"So you knew beforehand…"
They were sitting on a bench in a nearby park. Tomoyuki hung his nose, looking at Ryou, pondering to himself some thoughts about the consequences.
"Yes," Akiko replied. "We guessed that you would pull something that not only you, but all of us together, would regret. But guns… That was too irresponsible of you, and where did you get it anyway!"
"It doesn't matter where he got the weapon," Ryou said, averting his eyes to the side. "It's already gone. It's the other thing that matters now."
"You knew beforehand that I had lied to you, and you chose to turn a blind eye… But for what… to turn a blind eye to the terrible things I've done?"
"People are not supposed to know what will happen in the future," Akiko responded. "I understand you, for I have had to be desperate myself."
"Impossible, no one can understand me."
"I understand. Tomoyuki-kun, how can I not know how my friend feels? Even though I didn't quite understand what you were really up to, I can understand all the difficulties you went through."
Tomoyuki realized their closeness. Unequal affection and affection for each other was a factor in their mutual friendship, which Tomoyuki had rejected for so long.
"But still, where did you get the weapon?"
"I've had it since long ago, as circumstances have lapsed. You don't have to worry, I haven't used it… It has to do with a past that I have no intention of remembering."
Tomoyuki slumped his shoulders as his whole body trembled.
"You don't have to tell," Yumiko, who was sitting next to him, reassured him.
Ryou, standing by the bench, uttered:
"We'll just have to settle for the fact that you're not dead."
"Ryou-kun, stop fooling around!"
"Akiko-chan, this isn't fooling around at all. It doesn't compare to what lies on the surface now! Our friendship…has been nothing but a deception all along."
Yumiko was certainly capturing his feelings, having been in the dark until the last moment. She lowered her lashes, but dared to reveal her emotions as well.
"I have known for a long time that you were hiding something… Whether or not you wanted to harm us, I couldn't know for sure. Come to think of it, I didn't want to believe any of this, I had hopes that you would come to your senses sooner."
Ryou, upset, didn't dare ask when she found out.
"After all, Tomoyuki-kun wanted to stop from the beginning, didn't he?" Yumiko asked with a warm smile to comfort the astonished Tomoyuki. "You wouldn't have otherwise made a scene right outside the club window. I saw the whole thing at that moment. Did you think then that I might be the one to stop you?"
She was referring to the moment from her spring school days when Tomoyuki was blackmailing Akiko behind the school.
"Doomed to suffer deserves no good… My actions are unforgivable."
"You're wrong, Tomoyuki-kun," Akiko said, comfortingly. "We can start with a clean slate. There's no need to hide anything else."
"Show all the cards," the young man added, "and life will be easier."
Yumiko agreed and quietly said she forgave them. But Ryou dared not end his troubling problem on that note — he sought the truth on which his future relationship to others depended.
"I was the only one who walked in ignorance… Our whole fellowship, pastime, and promise…was built on one lie. It is impossible to forgive this, for you promised not to lie anymore! But why do I see that you didn't give a damn about those promises…?"
"Ryou-kun…"
"How can I believe now that you are not lying to us now? There's no way to make sure your emotions are real!"
"Please listen to us!" Akiko retorted with a concerned look. "We're very sorry…that you had to go through this, but please let us answer all your questions!"
Lowering his head, he clenched his hands into a fist.
"I can't think of anything to ask…"
And then Tomoyuki ventured to tell from the start what was behind the scenes and what his views were.
"I forced Akiko-chan to settle accounts with Yumiko-chan. Subjected to blackmail, she agreed, having deliberate nagging at you. You announced to the school for the first few days that you had started dating, didn't you? That rumor didn't get past our ears, though we didn't communicate about the subject. Akiko-chan didn't like that you went along with it, so I decided to use her."
Yumiko, puzzled, asked Akiko how much she hated her
"I was subject to my ideals… I'm sorry, Yumiko-chan. I didn't tell anyone before, but I hated love couples who were popular and damaged their relationships many times. But after I found out you were a pretend couple, I..."
"You couldn't take the anger…"
"It was my stupid, rotten ideals that guided me. But when I saw you, Yumiko-chan, the real you, I repented…"
"It's all right. I can relate because you were driven by what you thought was right. No one has the right to judge you."
"Initially I was looking for reasons," the blue-eyed man added. "I had an aversion to you all, including Akiko-chan, for I knew that you walked around with a mask on your face. You were not real, running away from yourselves, and that was the ground of my hatred. Ryou-kun seemed like a silent hypocrite to me, looking down on people, and Yumiko-chan was a person who profited from other people's popularity. Akiko-chan, on the other hand, had been hated by me for a long time, far back in the past we had met her. She was no different from the faceless dolls that abounded."
