Amelia could feel the twitching in her fingers as she held her hands at her sides. Clutching them into fists for her own comfort, blood felt pumping through her veins. A rapid pulse rushing in her hands, her chest, and her throat. Saliva becomes nonexistent, bile filling up her airways to be able to breathe. Her entire body felt as if it was piling up for the climax of the conversation.
Either she was going to fall from bad news, or be relieved with satisfaction. She could tell from the saddened stare in her father's eyes, that was never an option.
"Dallas, is working with Jake."
Her heart drops into her stomach at those simple yet damning words.
"And he ordered his brother to be killed."
Her own mind can't wrap around the words she's hearing. This had to be a dream, an awful dream. If she pinched herself, there had to be a chance she would wake up from the burdening nightmare. Dallas was the man who guided her, who gave her the wings to fly into the sky and flourish. Without him there would be no agent, proud and brash.
How could he be working with the man he swore to protect her from? It had to be a lie, there was no possible way he could. After all of the betrayal she had suffered, how could the man she laid next to every night be the one to stab her so violently in the back? The one who pressed kisses so lovingly and passionately to her lips. Dallas, who had shown her the entire world and more.
Amelia had let all her walls fall completely for him, only hours before. Wrapped in the warmth of his embrace, pledging their eternal love to each other in whispers. Melting into one another with delicacy, as if they had never loved as hard before each other.
The moment the walls were no longer able to protect her, the spears began to fly. No protection from the piercing words, from the very possible and harsh reality. Just the sentences alone has her entire body collapsing in on itself.
The air feels scarce, as if she's gasping for a single breath. The young agent stammers to find the words to say to her father. "What? Dad, clearly you've misheard something–"
"Amelia. You are in more danger than you ever have been! You need to lis–" Yet before he can finish his words, he begins to cough violently.
At the sight of her father's deteriorating health, she rushes over to him. A worried expression on her face as she leads him over to the side on one of the armchairs. "Dad please, you're hurting yourself. I'm worried about you."
Amelia leans forward to hand her father her cup of coffee, Charlie taking it into his hands and taking a sip. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm overwhelmed by it all." He sighs, handing the cup back to his daughter.
"Dad, it's okay. Now explain to me at your own pace." It's clear that her tone shows the worry without even looking at her expression. She sits down on the edge of the couch, waiting for her father to speak.
The older man nods, taking a deep breath before he begins. "A month back, I called Brenden in to help catch Parker. When you were kidnapped by him."
It had been a month already, a month since she made that deal. If her heart couldn't drop any lower, it did just then. Realizing her father's life was more on the line with every passing day– She had only three months left. The burdens are piling one on one now, towering higher than ever before.
Her rushing thoughts don't stop her from listening to her father's tale, leaning in closer to hear. "Throughout finding it was in fact Parker, he began to have suspicions on Dallas. When he wanted your kidnapping to be quiet."
Dallas wanted to keep her kidnapping quiet, but that could have been for other reasons. An uproar of the most capable agent being at her weakest moment was not good for their agency. She understood, to an extent, that part of the story.
"So Brenden followed Dallas to a remote area, where he saw Parker and Linch having an exchange."
Amelia's eyes widen, the rushing of her heart getting even faster. She could feel her head becoming light, the dizziness taking effect of her senses. His words had an instant effect on her that gave no warning. Crashing down on her completely, pushing her out of focus.
"He recorded the encounter, confirming that he not only wanted to kill his brother, but killed his parents."
Each sentence was another nail in her own coffin– She had set herself up again for destruction. Choosing yet another man who ultimately would destroy her, ruin everything she had worked so hard to protect. Her sanity, her dignity, her livelihood– Amelia's entire life was at risk. She was naïve yet again with her choices, letting the walls fall at the worst time.
She should have never fallen in love with another man again.
Dallas had become a mystery to her, and hearing her father speak only twisted the image she had thought to memorize of him. His parents were killed by his own hands– His brother was ordered to be killed at his command. How could she have not seen these things coming? Amelia had let what felt like blossoming love blind her from the flags waving brightly in her view.
Now here she was suffering the consequences for her stupidity.
"His parents died in a fire when he was ten.. He killed them?" She pulls her hands up to her mouth, trying her best not to let any tears escape her eyes. "Oh my God, no it can't be that."
"He said it himself, as did Parker. I am not one to trust that disgusting man.." Charlie pauses, shaking his head. "But there's no way he would cover for another who has you."
