Ripped back into reality without a moment of notice I collapsed to my knees, my throat gagging trying to empty a stomach that contained not even bile. This wasn't real. No, it was just a bad dream, it had to be a bad dream.
S-so sick… my skin is so pale…
This was all just one very bad dream, all just one giant nightmare that'd I awake from in a cold sweat. Please, say it is so. Someone, anyone, say something. No one did, no one in that room or dream validated nor denied me. They just watched. I could feel them watching even if I could not see them. They were not real, this was not real.
My hands were shaking and my breathing had accelerated for the first time. The ground was so cold but my skin was colder. The stone tile was so dark yet my… my… claws were darker, pitch black and extending in points from my fingers. They were not real, this was not real.
My deep black hair, tangled and unkempt, fell into my eyes but I didn't care. All this was fake, an illusion built to torture me. The slow-paced beating of my heart, the darkness that I could see through like day. It was all fake. It was not real, this was not real.
"Wake up," I mumbled, raising my right hand and slamming it deep into the tile.
It gave just a little under the blow before the crumbs that had been pricked off rolled back and the tile put itself back together. My curled fist lacked that ability and deep red blood started to spurt from my palm as my pinky bent back at an unnatural angle. It hurt, oh it hurt so very much. No noise left my mouth though. Not even a small muffled cry of pain.
It isn't enough, this pain isn't enough. I need more!
My other fist joined in this time, continuing to assault the stone floor that put itself back together without the slightest hesitation. I wanted to leave, I needed to leave. To go home, to see my family. Let me leave, please just let me leave.
"L-Lord Vannagrash… shouldn't we h-help him." A light shaking feminine voice that didn't resemble either the blonde or Lady Rez asked, receiving a scoff from the other side of the room in response.
"Unfortunately we can't. This is what tends to happen to strays."
"B-B-But he's-"
"There is nothing to be done, child. Nothing you say or do can reverse what's been done to him or what's going through his mind right now. His fate is not one that can be helped by any other than himself."
Their conversation went in one ear and right out of the other. It was of no consequence to me, they were not real. My manic state frightened me but more so did the final subtle change that escaped my notice until now. A… hunger. Something I had noted in passing but had marked off as unimportant now felt so crucial to my existence. This hunger wasn't normal, I knew that immediately.
A sickness embedded within me, a lust for something not of my own making, like a second will had infested my body, urging me towards a desire.
"Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! This is a lie! A Falsehood! It's all just some wicked illusion or my mind playing tricks on me!"
My final resort was the most extreme as I discarded my broken hands twisted in unnatural angles and began to beat my forehead against the stone tile. The pain caused me to whimper back after the first try, falling on my behind unceremoniously. Trickling blood clouded my already shaking vision and I saw the other occupants of the room staring at me with a mixture of pity, empathy and disgust.
"Get away from me you monsters!" I screamed cowering into the closest column.
Apart from the amber haired boy and a brown-haired girl who hid behind him, none of those present seemed exactly bothered by the title of monster. The blonde swallowed back a little bit of distaste for me which fell short compared to the hurt and unsure look of both the taller boy and the girl quivering behind him.
"I'm not like you! I'm not a monster! I'm… I am…" My sentence stopped short as the final and perhaps most impactful misfortune fell upon me, like a bell signalling the call of cruel midnight.
My name was gone.
I didn't know how to describe it other than to say in plain terms that it just wasn't there.
The syllables and sounds, the inked letters bound together by the concept of a word, my singular and human designation, all of it had vanished. Taken away from me. Stolen.
Corrupted.
I slumped against the Column, gazing forward with a vacant and defeated expression. The final strokes of my less than stellar will to deny dissipating under the irrevocable truth.
…I'm a monster.
How or why didn't matter to me in that instance, only the choking feeling that something had been done to me that couldn't be undone. My mind felt blank.
