Xiaochen Pov
You'd think after leading a chase that has sent me thousands of miles away from home and braving through gravity over a hundred times that of the former planet Jupiter would leave me tired. Especially after spending all night worrying and trying to avoid this moment. Yet now that we are falling on each other again after that night, something has changed.
For decades I've served my purpose at the King's side with Romario Triavola, loyally and dutifully. Ever since he saved me, I promised to carry out his every wish to pay off the debt I owed. I simply thought that my earlier allegiance would still hold true with his passing of the torch. However, whenever I see that unchanging face, that pigheaded inflexibility, and utter humanity clash with everything I've ever known, I can't help but think that I'm.
"I'm sorry, my King. I forced you to use your power despite your grave injuries. I also nearly destroyed our Nox base, put hundreds of lives at risk, and potentially exposed your presence over New Korea. All because I got flustered at nearly forgetting your title. I truly am an atrocious right hand, aren't I? So if you wish to demote me or unleash punishment, then I will happily take it, for I have sinned," I said while bowing down to hide my tears.
Time slowed down to an agonizing crawl as I waited for the King's holy judgment. Yet instead of a raised fist, the same one that slain countless monsters and humans as possible, I got met with an open hand. Even without touching or talking I could feel his gentleness flowing through as heavenly power regenerated the ravaged field at a steady pace. Shortly after the miraculous feat, he placed his right hand on my head lovingly while the Sage of the west talked to me on an "equal" footing through kneeling. The next words that he chose were both careful and decisive.
"Don't talk like that; You've been the only thing holding both Nox and me together. There's frankly no one else I can count on who's on your level. Also, considering that I don't see Mubong's forces or any casualties from Nox, I think that we are good. Finally, I'm glad that you almost used my real name for the record. I wish you did it more frankly. So stop apologizing for things that you didn't do wrong or things out of your control. Do you hear me?" he said emotionally, almost as if he wasn't talking about himself anymore.
That sentence almost made me lose it right then and there. But, instead, the tears only started to stream down my face even harder, pelting the ground like rain. Embarrassment, sorrow, and happiness mixed into a powerful cocktail that completely overwhelmed me. For the first time in seventeen years, I finally had to face the music.
Ever since he saved me my day, I thought that I could pay Ohkwang back by serving at his side in debt. So after Ragnorak, when I had finally had time to absorb his death, I thought I could cope by serving his true host.
That never made the pain go away, though if anything, the method only ate away at me slowly. Not a night went by where I didn't replay those events in my head over and over again. I know the other members of Nox didn't dare say it directly, but they didn't need to. I swear I could hear their backhanded comments.
"Why weren't you strong enough, Xioachen?"
"Why weren't you fast enough, Xioachen?"
"Why weren't you smart enough, Xioachen?"
"Why couldn't you protect our King Xioachen?"
"Why didn't you die alongside him, Xioachen?"
Each of those comments engraved themselves on their heart, forcing me to work harder and keep all my feelings inside for the greater good. Yet, whether it be indirectly or directly, this stubborn man saw through it all and gave me the forgiveness I couldn't give to myself. After that realization, happiness managed to flood through me more than anything.
Eventually, I reimagined a more dignified approach, wiping away my tears and makeup to address "him" with my true face. Finally, after using the primeval borrowed power, I tried to hide the scars and imperfections.
"I hear you loud and clear, Daewi," I said to a person I now see in a whole new light.
A mix of surprise and content took over his face, as Dawei gave me a smile I'll treasure forever while saying.
"That's great to hear," he said as the sunlight showed on what might as well be a brand new day.