Despite being a man, this frail and deconstructed-looking body that stood out in front of other men, to be honest, was not remarkable at all. He couldn't use his face as a horse either, all Shura could benefit from were best and brand designer clothes combined with a sense of secrecy. He didn't hesitate to use it either. Maybe that's why even though he had no advantages, on the face of it, Yun Shura's increasingly fanning of the flames suddenly escalated.
But soon Shura and his staff would realize something too!
The flaming, wild power of a weak immune system and weak-looking body!
It needs to give an elegant and deep feeling in appearance with thin body and silver glasses looking slim.
There was muscle mass with light lines on the jade arm, which looked thin, and moreover, it was not an artificial body obtained with these drugs.
As a result of Yun's wilderness survival-themed missions, although he lost muscle mass over time due to the office environment rather than extreme and strenuous sports, he still looked no worse than before due to his lack of fat gain and the availability of good nutrition. The slender waist looked stiff and tight when the garment was slowly lifted. Abdominal muscles! Its lines were very clear and symmetrical as if it had been cut neatly. Her fine lines and curves were more explosive and powerful than she looked. Shura's eyes suddenly lit up and she couldn't help but grin.
He squinted his eyes, approached slowly, and whispered mockingly so only the two of them could hear.
"To think that my sister, who can't get her ass off reading a book, will one day get a body like this…tsk, seriously!"
Yun ignored his taunts.
For Shura, the new district was ready for him. She was determined to use her sister's talents to the bottom, and modeling was just her starting point. Obviously Yun didn't fit in, but how could he make his acting debut with his lack of emotions? In order not to waste time, Shura made the decision to prepare slowly and thoroughly.
Even if this business was only progressed with Shura's support as a result of Yun's inadequacy in certain aspects due to her female body's shortcomings compared to male ones.
***
While Shura was making plans, knowing that this wouldn't be the case with the warmer weather, Yun dyed her hair black with hairspray, bought a pair of regular black lenses and wore them. At least he was no longer required to wear a hat at school. He would continue to wear a mask in case his face was recognized.
But there was something he forgot.
Her first days of school went without wearing lenses, so she easily drew attention. At least by those he spoke to several times in class.
In order not to make it seem even more awkward, he took the lenses out again, deciding to end the lens conversation so as not to attract attention.
Sighing, he adjusted his mask.
When black wavy hair was supplemented with eyes as dark as pitch and as bright as sky, even the mask could no longer obscure the Sss+ view. Even with the glasses, mask and hat completely covering his face, he had the feeling of being remarkable somehow, while people looked in silence at how charisma even a mask was.
***
"Shura, how were your school days?" She had heard that her sister also felt the need to hide because she was once the target of the rebel group called Urmalin, and she kept going to school like that.
He couldn't help but ask.
"Of course, no uglier make-up could hide my perfect look. She loved my beauty looking at this precautionary make-up under the mask(!)"
Yun "..."
"I mean, it was hard work being liked by everyone... I didn't have to do anything to be popular(!)"
Shura spoke solemnly.
Yun shook his head, covering his face with his hand. He should have guessed that he shouldn't have asked her.
***
Sitting in the back row, he silently looked at the troubled crowd in front of him.
One day, he really never expected this day to come. He couldn't hope.
Now that I think about it, time seemed to pass so quickly that for a moment, it took all of its troubles and troubles with it.
Even involuntarily, his eyes turned red and misted.
He is the type of person who will harden his heart the most when everything is against him, he hates to admit it, even if he is clearly weak, and acts as if mercury, not blood, runs through his veins.
He tortures himself as if he forgets that his body is made of bone and meat, and he uses this body with contempt as if he were going to die.
These times, he couldn't imagine these moments even in his deepest dreams. Once you started to desire, greed would arise and make your famine even more unbearable.
All her pathetic struggles and efforts to free herself from the mess she was up to her neck tried with the certainty that it would all be futile in the end.
She was a loser in life, and she was desperately aware that she would never be a winner.
So close your heart, make an iron bar and brace it with chains.
Don't worry, you are tired now, but you will rest in eternal sleep anyway...
Stand up straight and don't bend your bruised back even if it hurts, don't you dare!
Suppress your emotions, they are just obstacles at this stage and here. Listen!
Ignore! Seeing!
Beware! Don't look back, the moment you stop you will give up, when you stop you will realize the miserable state of your body numb with pain...
Move forward, blindly move forward, like an apathetic, don't know...you don't need to know.
Don't worry, when everything falls into place and is as it should be, you will be given a chance to stop as soon as your existence has no meaning.
And then you will be blessed with eternal peace and silence.
You will be crowned with the graceful crown of death...
When he first came into this body… strangely, the joy of life was not the first thing that crossed his mind. If he was here, who was the real owner of the body? Did she kill him? Was his existence predicated on someone else's death? So what was the use of such a goddamn life? He has no family, no one, no purpose, no wish, no hope...
SUCH A FUCKING LIFE! THIS DAMN BEING! WHY IS A rotten soul thrown into the depths of an unknowable HELL? WHY IS THIS SOUL DRESSED IN A BODY, WHO ALREADY HAS A DETERMINED BODY?
