievous smile on his face.
"Keep your phone on, too," shouted Ezgi from behind me. I was already on the path. After walking for another twenty minutes, I realized that I had approached the tree.
When I got to the tree, the person I assumed was Brave was sitting on one of the roots of the tree. "Watch the stone in front of you," he said. I lifted my feet and jumped over the stone that I could not see in the dark.
I found a place as far away from Cesur as possible and sat down. This made him laugh, but I ignored Cesur. I didn't intend to say anything.
"I'm sorry about Uncle Tahir," he said. Of course, I couldn't blame him for my grandfather's death, but when I think of the day he treated him badly, I went crazy. He laughed again when he realized I wasn't going to speak. It was a small laugh, but I could tell in the silence of the night.
"So you won't talk," he said.
"Tell me what you want from me, then I'll go," I said.
When the brave said, "I don't want you to go," I dropped one of the little stones I was holding. The person who said go four years ago was saying don't go now. "So…you don't have to go anymore." He had an air of trying to rectify the situation.
"Why was it necessary five years ago?" I asked.
"Look, Asli," he said, getting up. "I was just trying to protect you. I thought you'd be safe if you were away from me," she said. First he walked around a bit, then he started to approach me with slow steps.
"I don't understand what or who you have to protect me from, Brave," I said.
He knelt before me. Darkness prevented me from seeing his entire face. His hands touched my wound again and said, "Our secret."
I didn't want him to be this close to me. I got up from my seat. I walked towards the trunk of the tree and leaned my back against the tree. When I got up, Cesur got up from his knee and looked at me.
"It's a stupid stone, how important can it be?" I shouted. I was angry. He was still talking about protecting me. He had to stop hiding behind this excuse.
I couldn't even see when it came to me in the dark, but when I felt his hand on my mouth, I began to struggle. "Stop," he hissed through his teeth. "You mustn't tell our secret. Especially out loud."
Seriously, I nodded my head. If he killed me in this desolate forest, I'm sure no one's soul would even hear it. I still hadn't found out if he was a serial killer after all.
He quickly threw himself back. With his hand that covered my mouth, this time he was straightening his new beard.
"Asli, I'm no longer the little kid you remember. I've grown up and my responsibilities have increased."
"I have increased responsibilities, too, but I haven't been a bad person," I said. In the dark of the night, I moved a little to avoid the steely stares I felt on me.
"I'm not a bad person," he corrected me. "I just made a stupid mistake and I don't know how to fix it," he said. It was the first time I had seen Cesur so bravely.
"You didn't tell anyone about our secret, did you?" he asked when he came to me. I understood the importance of the answer to my question in his eyes. He was looking at me impatiently.
"Actually," I said.
Without waiting for my continuation, he wrapped his hands around my arm like claws. "Who did you tell?"