"How much hatred have you kept within yourself," Yumiko lowered her lashes grimly, "and never told anyone. It pains me to know that I have made such an impression on you…"
"But in trying to understand you, I turned out to be wrong about everything. Yumiko-chan, who looked silent on the outside, turned out to be the purest person I had ever seen in my life. Akiko-chan at one time admitted that she wouldn't hurt anyone else. And Ryou-kun, who told us about his past, began to seem more open and honest. I was wrong about every single thing I thought was right."
"Why didn't you stop then?" Ryou asked. "Where did your fierce desire to harm us come from?"
"Atonement. Every sin has its consequences, no matter how great. A man must be met with retribution in atonement for his sins according to the problem he created…"
"Don't be ridiculous! Is that what you believed?"
"I could not stop, for I had reached the point of no return, nor was I forgiven. I had committed such sins that I should have been considered a scumbag, a bastard."
"If you seriously believe this nonsense, let me be clear: you are wrong about that conclusion as well. There is no point of no return or anything else you have imagined. All that drove you was an unwillingness to accept the truth. You've been circling your own friend!"
"But it's my fault, too!" Akiko retorted. "We're sorry for everything we've done. Tomoyuki-kun and I are ready for any punishment, aren't we, Tomoyuki-kun? Any punishment! Just please…don't cut our ties. You are so dear to us…"
Ryou looked at them thoughtfully, as if recalling all the events they had experienced together.
"Ryou-kun, be sure Akiko-chan hasn't done anything to hurt me or you," Yumiko said.
"I have nothing against Akiko-chan. I should take a break. Get my thoughts together after such betrayals."
Tomoyuki softly retorted, asking for his forgiveness, to which Ryou stated that he needed to think about it alone.
"Unlike Akiko-chan, you were strongly aiming to hurt. By putting us together, you intended to humiliate our dignity, and especially that of Akiko-chan."
He correctly noted. Tomoyuki had originally given Yumiko the excuse to call both Ryou and Akiko into the literary circle in order to bring them into the same circle. That way, it was easier for him to manipulate them, but Glenn's presence spoiled all his plans.
Akiko looked at him grudgingly.
"What else can I say?" Ryou answered her, astonishing them. "I'm just saying what we're all thinking! Isn't that a normal reaction to events? How can I rethink the whole damn thing in one day…?"
Yumiko agreed and heeded Ryou's point, adding that they all need to get their heads together and think with a clear mind.
"Don't think about anything else bad, Tomoyuki-kun. Ryou-kun will surely forgive you, just give us some time."
"Don't you dare do that kind of thing to yourself again!" grudgingly expressed Akiko. "We made a promise to each other to stick together side by side."
"A promise…" Tomoyuki heated up, remembering the day they made each other a promise. "Thank you so much…"
He intertwined his fingers tightly:
"I'll be sure to return the favor… Thank you for accepting me with open arms… Thank you for not being disappointed in me. I will change. For your sake, I will become a better version of myself!"
"You're an idiot, Tomoyuki-kun," Ryou averted his gaze, clearly not intending to offend. "Just be yourself. The one we used to spend time with, the Tomoyuki who is the real you."
"Whatever misfortunes you try to pin on us, we love the very idiot who gave us happiness."
Yumiko tried to appear more confident to shine that light on Tomoyuki.
"Now you'll have to work hard to make us happy again," Ryou added.
"I'm sorry… sorry."
"Don't be sorry, crybaby!"
'I simply couldn't understand the simple things,' Tomoyuki thought to himself, 'inherent in my friends. All this time… I wasn't alone? All this time. My life turned out to be the brightest.'
From the days that followed, the blue-eyed young man was willing to change himself by the sweat of his brow. To shake off the stigma and accept himself for who he was, he was determined to show only the best side of himself.
But Ryou and Yumiko needed time to forget the adversity and the event. After all, their friend intended to go to the other world. Therefore, it was important for Akiko and Tomoyuki to regain their trust. At least they thought that this trust had been lost, but it had not. They began their communication with a clean slate.
Time, a merciless thing, does not worry about all hardships. It only strives forwards, carelessly erasing the past and burdening people with acts. According to time, nothing is eternal.
Nothing is eternal. Relationships, friendships, life. At the end of time, everything will become insignificant, as it will fade into oblivion. Those who have succeeded will be rewarded, and those who have failed will be left to their own devices.
Everything is temporary.