Days went by, nothing happened, I had lost my interest in everything, I didn't read, I didn't write, I didn't eat, I didn't sleep, I was just on bed. I had even stopped drawing. I felt quite frustrated all the time. I didn't even come out of my room, doctors came to check, and I was perfectly healthy, nothing wrong. It is nothing but a proof that body and mind are different, and at times body doesn't react to the changes in mind. The communication between me and my family had always been through sign language. It seemed more like dance to me, I preferred to write but then it wasn't possible all the time. I was used to it, the sympathy, the taunts, the words which I wish I could have said if only I had voice. I am selfish person I guess, for I was concerned only about my wishes, my pain, my sorrow, my possessions and nothing else. I don't know if it's right or wrong, but that is what I am. I woke up every day with the hope, hope another mysterious word, which makes or in a way fools us to be something else. My faith didn't go less; I spent hours staring to those words. Finally, I dismissed such thoughts, I realized it's baseless, not going to classes, it was just my imagination, so I woke up finally from a long dream. I got back to my life, made myself busy. It was like I was going through a break up, but I couldn't say this to anyone because no one would understand it.
In between seeing me in such sorrow, my sister had advised Jai to come over and talk to me. My mother came along with him in my room to tell me that he was here. He came and sat next to me, he said, "So what is going on mystery girl, what is happening, why you haven't replied to any of my messages?"
I just look at him, wondering if I should share with him what had happened. I decide to give it a try. He tells me the latest news happening in the campus. I knew it would be the same rubbish happening in our campus. I take my notebook and he says, "Maya there is nothing to be written down, what is this?" I show him, I ask him to read it. He reads all the conversations and I could see his face change.
He asks me, "What are you doing to yourself; you are talking to yourself in another handwriting?" I tell him that it is the pen, he asks me where it was, and I couldn't find it. I show him few of my drawings which I had drawn as per his instruction.
Jai was getting irritated; he asked me "Is this some kind of new joke? This isn't funny. And in case you are serious, this is foolishness; I can't believe you fell for a pen?" I got furious hearing this; I didn't fall for a pen. I could see he was having teary eyes, I ask what happened. He just says nothing, and after a while he confesses that he likes me. I felt happy, because I know I will be happy with him. I smile with bit of blushing; I guess he understood my answer. He was also smiling. It was time for him to leave; he gave me kiss suddenly and ran out of my room. He turned back while going and I was smiling. It felt like that perfect movie scene.
I was back to my normal life, when again one night, it was raining heavily, I loved to look at the sky when it rained. I was feeling so happy, as my life had new beginning. It was foolish to believe a pen and all but what happened after that was nice. I have a best friend now and he is also my partner in everything. I opened the windows, closed my eyes and went forward, raindrops kissed my cheeks. I went more forward, feeling each rain drop on my skin. I started playing with them, as each drop passed, trying to catch them and then letting it go. I was enjoying rain, after all this time; it is now that I really felt the beauty of rain. I closed the windows, and as I turned back I saw someone standing there, I was scared to death. With the kind of things happening in our society I could think of everything that could happen and no one would ever know if I was alive or dead for the ones with voice are not able to escape what would I do.
I moved back trying to get hold of sharp object, the stranger was looking straight to my eyes, observing me , and smiling , I couldn't clearly get what his intentions were , he seemed nice. I moved back and he took a step forward. He came towards the chair, looked at notebook which was lying in the floor. He took the notebook in his hands, and looked at me again smiling. I was confused more than scared, what he wants. I hated when someone invaded my privacy. I liked being alone, playing with words, or drawing up things I imagined. I didn't like social media. I didn't feel it like media at all, take any social media platform all you could see is, there pictures, it's as if there is no moment in their life which goes without posting update. People would comment, wow, nice, you look good, and stuff like that, no one would ever even say hi if you met in real. Everyone is online but do they even talk. I felt it way to out of my league, and stayed away besides, my only friends are my family and these books and pens, that are my world. It is so strange; all these thoughts were passing by me when I am confronted with a total stranger. I take look closer that's when I realise he has the face of the person I drew. I was feeling really nervous now; did I just bring a sketch to life?
