It is dark, the streets are deserted and empty, unknown things happen at any moment where the lights of the dim lamps do not reach.
Some go out to explore in a happy dream in peace, some drink in a troubled way. Some end their suffocating life or a new life is blooming in some place...
Cracking sounds one after another could be heard in a gray area devoid of heat, devoid of colour.
The electric current sizzled for a moment, and the security alarm sounded, making everyone uneasy to their feet.
***
Although it was quite late at night, the person in the bed stared at the ceiling and struggled on the bed sleeplessly.
A voice seemed to echo in his ear.
"Nanren, we hope to see you soon"
His tone was neither arrogant nor commanding. But the soft tenderness hidden beneath the normal tone made him helpless more than anything. Naraf, his brother was going to say these words in an almost pleading tone now.
The emotional burden a few words could not lift made her tone tremble.
Nanren lowered his head at that moment, shattered by the congestion in his chest and a kind of spiritual constriction.
He didn't hesitate.
His eyes were empty and helpless. He squinted intricately and grabbed the blanket over me with a dazed expression.
Family?
He really had no face to go.
In his previous life, he hurt not only himself but everyone around him with hatred and grudge. Clearly he is a really disgusting man.
He remembers.
No, in fact, he never forgets.
Can't forget.
Your destiny drawn with blood instead of ink.
It was his birthday that day. His family was clearly eager to act kindly to bind up their wounds. But he was someone who was only aware of the existence of his new family.
His mind was buzzing and his mind was blank.
Family?
Did he have family?
a parent?
Nanren never imagined that what she had longed for as a child would now become a thorn in her heart.
He had openly admitted that he was already alone in this world. Why do they suddenly appear before him and drag him back to hell?
His adoptive family was constantly in front of his eyes. Their sweet and warm love is something he does not dare to desire, and they died before he could even open his heart to them.
When he was very young, he was in the orphanage.
The children surrounded him and made fun of him. Clearly they were all orphans, but Nanren was the only outcast among them.
Actually, there was a reason for it. When the cleaner who accompanied him committed suicide, everyone did not hesitate to blame him for his presence there.
In fact, this wasn't the first time someone had seen his death. The streets were a very good place to house orphans.
But it was the first time he'd been held responsible for someone's death.
He lay in amazement with his self-absorbed mind.
The streets have parented him more than anyone else. Even when he was in the hands of his step-uncle, the streets embraced him.
Life is a harsh teacher. Without any warning, a storm can break out suddenly in the midst of peace.
He must be alert even while he sleeps, not an inch of his muscles relax.
And one of the biggest lessons the streets have taught him is that reality destroys sweet dreams.
The sense of belonging, self-consciousness, and even the sense of being are erased.
No one asks your name on the streets. It is unnecessary. You talk as much as your wealth and gain self-confidence. The rest is blank. Bullying or coercion, it's all a pathetic drama.
The streets advise you not to trust anyone. Your beloved father may sell you for a few things, your angel-like mother may have gone insane or even killed you. It's all just a matter of seconds, and everything else is nothing but a few insignificant, empty moments.
People make art as much as they can make sense of it. It is essentially seeing and perceiving the mind. Often there are no clever designs and plots. There is love and lust, yet they are all essentially animal desires suppressed in the name of humanity.
In short, it all starts and ends only in the human mind.
People play, they play themselves.
And clearly...
The more you desire something, the more unattainable it becomes in your eyes.
Nanren never felt an overwhelming sense of belonging. The only time he ever felt, the person whose heart he wanted to rip out his claws already had become a mind-shattering person.
The Ji family and that person who tied him there. Ji Yun.
...
And now Nanren was ashamed.
Not only out of guilt, but also from unstable emotions. There were unbalanced feelings on both sides, and the clearly dominant side was now his family, who wanted to see him more than anything else.
Even in such a situation, he could not help but pause and question.
Are there really such good people in the world? Developing feelings without any encounters just because they share the same blood?
"Impossible," Nanren said.
Impossible.
He clearly still sees the reality of this world, what person would want to take a burden on him, even a relative?
For example, even his current good relationship with the Ji family clearly began with the equal contract he once was. It was a mutual exchange. No one exploited one side. It is a win-win or mutualism relationship in the animal world. Clearly parasitism cannot be offered.
Now the emergence of his family was no different than dragging him into a confusion of terms. His spirit was collapsing, like a shipwreck that had capsized in the gutter.
His life, which was starting to improve, suddenly became involved in a rebellion. His chaotic mental state lost his ability to assess the situation.
He's fed up.
He lost all his courage, he just wanted to forget everything and go to a place where no one was.
***
"At the age of 21, in the heyday of his life, young actor Huai Nanren ended his acting career-"
"-withdrawn..."
"...by announcing his permanent farewell..."
"...resigned..."
Despite Yun's little attention and his own failure in this industry, Nanren was truly a man of up-and-coming promise. Beyond his usual temperament and his stupidly naive, innocent appearance, he certainly seemed the type to be pushed into the background.
After all, Yun said that although he's always shown his flirty or awkward side around Nanren these days, he definitely doesn't know the person on TV.
Yun :...
He squinted his eyes at a fragment from movies or interviews on the news channels.
Whether in the movie or in the interview, this person was definitely not the person he knew.
If he was in the movie, he could adapt to any different personality, mood, and setting.
The man on the television was alienated, kind and distant, careful with his words, but sharp at the same time. His words were heavy and authoritative, as if judging.
In the interview, however, this apparent high self-confidence, high eyes looking at the camera was bright and confident, as if it was deeply connected to the soul.
The corner of his lips is slightly upturned, his eyes are firmly slit, his eyebrows are relaxed, and his shoulders are straight. With his straight spine radiant though standing among many people, this high look was not the one he knew.
"No wonder…" he muttered.
Pretending to have things that don't exist, even things they don't have... from the calm mood he showed in the interview to his body language, they complement each other in perfect harmony. After one believes, who can refuse?
No wonder she's so talented. How can someone who has spent his life acting all fail to fail in fleeting moments?
But to put an end to it...
He could guess Yun Nanren's mindset. He was tired now. From the invisible chains, the oppression, and living according to everyone's will. Perhaps it was an official announcement that he was tired and clearly putting an end to it.
He took out his phone and dialed the number.
"Beep beep beep--"
As predicted.
He could guess that he must be in a restless mood right now. But maybe he really needed some solitude.
-To be continued-