Claire
It had been a week since I was captured. Seven days since we lost our baby. The heart ache was still ever present, the nightmares all consuming. I hadn't slept more than a few hours at a time, barely eaten anything despite Alaina's repeated attempts. She and Celeste had been back every day to check on us, to help us in any way they could. While their care and friendship was appreciated, it did little to alleviate the constant ache in my chest where the love for our baby still burns.
Rowan had not been back.
I hadn't seen or talked to him since he flew away with that man. I had tried to mind link him a million times, but his block is always up. Bennett told me he is at the council headquarters in the cellar with the man. That he is paying for his atrocities.
I don't care.
I don't care about any of it.
Nothing Rowan does to that man will bring our baby back. And every moment he spends away from us only adds to the rage building inside of me. For the life of me, I can't figure out what his reasoning is. Finally, I get fed up with it and storm from the house, my fury fueling my feet towards the building I know my other mate is in.
Bennett follows me, full of concern and trying to talk me out of it, but I ignore him.
"He's just processing it differently, Claire." He tries to reason with me but I just growl at him.
"It's unacceptable, Bennett! Never have we gone this long without seeing him since I've been marked. Who is he to think he can just abandon us?" I shout and Bennett sighs, running his fingers through his hair.
"Baby, you're just going to piss him off. Please don't make it worse. He wouldn't want you anywhere near this place." He pleads but I cut him off with a firm glare as I stomp up the stairs to the headquarters.
"I don't care if I make him mad. Him screaming at me is better than him fucking ignoring us! He's not the only one who lost a child. We all did. And we need each other to grieve and heal. He is a part of us. Don't pretend you haven't been suffering by his absence too." I say and he shrugs.
"Of course I have, but I learned a long time ago that sometimes Rowan deals with things differently. I don't know what you're walking into and I don't want him to say something harsh that will upset you even more." He says and I shrug as I practically fly down the stairs leading to the dingy cellar.
"I don't care, Bennett. Enough is enough." I say as I push open the door that leads to the cells. I can feel Rowan's presence and know I'm getting close. Every one of my senses is assaulted by this place. The smell of piss, blood and earth. The sounds of screaming and crying. The freezing cold temperature making my body shiver. I walk down the long hallway and look in through the small window. I see Rowan sitting by himself at a table, his hands curled into fists as he stares at nothing.
"You're on your own with this one, Claire." Bennett says, looking at me anxiously before his eyes flit back to Rowan.
"That's fine. I'll can handle whatever he throws at me, but I can't handle being left to deal with this without him. It's the cruelest thing he's ever done." I admit, my voice hitching as I swallow down more tears. Bennett simply nods and walks back down the hallway away from me.
I push open the door and slam it shut behind me. This catches Rowan's attention and his eyes snap up to me. His brows furrow in confusion before a scowl takes over his face.
"What the fuck are you doing down here, Claire? This is not somewhere you should be." He says firmly. I roll my eyes and cross my arms over my chest.
"This isn't where you should be either, Rowan." I spit at him. He growls a little and stands so fast his chair falls over backwards.
"What are you talking about?" He asks and I take a step towards him.
"You shouldn't be here, Rowan! You should be with us. But you just left us. Abandoned us to pick up the pieces all by ourselves. You're so fucking selfish! How dare you do this to Bennett and I! We fucking needed you and you weren't there. Just ignored us every time we asked for you. Why? Why were you able to do that? Do we mean so little to you? Or are you angry at me? That I didn't save him? That I couldn't fight that man off?" I scream, my voice wobbling with emotion. Rowan looks shocked at my outburst, but I don't let that stop me.
"I tried, Rowan! I swear I did. I fought. I fought so hard and the only reason I did was for him. I'm so sorry I couldn't save him. You know I loved him, that I wanted him." My sobs break free and I fall to my knees in front of him, lowering my head as tears run down my face. "I'm so sorry I failed you." I whisper through my cries. I hear Rowan's haggard breathing, but everything else stays silent until he finally speaks.
"You're sorry? Claire. You have no reason to be sorry. This is all my fault. What you went through, the fact that our son is dead, it's my fault." He says evenly before lowering himself to his knees in front of me. He takes my face in his hands and I cry again at how good it feels for him to touch me after so long. I reach out and put my palm against his chest and lift my eyes to meet his. They are full of unshed tears as the face of a broken man stares back at me.
"How can you even stand to be in the same fucking room with me, Claire? I killed Damon. If I hadn't been such a possessive asshole this never would have happened." His voice is thick with guilt and sorrow and I would do anything to make it go away.
"It's not your fault. It's that man's fault. He killed our baby. Not you. But you are making it worse." I say quietly and he let's out a deep sigh.
"I thought you and Bennett would hate me. Blame me. I thought I was doing you a favor staying away from you." He admits and I shake my head fervently.
"No, Rowan. We need you. We need your strength. Your love. We can't..." I stop to swallow the knot in my throat before continuing. "We can't heal from this if we're missing a piece of ourselves." I say pleadingly. I watch his shoulders shake as the emotion becomes too much for him. He leans forward and wraps his arms around me. I do my best to hold him up as he cries into my shoulder. I run my fingers through his hair, planting kisses along his face. I'm not sure how long we stay like that until Rowan takes a few deep breaths and looks at me through red rimmed eyes. I wipe away the tear tracks on his cheeks and give him a sad smile.
"He saved you, you know." He says quietly and I look at him confused.
"What do you mean?" I ask. Rowan brings his hand out slowly, cradling my now flat stomach.
"His body couldn't process the gold so it... accumulated in his system. He pulled it from your body. So it didn't effect you as much. So you could fight back. He saved you." He sobs again and fresh tears stem from my own tired, sore eyes.
"I'm still here, baby. And I need you. Please come home with us. Please." I beg him and he nods, standing up and lifting me in his arms, crushing me against him.
"I'm so sorry, little one. I thought you'd hate me. I couldn't take it, having you and Bennett despise me. It would hurt too much." He admits quietly. I sigh and hold him tight, relishing in being in his arms.
"The only way we could be mad at you is if you stay away. I need you. I need you." I repeat to him and he nods as if finally understanding.
He carries me out of the room and Bennett's eyes widen in surprise when he sees us. He hurries over to us and throws his arms around us both. I smile and watch as Bennett kisses Rowan.
"I'm so sorry, love." Rowan tells him firmly. I don't doubt a word of what he's said and neither does Bennett based on the smile on his face. It's the first real one I've seen in a week.
"It's alright. We'll always be here for you. We love you." Bennett says sweetly. Rowan looks between the two of us, nothing but devotion on his face.
"I don't know why I was blessed with the two of you. I know I don't deserve either of you, but I will spend all of eternity loving you, cherishing you and letting you know how grateful I am." He says passionately and we all stand in a firm embrace before Rowan carries me back to the house, Bennett following closely.
When Rowan sets me down in the entry way, I look around the house and feel nothing but contempt.
"I don't want to stay here anymore, Rowan. It doesn't feel like home." I say sadly. I look up at him and he nods with a sad smile.
"You're right. I think we should go back to our real home." He says, pulling my hand out to the front yard. I watch as he shifts into his beautiful cobalt dragon.
"Are we going where I think we're going?" I ask and Rowan nods his large head. I smile up at Bennett and he looks positively giddy. Bennett helps me climb on Rowan's back and holds onto me tight.
"Let's go home!" I yell and Rowan takes flight, back to the place where it all began.