The girls were scheduled to meet at five o'clock in the evening near the courtyard outside the restaurant where they often went on weekends. As expected, they arrived ten minutes early, because they had respect for not rushing each other.
Soon after buying themselves a coffee, they sat down on a bench. The courtyard was deserted and clean, which gave comfort to the eyes, but the gray tones of the cold weather made them feel bored.
"Yuttyan, have you ever had any trouble in your studies?"
"Ah, no... I've been good at school since elementary school, school subjects were easy for me. I loved geography most of all, because I made sure I was interested in the countries and our planet as a whole."
"Do you... like to travel?"
"Of course! Now imagine the overhead vistas that we would only see in our dreams — well, they really exist! I would like to see with my own eyes the tall skyscrapers of Dubai, and to visit the Alps... I think my interests overlap with my desire for freedom, because learning about the world and seeing the beauty of wild nature with my own eyes can bring me a true sense of euphoria. Think about it — you are in the mountains, and when you approach a slope, you can see the whole earth, as if you are floating on clouds! You can shout whatever you want and enjoy life, because no one will hear... Isn't that real freedom?"
"Ah, I guess so."
"I want to be abroad and feel the passion of things unfamiliar to my eye!"
Akiko was surprised and smugly added: "Then I want to go with you. Anywhere, but I won't stop following you! With you to visit the mountains and look at the skyscrapers..."
"Attyan...?"
"Let's run away together wherever we can see! Just you and me, and no one else. I am sure that you will lead us to prosperity and beauty, so I too place my hope in you and carry our common burden with you. Let us escape, Yuttyan, from this earth."
Yumiko shuddered, and, looking at Akiko's confident gaze, read her words emphatically, uttered without an ounce of regret.
'But you can't do that... You'd be running away from yourself and relying on me alone...'
"Attyan, but that is impossible. Living other people's dreams won't lead to any prosperity. What is it that you... really want?"
Akiko silently placed her palms on her feet and lowered her eyes.
"That's how..." she said, depressed.
"Tell me, please! Attyan, what's troubling you?"
Akiko, not to upset her beloved friend, smiled nonetheless:
"How can I refuse when you ask for it so much... You know, if you said yes, I'd really rather disappear from this world with you. Yutian..."
Yumiko would not turn away from caring for the friend she valued most in life, so she decided to do the brave thing for her — she put her hand on Akiko's folded arms.
"Tell me, and I will surely help you! I'll be at your side, I'll protect you from everything, I'll move mountains for my friend! Please tell me how you feel."
"How could I say no to my Yuttyan? I... all this time I have been helpless, but I have grasped for you... always. Yuttyan, I am grateful to you and I want our friendship to be permanent... Every time I think about the possibility that we will all stop seeing each other in the future, I shudder. I don't know how to hold back my tears, and I've never tried to be independent. I've always held on to strong people. Yuttyan, I'm helpless, but when I'm around all of you I feel so much better...!"
"We've all lived to the point... where we can't be without each other," Yumiko thought to herself. "I'm not the only one who's become addicted to them... Except that they, my friends, it's as if they've stopped doing something about it. If this continues, sooner or later..."
"Attyan, when you called me, I could feel the sadness in your voice. You didn't seem so depressed before... Did something bad happen?"
"Eh, it's true, I've really started to get sad more often lately. Yuttyan, it's just that my emotions that I've been holding back lately have manifested... and today's manifestation was today."
'The same with me. Yuttyan always seemed to be an optimistic person, but she also harbors a lot of excitement...'
"Yuttyan. To tell you the truth, I don't know what I want to be in the future. More than that, I don't even know where I'm going to go or what subjects I'm going to choose. Then I told Glenn about it, after which he showed me mercy... I knew I was helpless, and inherently unable to rely on my own strength, but today... Glenn-kun asked me to rely on him. He wants to help me tighten up my knowledge before exams and entrance exams, and it's only, like, two months until the last recess... What a fool, always hanging on by a thread, but even this way he wants to help a talentless girl like me so that I can learn something..."
"I think that's just the way he is by nature, and nobody can change that."
"And then I realized, once again, that I had come to rely on someone. Glenn-kun... he's so naive and always reaching up, how could I say no to him...? He's decided to waste his time on me, isn't he?"
Yumiko, who was listening to her frankness, noticed a strange movement in Akiko's fingers, accompanied by awkwardness and slight nervousness.
"Glenn-kun is kind... and always pulls people up, he gives off a nice vibe. Pleasant, but sometimes infuriating with his honesty... Attractive and knows how to choose his words correctly, which makes people have confidence in him and trust him. I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks this, he must have plenty of good people around him. He stands out among other people and doesn't seem like a fake person... Yuttyan, he really is that special, isn't he?"