It was strangely comforting that this place was fiction and that his body was a soulless empty shell, a corpse, even if it was a man.
A FICTION? FICTION! WAS HE ALREADY JUMPED TO BRING THE PLACE HERE AGAINST YOUR DISEASED SOUL?
On the verge of insanity and suicide, a hope was tied. NO, IT WAS ATTACHED TO THE NECK AS A POWDER LIKE A ROPE. IT WAS A DOG AND HE HAS A LEASH.
Even knowing this, he tried desperately.
Purpose… when it was his only excuse to cling to life… it shattered his already devastated soul even more. He tortured himself relentlessly and advanced, knowing that the end would be destruction.
He was very tired of everything, of everyone and of all time. He was more reluctant than ever. He wanted to quit and give up. He cannot think or desire as he pleases, otherwise a backlash will destroy everything.
I HAVE A FAMILY, I AM HAPPY. I AM HAPPY... WATCHING THEIR HAPPINESS, I AM HAPPY...
Is she happy? I am tired...
I want to confess. Even my own soul is a burden to me, I can't carry it anymore. Leave me alone, I want silence. I want to disappear, I want that peace of absence...
Maybe I'm in revolt, maybe I'm in my puberty late... But I'm not well, I'm not well at all.
"Yun? Are you okay?"
"Yeah mom" didn't know that a smile could be so heavy as she even lifted the corner of her lips.
I'M FINE. Bandage your wounds while no one sees. I'M FINE. Scream, scream when no one can hear. I'M FINE. Cry when no one is there. I'M FINE. CRY! SHOUT! SAY! GIVE UP! And then... don't stop, keep going. Objectives...until you complete them...keep going...
His only motivation was to brainwash himself and convince himself that he would ultimately get nothing but pain. Still, from an objective point of view, a victim was essential to this event.
WAS THIS FICTION'S BAD, NO NO, ITS DOG ALREADY? It will bark at whoever its owner points to, and bites whoever shows it. BEING A VICTOR SHOULD NOT BE HARD. he thought. It shouldn't be difficult...
Thoughts overwhelmed him with his presence more than anything else.
What was the meaning of life if life was hell?
No no don't think, just move on. Blindfolded, step into a blind future! Maybe the end of this ascent was the abyss, but stopping was never the solution.
Forward! Maybe to freedom, maybe to darkness, or to light... Rather than drowning where you stand, suffocating faster, yes, maybe speeding up your death in a way.
Good or bad. It does not dare to love, it does not dare to see, it does not dare to desire.
His vision was completely blurred. Why did he suddenly recall these painful memories?
When he came to, his face was already soaked. A long silence with an incessant stream of warmth in his eyes.
Silence ?
In this crowded classroom?
When he looked up, he was surprised to see that almost the entire class—including the school's professors—had gathered around him.
"Xue... are you okay?"
The handkerchief and watermelon stretched out, tender hearts surrounded her, and this time there were no people making fun of her weeping like a girl.
A bitterness parted his chapped and dry lips and answered.
"Yup"
He was so used to it that he automatically replied to this answer. Then he didn't stop.
Maybe he wasn't supposed to be that strong anymore? After all, power wasn't just something that was acquired... moreover, people are social beings and their reason for living until this time by increasing the survival rate even in nature was their social norms, sort of... agh what does he think again?
"Xue are you really okay?"
She pursed her lips and felt her eyes dazzle even more.
"No"
He replied in a hoarse voice.
No, I'm not well.
Maybe the trouble of the past still felt its bondage even now.
He relaxed his shoulders and sighed, thinking he needed to relax.
Moreover, when she was a person who didn't even enjoy crying, let alone crying in front of everyone... she didn't even realize when she was crying... agh! Let go and relax! Her muscles twitched, she.
He stared silently at the water at a stretch of mist in front of him.
Yes, he realized that he seriously needed some good relaxation.
He reached for the bottle and noticed his trembling hands as he took it.
He sighed lightly...it wasn't that bad actually...haaah, who is he kidding? Indeed, he must have been so badly affected by these events that in the end such a simple stimulus had easily made him vulnerable and collapsed.
She swallowed and, with her crackling voice, gracefully lowered the mask to ease her aching throat.
He put the bottle to his lips and relaxed his shoulders, feeling that even his heart was relieved for a moment when he drank the ice-cold water. It took a short time for him to take off his glasses with the handkerchief given to him right after, wipe the condensed glasses first, place them on the table, and then wipe his face and take a deep breath and put them back on. He lifted his head and smiled sincerely, with a feeling of relief like never before.
"Thanks"
In fact, it was admirable maturity that even those who taunt him were so careful at this sensitive time. But he wasn't thinking about that right now.
All he could think about was that everyone in the class was staring at him, literally forgetting to breathe.
Yun "???"
Yun "Huh?"
"Ahhh! Oh my god, what was that mask covering!" With a girl shouting and screaming in excitement, Yun stood as if sitting in thorn milk, and immediately noticed the mask in his hand.
He hadn't thought about it while drinking water, but...
Yun "..."
Maybe he just overlooked a huge problem.
-To be continued-