The sadness and shock quickly turns into fear, shaking evident through her entire body. Goosebumps rising on her skin, panic seeping deep into her core. Looking around the home the two shared together, quickly realizing the gravity of the situation.
Their lives had been one for five long years, everything they had ever had was now one. How could she go from sharing everything with one man, to then pull away without suspicions arising on her reasonings? He knew her inside and out, he would know there was something wrong with her.
Dallas would know that she knew with just one glance at her. Just the presence of fear in her eyes would give everything away.
Amelia was panicking, breathing quickly as she looked back at her father. "If this is true.. Dad, what do I do? Where do I go?"
"I will come back here and get you. I'll clean up my spare room for you. You'll stay with me as long as it takes to get him put away." He grabs onto his daughter's tightly, giving them a light squeeze. "Please wait for me, okay?"
Here she was once more, a damsel in distress. Amelia hated the feeling, relying on someone else she cared for to protect her. All the years of training, of keen knowledge and craft– Wasted in an instant when vulnerability was near. Placed like a target on her back, larger than it had ever been before.
Seventeen felt closer in the back of her mind, the same scenario. Others risked their lives to protect her, with their deaths being her fault entirely. Blood soaked hands for so many years, still unable to get rid of the horrid images. Amelia could not let herself fall into that position again, not after everything she had done to strengthen herself.
"I will, please be back soon."
That's all she could muster to say to him. There was no point fighting his help, yet she didn't wish for his shield either. Not only was she a grown woman, danger had mocked her many times. Practically laughing in her face with each encounter, finding joy in the struggles. Watching her squirm violently, trying with all her might to escape its mighty claws.
No remorse, no mercy for the girl born into chaos. A little game for the dealers of fate, tossing misery and turmoil at every chance they got. Even now as her father cupped her cheeks with warmth, her entire body felt ice cold. As if her once warm blood turned into streams of ice and snow.
His fingers rub on the cold surface of her skin, sadness staring back at her. "You have always been my strong little girl." Charlie leans forward, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
Strength was built over time, and yet it seemed with every passing day that same strength dwindled. Leaning on others for comfort, for reassurance and protection. The worst realization to be found–Going back into the reclusive state. Unable to truly protect herself on her own, no matter how hard she pushed for full dependency on herself only.
"I love you, dad."
He couldn't be the next to die because of her, it would completely crush her. To lose the one man who stood by her from the moment she was born. Even when finding out he didn't have to raise her any longer, he stayed. A father by choice even if there was no blood of similarity running through their veins. Charlie showed love and compassion to her throughout the worst years of her life, relished in the moment of happiness. Applauded her in her achievements, cried at the sight of growth– He was a true father.
"I love you too honey. Stay safe until I come back."
A true father would risk their life for their child– Amelia knew it was on his mind. If worse came to worst, he would want his young daughter to live on. A mindset she knew too well from her father. He saw his life as already lived, and hers yet to begin.
As she watched him walk out of her home, she wished she could change his mind. If she was meant to die, then so be it. Her own father couldn't die in her place, Amelia wouldn't let him. Yet all she can do is watch as he quickly rushes himself out of the front door, closing it with the rushing wind behind him.
The looming silence returns, as the young woman stands in her own living room– For the first time feeling foreign in her own home. A stranger horrified by the gray color painted on the walls, the wide and clear windows peeking out into the city below. Frightened by the decor that once showed the compromise of sharing a home together, a life.
Pictures sitting on top of the fireplace now show no resemblance to the people who smiled brightly in the frames. Just looking in their direction has her heart tightened in her chest. The way they used to be, the beautiful memories that now had her breathing catching itself.
Their smiles, the way they held one another in the privacy of their home. Achievements, dates, casual dates captured in a single moment– Not a single one showing any deception. Staring into the still image, the forever widened eyes of her lover. Hues swirled with shades of purple that captivated her, swallowing her senses with just one glance.
Just by the way he looked down at her in the photographs, showed compassion. The warmth of his gaze, the sweet light edge of his lips curled into a smile. How could the loving stare hold any malice, any cruel intent behind long eyelashes? It didn't make sense, not in the slightest.
With a gentle touch, she grabs onto one of the photos. Pulling it off of its position and into her hands, staring down at the photo. Her and Dallas with face masks across their skin, laughing together laying on the silk sheets of their bed. The way he looked towards her was nothing short of heartwarming in the past, and yet now saddened by it.
"Who did I really give my life to."