Yumiko was slightly puzzled by her strange question.
"Glenn-kun seems to be very special just for you."
"I see. So I'm not the only one who's sure of that... Doesn't he also seem to have a sibling in the family? Studying abroad, she must be cute... I'd like to meet her. Whenever I think of his little sister, I immediately think of him!"
Yumiko lost the gist of the conversation, after which she seemed misunderstood.
"You think it's weird, too?" Akiko said. "That's what I think. After talking to him, I realized something, as if I'd finally found what I'd been missing the most in my life. Yuttyan, have you ever had those feelings? You know, the kind that stabs you right in the heart. Called love."
Yumiko completely lost her composure upon hearing her question and what she had said earlier.
"Ah... Well, it's not really like that, but I...guess I'm not sure about this, but... Why are you asking such embarrassing questions?!"
Akiko giggled happily: "We are best friends, after all. It's perfectly normal when the subject is brought up. And you seem incomparably cuter when you're shy about such questions, and when you blush and start picking up words awkwardly and seem even more charming, and when you frown... How could you not have a boyfriend? With a temper like yours, I'm sure any guy would do anything to be with you."
"Attyan, it's not so easy for me to communicate... To tell you the truth, I've never wanted a love relationship. They seem meaningless to me myself, and I hardly ever fell in love with anyone..."
"Don't joke like that! Of course you were in love, but if you think that way you hide your feelings from everyone, it might mean that you've been hiding them deep inside you!"
"You're right... How could you even determine that?"
Akiko chuckled again.
"It's all because we're friends and we see right through each other."
Yumiko was finally convinced that she could rely on her friend. In everything. It amazed her how Akiko could tell her by her mannerisms, eye expression, and tone of voice. It seemed to brown-eyed that Akiko knew even more about her than she did herself.
"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I really don't want a love relationship. It's more than two months until graduation and exams start. I won't put off my studies, because I'm already a little weary of my schedule... Don't think you're to blame for that, not at all, I'm happy when I spend my time with you... but about love affairs I must forget... It takes a lot of time that I could spend on education."
"Is that why you say no to boyfriends in relationships?"
"Love is distracting. All thoughts start floating around one person, and your head gets filled with things you hadn't thought about before. I used to not want any communication at all, but by getting used to you I was able to change myself and my opinion of the world, and now I want to settle down with all of you, but I am beginning to realize that I spend more time on things besides studying... Attyan, my dream is to strive for a bright future, which I want to build with my own hands, and only studying and our friendships will help me in that, but no more..."
Time was indeed of the utmost importance to Yumiko, and in her circumstances, to think of anything else during the last months of her studies was tantamount to self-denial. Akiko could relate to this, for spending time on things that would in no way help one's life becomes nothing more than a lump of garbage, degenerating consciously.
"Yuttyan, I believe you. All you have to do is ask, and I'll rush to you for help, okay? Don't forget, because you're not alone."
'Yuttyan, you forget about yourself and start deciding for others, strictly in their best interests. Selfishness it is or its opposite, sooner or later you may burn out.'
"Please be there for us. Ask me anything you want, but don't forget that you're not alone... I love you, Yutyan, with all my soul, so I don't want you to stop moving toward your dreams... I can just follow you, but I'm sure I'm doing it consciously and I don't mind it at all."
Yumiko was impressed by her bitter words, but disagreed with her.
'It's not right. You have to move your own way and decide for yourself... But it's so sweet... Please forgive me for not being able to tell those words out loud, forgive me.'
"Yuttyan! Are you crying?"
Yumiko suddenly realized that the tears had started pouring out of her without her knowledge, so she wiped them away.
"It's all right. What about your love for Glenn? What are you going to do next?"
"Ah...that's true. I'm not going to do anything. I think he can handle himself, and all I have to do is wait...!"
"Are you sure you can take it?"
"No, I can't stand it. Yuttyan, you should know what was going on inside me then when he was drawn to me...without any other context, of course. I don't think I can take it, but I'll try hard."
"I mean, he's still going to have to mess around with you...teach you basic junior high school knowledge."
"I'm not that stupid at all!" Akiko pouted. "Besides, I'll be learning on my own outside of Glenn-kun's gaze. It won't be forever for me to rely on him and hand over the whole load..."
Soon they were talking about little things in their own style, eventually ending the topic on a note that was pleasant to both of them. As they fell silent, they heard the rustling of tree branches and felt the breeze accompanied by a fragrant chill.
"Tomorrow there will be a celebration of the new year..." Yumiko stated peacefully.
"Yes, together," Akiko contentedly said. Continuing to sit on the bench, they both held hands.