Actually, I don't agree with my marriage with Fatimah, but what about a family trust that I have to fulfill at this time. All this as penance for my mother who once gave pain to this family. I am impossible to abdicate that responsibility and all the promises.
I can only sit quietly staring at every corner of my room. She is indeed my wife but I can't touch her at all. It feels so hard to do something without even love.
I started to move from my king Then I stood looking at the sky from my bedroom window. My feelings feel empty even though I already have a legal life partner in front of Allah alone.
In my heart and mind, there are still images of that city girl that are still pervading my soul. "Is it possible that I can love her with a sense of familiarity?"
