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Chapter 316 - [MiraMe] Go touch grass!

Shu punched a brick flying towards her, watching it shattering into dust. After that, she lowered her fist and stared at it, amazed. "Wow. Technology is great, isn't it?" She clenched her fist and then said, "That didn't hurt at all."

Suzume smiled and said, "I am glad you are enjoying yourself, Kuromi. But..." She looked over at the source of that projectile brick and said, "I believe it might be dangerous staying around here. Or at the least, troublesome."

A small crater by the road where the Myth Inc. HQ used to be. After it collapsed from being attacked by giant chunks of other buildings, Shu fell to the ground along with Suzume.

Fortunately, this wasn't real life and they were fine. Unfortunately, that meant that they couldn't use the computer to talk to Mister John or contact the outside world anymore.

And the reason for that...

"I hate you! Miya... Why do you have to be such a riajuu?!"

"I don't even know what that means!"

A strangled scream. The ground shaking like an earthquake as entire buildings were flung towards Yuri while she cut them apart with a flick of her sword.

Shu frowned and said, "I guess Miya still likes talking with her fists, huh?" She paused and said, "Or her sword? I wonder why she never joined the kendo club if she was that good though."

Suzume tucked a strand of her currently light brown hair behind her ear and said, "Because she is a gentle person at heart, unlike Rhea who seems to be very violent?"

Shu crossed her arms and said, "I didn't think Rhea was that violent though. And it's still weird not being able to say her real name."

"It is a bit strange, yes." Suzume nodded and then brushed off her shrine maiden outfit. "Although I do enjoy our outfits." She turned a bit to check on her clothes and said, "I have to admit that it is the first time wearing a comfortable miko outfit."

"Hm?" Shu turned towards Suzume and said, "They aren't comfy in reality?"

"Well. It might simply be me, but I have always found them a bit uncomfortable. Something about the presence and presentation-"

A sudden flurry of projectile rubble, flying towards Suzume.

Shu instinctively moved and threw out her fists. A rapid string of punches, flowing into a barrage of kicks. After she finished, she turned her back on the rubble and looked at Suzume. "Are you alright, Tsubame? That was dangerous..."

"I am fine. Although..." She peeked behind Shu to look at the rubble. "...Virtual reality is quite strange."

Shu turned around as well to see the rubble frozen in mid-air. As if waiting for her to do just that, light flashed and the rubble burst into dust, collapsing onto the ground in a gray heap.

"...Yes. I think that-"

An explosion off in the distance. Chihiro sent flying through a dozen different buildings after Yuri swung her sword.

"...I think that this is definitely strange." Shu glanced at a few strands of purple hair that had covered her eyes and tucked them away. "It's like we have super powers." She held her hands out and slowly clenched her fists. As she did, she felt a thrum of power in them that she didn't in reality. Almost like her blood was burning. "...It's kind of scary." She unclenched her fists and looked at the ruined city. "No wonder Aoko senpai went a little crazy."

"I believe that is more because the 'wind masters' that watch her have too much money and time on their hands... But more or less, I suppose." Suzume tucked her hands in her sleeves and said, "What should we do now? I think those two will be at it for a while still."

"MIYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Chihiro's strangled scream from up above, paired with... a sky filled glowing circles?

Shu quickly backed away and said, "I-I think you had the right idea. Let's get out of-"

"Pyon?"

Shu blinked and looked over at the strange sound.

It was a blue blob. A cute little thing with a black smiley face and four little spheres that looked like hands and feet.

Suzume turned to look as well and then tilted her head. "What is that?"

"I don't know, but it's cute!" Shu smiled and then walked over, crouching down in front of it. "Hello there, mister jello!" She reached out her hand to pat it and said, "How are you-"

"BURST CALAMITY!"

"Treasured Tool!" Yuri shifted her stance, holding her katana parallel to the ground. "Seeking perfection in imperfection, sublimity through simplicity..."

"Pyon!"

The blue blob bounced, jumping over Shu and Suzume.

"E-Eh?" Shu turned to look. "Wait, mister jello-"

"FIRE!"

"Void Paradox!"

An explosion of lights and colors firing towards the ground.

And not just at Yuri.

"KYAAAAA!" Shu screamed and instinctively closed her eyes as the barrage of colors flew towards them as well.

Suzume sighed. "For a martial artist, you certainly lack courage, Kuromi..."

*boingoinoing*

A weird rubbery sound amidst the constant bombardment all around them.

Shu blinked and opened her eyes to see a blue dome covering them all.

"Pyonyo!"

"M-Mister jello!?"

A black smiley face appeared on the dome and winked at Shu before looking back up at the sky.

Shu did the same. And then she blinked and said, "...Virtual reality is incredible, huh?"

A sky filled with light and explosions. But not completely.

Right where Yuri was standing, and all the way up to Chihiro, there was a gap. As if absolute territory that couldn't be reached, the lights flew completely around it.

