I pegged myself as a 'love fool'. How else can you call a senior girl horribly in love with a boy since middle school? All the school would have laughed if they knew, I was sure. I was laughing, too, sometimes.
His name was Michael. We had Calculus class on the first lesson on Tuesday and Physics class on the third lesson every Friday. His presence in class was the actual reason why I barely scraped through the exams in Calc and Phys -- I just couldn't concentrate on the material and gazed at Mike every lesson. I was sure he didn't love me back, so every time he looked at me, I flushed and started staring at the window so excited as if there was vampire Robert Pattison shining in the sun or something like that.
Surprisingly, I did try to confess to him several times. Every time, something went wrong before I even started to talk to Mike. The first time, a magpie stole my glasses just from my face, and I killed an hour trying to return them. The second time, I sneezed on Michael's new white shirt and escaped. After that one, I started to call myself not just the 'love fool', but also a 'fool in love'.
However, this time I decided to talk to him even if a goddamn tornado was going to suck me up and throw me out in Kazakhstan. The prom was coming, and to ask Michael to it was the last chance of mine.
I found Mike in the school's cafeteria, standing in the line and ordering mashed potatoes and salad. I should have waited for him to sit at the table, so we could talk privately, but then I was in a kind of rush, so I decided to confess to him just in the line.
I dared to ask Michael out to prom, and nothing else mattered then. I stood in front of him.
"I kinda love you and yeah I know you don't like me, but what do you think about going to prom together? It would be funny huh", I said, rambling and becoming quieter and quieter while I was speaking.
First, Mike stood wordlessly. Then, his face shined with relief, and a beautiful smile showed on his face.
He said he had wanted to ask me out, but he thought I didn't like him. That's what was actually funny, I thought. We both thought our feelings weren't mutual. He thought he was the 'love fool', too.
Then, he started talking, rambling, as I was. He said he loved me, but all this time he was so afraid to talk to me. He thought the looks I was giving to him were suspicious. I got so engrossed in his talk that I didn't notice that we created the jam in the cafeteria line. Someone was shouting that they would throw a milk pack at us if we didn't stop our drama. Michael and I just laughed.
I pegged myself as a 'love fool'. I thought I was insulting myself this way. But does it matter that you're a fool, if you have the same fool, and you are happy together?
Let me be the worst fool if in return I am loved and in love.