Having finished my session, I find myself outside the computer cafè staring at nothing. I didn't feel like going back home yet.
It's weird, isn't it? Some people are actually quite interested in how porn actresses date.
Thankfully, Alaya hasn't shown her face yet. She always either wears a facemask or her face is just out of shot. It's one of the trademarks of her videos, as some people have said. That, and her "quirky" and "gamer" way of talking on the videos.
Always saying things like "Oh, is that how tiny your dick is LOL." Frankly, I found it a massive turn-off, saying online acronyms, that is. But hey, she's got a decent following. So clearly, I'm the wrong one here. Though, I'm guessing that's gotta do with her usually snarky attitude turning submissive later on.
I did hear there was an untapped market for vanilla domination. Surprised someone professional hasn't gotten big off it yet.
But moving back to the dating thing, it's interesting how some people wish they could date an actress. Always saying things like how they'd be a killer in bed when, in reality, a lot of them are tired of sex. I'm only speaking from experience here but Alaya and I rarely have sex. Maybe others are different, but she gets enough of that just from her job.
But where does that leave me? That's the problem. I don't actually get turned on watching my girlfriend have sex, I want to be the one having sex with her. But with her constantly being tired of it, I don't bother asking anymore.
Why don't I just ask? Because it's weird. Our entire relationship is very weird.
"Maybe it's time to have that talk..." I say to myself as I make my way home.
45 minutes later, I go through the back entrance of the apartment building. With how I always enter through the back entrance, I swear some of my neighbors think I'm some squatter.
Thankfully, our room is the very first door you'll see if you go through the back entrance.
Opening the door to our apartment, I spot my girlfriend sleeping on the massive beanbag we had. She had her cat onesie on.
Looking at her like this, I couldn't help but find her cute. My girlfriend wasn't what you would call the prettiest or the hottest, but she was definitely one of the cutest.
She had pink hair formed into a long bob cut and sunset-colored eyes. She was shorter than most people and her breasts were somewhat flat. But touching her, you could feel the softness of her skin and how silky smooth it was.
I would probably be blessed to have her as a girlfriend if it wasn't for our job.
Should I really have this talk? Caressing her hair, I try to rationalize our relationship.
=-=-=-=-=
Slowly opening my eyes, I let out a long yawn before noticing that I fell asleep sitting on the beanbag.
"Morning, Ayato!" Alaya greets with a bubbly tone.
Pulling out my phone, I turn it on. It was 4:30 PM.
"It's already late into the afternoon."
"Blah, time doesn't matter! Let's go and have some fun today!" she stated while putting a sideways peace sign over her eye.
"...I'd rather not."
Standing up, I dust myself off.
"Not gonna stream today?" I ask.
"Nah, I'm pretty tired. Why were you home late, by the way? Did Mishi drop you off somewhere super far or something?"
"How'd you even know what time I arrived?"
"I don't. It's just that you took so long I fell asleep."
"Oh, sorry about that. Anyway, if you're tired, why do you wanna go out?"
Glancing back at her, she was pouting like a little child.
"I wanna spend time with you..."
Looking at her now, she reminded me of when we first met. How cute and adorable she was. Sometimes, I still think back to when she first suggested the idea of becoming an actress. I told her I'd support, no matter what happens. I guess you could say it was a rash decision from me.
Man, if I could go back in time, I would definitely tell myself to try and convince her otherwise. But now, it's practically our job. It's hard to get out of it when it's our only consistent way of getting money.
"Sorry, Alaya. Can I have some alone time today? I wanna stream something."
"You really wanna spend more time with your chat than me?"
I really didn't want to have an argument with her right now. I just want to have some time for myself today, there was no deeper meaning behind it. Despite me explaining that to her, she didn't budge.
She stormed out, isolating herself in her room.
This isn't the manliest thing to say but I've always hated her for doing this. You would think being a known porn actress, she'd realize how fragile her relationships are. But no, she's always been like this, constantly wanting my attention after we get home. She ignores me all the time on set. But every time I get home, she suddenly wants me to spend all my remaining time with her.
What the hell kind of selfish desire is that? You ignore me, but you want me to still enjoy our time together? Does she think I enjoy seeing her get fucked by another guy? When we haven't had sex in the past three months? What the fuck does she want me to do? Bow down and just go with everything she wants?
I wanted to punch her door, but I held myself back. I shouldn't make this a bigger problem than it has to be. Just another lover's quarrel, as some would say. Only one of the many we've had...and will have.
Walking over to my room, I've lost all motivation for streaming. I lie there on my bed, blankly staring at the ceiling, knowing that this will probably happen all over again tomorrow.