He was still looking at me, smiling, finally he broke silence, he sat in stool which was there, and said, "Have a seat please." I moved the chair bit and sat. Just as much as I hated humans, I hated human touch also. I hated it when anyone touches me, it might be weird but I didn't like it at all. He spoke again, "You didn't recognize me didn't you?" He was smiling again looking at me , I tried to remember all guys whom I have known, I haven't known much because I didn't like them. I gave an expression of me –don't-know-who-the-hell-you-are-please-fuck-off.
He seemed to get it, he spoke again "When I wasn't here you were crying and all, now when I am back you don't recognise me, you even drew me."
I felt like hitting him, I didn't even look at him this time, he continued, "I told you I will be back my princess."
I looked up, my eyes opened wide, I didn't believe it yet, because it could be someone who has read it and fooling me, so I waited to hear what he was saying.
He continued, "I know you don't believe me, but…" He fell silent, and after few moments, he spoke exactly what we had spoken before, I wasn't yet convinced. I thought it was Jai, only he knew about this, but he wouldn't memorize these to fool me. He took notebook, kept it aside; he spoke about me, things which I hadn't shared to anyone than to those papers. I was convinced now but how did that pen become a human , that was what kept running in my mind, I wanted to ask but how would I ask, it's in times like this that I hated myself.
He somewhat understood I guess, he said, "I know what you are thinking, how did I become I human isn't it? Human mind has the power to do anything, you don't belong in here that is why when time came, you had drawn your home, and I, for you belong to me."
I shrugged; I knew it was a lie. What is this, firstly how dare he come to my room? I went to my parent's room; I woke them up, made them come to my room. I told them in actions that there is someone. They searched everywhere, they couldn't see anyone. My mother woke my sister by then. She told my sister to sleep with me. I felt relieved.
I went to my sister's room. It was exact opposite of mine. Her room was how a girl would keep it. All pinkish and girlish. Whatever it was, she was one of my closest friends. She could understand whatever I had in my mind.
She asked me, "Maya, what happened, saw any dream or read any book?" I didn't say anything. She said again, "Okay, don't worry, if you want to share, am here okay?" She smiled, I smiled back I did want to share, but how would I share? I messaged Jai too, he just replied saying that I might have dreamt nothing else. I went and took a sketchbook. I told her to wait, she said she will, but by the time I finished drawing, she had slept. We studied in the same college. She was a year elder to me.
The next day while going she said, "I read what you wrote, is it true? I mean all these happen? I have only seen in movies." I shrugged again. She asked if someone was doing this purposely and if I had told this to Jai, I nodded. We both left to our classes. The day went as usual, it was fine, and though I was scared nothing happened. We returned back, I said I would sleep with her tonight also. She said I should sleep in my room, and if something like that happens, she would come out, she would hide somewhere. I waited eagerly for him to come. He came, as expected, in some weird type of dress.
He was smiling, and said, "You don't believe me don't you? That's why you have called your sister tonight, where is she? I would like to meet her."
I made some noises, which made my sister alert; she came out with a stick, just to find no one. I was really irritated now. I decided I won't tell it to anyone. I would handle it myself. My sister left my room after some time. We waited, but no one was there. She told me to call her if there is anything and she left.
After few minutes of her leaving, he came appeared again.
He opened the notebook and says, "Why are you having so much doubts, it's me only, the one who spoke to you. I had told you that I would be back, now that am back you do not believe me. What should I do to make you believe me?"
I didn't say anything, I just look at him. Somewhere I felt he was saying truth.
He said, "I want you to take somewhere, will you come with me?" I look at him with doubt, he says, "You can trust me, I will never cause any harm to you. I promise you that and I also promise that I would take utmost care of you at any cost. "He lend his hand to me, and I don't know I was lost in his eyes, I felt what he said was true. I move forward, I could see something coming to me, it was all powders.
I faint with the smell of it, and I don't understand what happened. I could see I was not in my body; I was out of it, standing next to him.
He was smiling, he said, "I know, am sorry, I needed to do this, it is for your good. Come along princess." Saying so he held my hands. I wasn't in my senses; I was feeling dizzy like any moment I would faint. He took my hand and I had this drunk type of feeling. I don't really remember what happened.