ISABELLE.
"You can't can you?" He added, his heat causing spasms in my belly, my gaze focused on the bookshelf by the side where I busied my attention for some time now unable to look into his piercing and smothering gaze. "Then get used to it, get ready for it. I am sure by the end of the month we will be married so get ready."
"You can't expect me to just believe that you love your family so much to marry me, after everything I did, it goes against everything you believe in. Try as you may, I see the hesitance and anger in your words as if they are staring right at me." I manage when the proximity between us has increased enough for me to collect my thoughts. He pauses, the tension in his muscles evident as he stiffens, I was right. I am right.
"What do you think you even know?" He says, his back still turned towards me.
"And Sabine? Is she okay with this as well, is she just willing to let you go like that?"
"Why do you keep bringing up her name? Why does she keep popping up in our conversations?!" That's it, that is the agitation I want to see but it doesn't feel right. Something is off and I need to find out what it is.
My body stiffens as a shiver dolls my senses for a moment, I step further delving into my search for answers. "Call it a woman's intuition but I know something is there. Is it a lie?"
"I don't understand what it is you want, the way you are acting it's frightening and dangerous. You have an ulterior motive deeper than what I can see right now, what is it?" He closes the distance between us once more but this time I am more prepared.
Facing him as he faced me that jolt, I felt it again. It overwhelmed my senses, my lungs filled up with strangeness and my ears tingled in alarm. My skin hummed and hummed with the proximity of him and I felt everything from a dizzying high. "The only thing you need to know is my utter despise for this engagement. I refuse to marry you Asher Quing."
His lips lifted in a half-smirk and he leaned forward, his soft words ruining everything I was working for. "Don't say that to me, tell that to your own family. Tell that to my family that worships you because you see miss Byun. I am just as desperate and as helpless as you are in this situation."
I can't reveal this, I can't let them see my desperation. Those people are demons that would feed on my hopelessness and use it to destroy me. Was I reborn for naught? I'm I still unable to defend myself as I should? Suddenly all I see soft black curls, a sweet innocent smile, and bright eyes that give a glimpse of the purest heart that exists in this world. That sultry and silky laugh that just rolls off one's skin like honey milk. The fire sparks and the desperation gives room to new determination. I won't give up not yet.
SABINE.
"I do understand that you were not at fault but you keep showing up in from of the old Madam and not in a good way." Mrs, Marisol Quing states, and I cannot help but pull my bottom lip into my mouth as I fumble around with my fingers. It is not my fault… then I shouldn't be punished. I wouldn't have to be in this situation, even as I am scolded my thoughts run to those deceptive eyes. Bright and innocent but opposite underneath. Now after using me to make herself look good before everyone else it only backfired, Asher hates her guts and so do I.
Or did it? The engagement is still on, swallowing hard I lift my eyes to Mrs. Marisol, "it wouldn't be fair to fire you but the old Madam has to be appeased so you'll go to the pinnacle from now on."
This news… my throat constricts and I find it difficult to breathe. The world seems to stop around me for a moment and my eyes widen. Both arms fall to my sides and I find myself gripping the fabric of my skirt tighter than I should.
"How did it go? With the Madam? Are they going to fire you?" Carly asks as I walk into the staff's quarters.
"I'm getting transferred to the pinnacle."
"Really? Is that it? That's all no salary cuts or cancellations?" She asked and as I began to answer my phone buzzed in my pocket and with a raised finger I cut her off and answered it.
"Sebastian, what's up, is everything alright did something happen to grandma?"
"Hold your horses why do you just assume something is wrong?" My brother says through the phone and I excuse myself wordlessly and walk out of the room. "Well, you never call me so what I'm supposed to think?"
"Grandmother is just as grumpy as always…"
I nod in agreement, then she is fine "… Sabine, did you lend dad money?"
With furrowing brows, I wipe my palms on my skirt and frown, "why do you ask?"
******************************
My steps are hurried my hand beginning to burn from where the skin of my palm meets with the leather handle of my purse, lifting my wrist to take a look at my wristwatch for the fourth time in… well apparently the same minute why the hell is this taking so long? Finally away from the escalator I pick up the pace even more heading in a direction that causes me more and more hurt. I am only going to check, he isn't going to be there, I know it, I know it, I know…
"Dad" is unmistakable, I know that soft and wavy black hair anywhere, it was what existed on my own head. That massive expanse of full and untamed hair.
His eyes widen as they come in contact with mine and my skin bruin even more intensely as my grip tightens. A strong whiff of spirits and something putrid assault my senses and the air is thick and heavy with smoke. Laughter and shouts continue further adding their own form of pollution to the air and my body stiffens in a rigid stance.
"Oopsie looks like someone is in trouble here" one of the men sitting on the table littered with gambling chips and papers of money whistles at both my father and me, I recognize him. He looks even worse than the last time I saw him.
"Sabine, what are you doing here?"
"How could you? You are our father, you are my father! How dare you? After I told you what this money was for you come here again?"
"Look Sabine it is not what it looks like"
"Oh yeah? Then give it back right now, give it all back! You can't right? You can't! What would mom say if she saw you do this? Does my effort mean nothing? How dare you do this with the money I earned with so much pain?!" The words hotter than coal leave scalding burns on my insides as they spill out my lips with the explosive strength of fireworks and the destructive precision of bullets.
"This time is different I promise, look I am winning, I can do it Sabs, I can get it all back," My father says, grabbing onto my arm he looks into my eyes and I raise my head up and blink rapidly. My throat burning with a repressed sob, it is as if I have gone back in time, this always happens when would I learn. Looking back at him I notice the stubble all around his chin and the stains on his shirt. He has been here for days, throwing away my money. It is pointless to yell, honestly, it is. Pulling back my arm I stumble back a few steps, braving all the eyes that look towards my direction, some sympathetic most out of pity. Like I said I come here often. without another word I stumble out of the building, clutching my jacket around me unable to even make my dramatic exit with the strong winds and the torrents of rain, I fall to my knees and let the strong rumble of thunder carry my screams.