Chihiro gnashed her teeth and swept her hands, trying to aim the lights at Yuri. But they didn't reach.

Yuri swept her sword to the side and then said, "It's time to grit your teeth, you cheeky brat!"

"MIYAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Yuri kicked off the ground, disappearing for a moment. In the next, she appeared in front of Chihiro, swinging her sword. "Take a time out!"

A silver flash, followed by Yuri flying past Chihiro.

Chihiro froze and slowly turned around. "Damn you... Riajuu...!"

Her clothes were starting to fall apart, dissolving into golden feathers along with pieces her body. "Don't think this is over! I won't forget-"

"Oh shut up and just log off already." Yuri swung around and smacked Chihiro over the head with the pommel of her blade. "You play too many games anyway."

A soft *click.* Specifically, the sound of a mouse click.

The moment that echoed, Chihiro burst into light and vanished. In her place, a flurry of windows appeared.

[User has been disconnected]

[Cause of timeout: Being too toxic]

[Parting notes: Go touch some grass, gurl]

"Pyonyo?"

The blue jello creature rippled before turning back into its sphere form.

Suzume smiled at that and patted it on its head. "Thank you, Jello-kun."

"Pyon! Pyonyo!"

It smiled back, squinting its eyes and looking content.

Shu smiled at it as well, but then turned her attention back to Yuri and where Chihiro had just vanished. "...I guess we need to take her out more."

Shu thought that Chi-chan had been fine with everything since she always played it cool and seemed to be having fun when they chatted. But from how extreme she had just acted...

"Tsubame?"

Suzume blinked and looked over at Shu. "Yes?"

"The onsen trip is still planned, right?"

"Of course." Suzume nodded and said, "My adoptive parents have already agreed to host us. Ah, they did mention that another group had reserved some lodgings as well, but they appear to be another group of girls out for the holidays."

"That's good." Shu sighed and then rubbed the back of her head. "I think we all need to spend a bit of time away from technology for a while-"

"@$@#$#@! I can't fly!" Yuri screamed and suddenly started plummeting towards the ground face first.

A loud explosion erupted as she landed, followed by a mushroom cloud of smoke.

Shu gasped and ran over. "Mimi?! Are you alright?"

A hand waved the smoke away and Yuri called out. "I'm fine. Just... Dammit. I was floating for a bit talking to her. Why did the game or whatever suddenly decide to drop me to the ground?"

Shu helped Yuri up and laughed. "I don't know, but I'm glad you're okay."

"Of course I'm okay." Yuri brushed herself off and smiled. "After being humiliated in public chasing Mister John around because of a misunderstanding and then breaking down in tears after having his ramen, nothing else is really that bad."

"Eh?"

Yuri sighed and said, "Long story. I'll tell you about it on the trip-"

[WARNING! WARNING!]

"...Huh?"

Sirens, suddenly blaring from all around. The sky filled with red warning messages.

Suzume ran over holding the blue blob and said, "W-What is going on this time?"

Yuri rested her hand on her sword and said, "I don't know- Hm?" She noticed the blob in Suzume's arms and pointed at it. "What's that?"

"This?" Suzume looked down and smiled. "It's Jello-kun!"

"...Jello-kun?" Yuri turned to look at Shu.

Shu smiled. "Yep! Jello-kun." She reached out to pat the blob and said, "This guy protected us from all of those explosions just now."

Yuri frowned and instinctively took a few steps back.

Suzume tilted her head. "Mi-"

[SYSTEM MESSAGE: Blurby the Slime King has awakened]

A cold and mechanical voice echoing all around.

The moment it did, the blue blob in Suzume's hands expanded and gobbled her whole.

"T-Tsubame?!"

"I KNEW IT!"

"MMMMMPH?!?!?!"

-----AI|IA-----

Back in the streaming studio, Amadeus and Titor turned to look at John.

He coughed and said, "I-It's going to stay PG, promise."

*A-Are Tsubame's clothes dissolving?!*

*You blue bastard! Let her go!*

*Gah! My punches aren't doing anything-*

*Hn~!*

*S-Sorry, Tsubame! I didn't realize the shockwave would transfer!*

John started to sweat.

Okay. Maybe he should have been a bit more deliberate in which of his low level familiar he tossed out...

Well.

...At least it would be great content later for the girls to use?

*That's it! I'm ending this now! Treasured Tool! Seeking-*

*Miya, watch out!*

*W-Wha- MMPH!?!?!?!*

"...I'll be right back."

Dammit. Maybe he should've tossed his H-collection instead of stashing it away. It was starting to look like it was having weird influences on the things left in his Heavenly Realm-

Wait.

...Was that why Betty and Alphy...?

As John stepped into the light to warp into his Heavenly Realm, he sighed and muttered, "God I've been a terrible Dad."

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