"Now that's out of the way shall we continue on to why you are here? Needless to say, if you have any further belief that your sire is here or will be coming to take you under their wing, you are mistaken"
A deep grimace made its way onto the three who were more well informed and perhaps expecting that very thing before contorting into other expressions. The brunette was anxious, the amber head was angered, but the blonde… well she didn't seem to have a reaction.
Maybe she's quick on the uptake once it's spelled out so plainly.
I personally didn't have any reaction, I'd already lost so there wasn't any real point to get emotional over something I never expected in the first place. The only bonus to all this was the knowledge that I had, in fact, not been kidnapped. Yay.
Truthfully I felt so shit that most of what they were saying didn't register. They were vampires, I was a vampire. What happened next wouldn't change that so it didn't matter.
"So he left us? After doing all that grunt work for him at the prospect of a new life out of that fucking harbour, he just dropped us like a bag of horse shit."
"It would seem so."
"I… I don't get it, did we do something wrong? Was there some hiccup between this life and the next that made us insufficient?"
Lord Vannagrash didn't strike me as the kind of man that was amused by others suffering, but from this display of bluntness, he didn't seem to feel inclined to patting people on the back and lying to them either. The amber boy slumped down like me, twiddling his thumbs while sparks of rage laid hidden behind those brown eyes.
A light stamp of Lord Vannagrash's foot drew the attention of all those present. The calm unbothered nature that had radiated his being was replaced with a stone-cold one, causing me to shift back further up the column instinctively.
"Though it means little, the truth of the matter is that your sires either lacked the time or care to welcome you into this world, and thus they for a price, have pushed that job onto me and this facility you now stand. A crypt, a place where the living enter and the dead leave."
With a flick of his finger, the door behind opened and Lord Vannagrash started to walk out of the room, beckoning us into the illuminated hallway with Lady Rez. Begrudgingly I followed along with the other finally leaving that damned room that I'd been in for what felt like hours.
The hallway we stepped into looked to stretch on forever and maintained a consistent width of about 5 metres, allowing for passersby to walk forward and backward if necessary. On the walls, every thirty feet or so a floating ember of Azure fire lit up what would've otherwise been another completely dark area, thanks to the lack of windows and… sunlight. Similar deep slated black tiles and bricks kept the structure together with the tops corners of the hallway arched.
"You see, not too long ago our kin faced… a dilemma of sorts. Too many young and daring vampires went about siring the living into service, then either got bored or forgot about them. The result of a Fangless that isn't taken care of can be particularly ugly and a detriment to our race as a whole, so I and a few other like-minded individuals delved to turn our homes into a preparation facility of sorts. That way those who value their time more than their blood can drop off the recently turned to us and in turn for a price we can "educate" them. Marvellous isn't it." Lord Vannagrash spoke of the idea so highly, clearly enthralled by what he might've considered his own genius.
We passed many doors constructed in a more sleek wooden style as he continued to elaborate on the inner workings of the crypt and how exactly we would go about our day. I didn't listen. Not to a single word. It wasn't that I couldn't hear, I just didn't want to. My body moved on its own, uncaring for the internal plight. I was trying to think, really putting as much thought power as I could yet my mind failed to focus on any one detail drifting between counting the black bricks or strands of hair on the blonde's head.
In conclusion, there was a lot of both.
The distractions helped but didn't resolve my mental turmoil and I felt myself break further apart with each step I took. An infestation of hunger granted me a nauseating sensation that I imagined was akin to what my father must have felt when he drank too much alcohol.
I wonder what he would think of me now…
A thought that depressed me further.We continued walking and Lord Vanngrash continued to talk, occasionally answering queries from the other three. Every once in a while we would pass by someone and they would either smell of rot or smell of food. Strangely no one other than Lord Vannagrash wore any white, all sticking to brown, red or black. It was a curious oddity I only noticed because my mind refused to stop wandering.
Eventually, the hallway ended up bringing us to a large open space with eight staircases coming from each corner of the rectangular room, four leading down and four leading up. The roof held the first bit of what I considered natural light, constructed of tinted glass that gave a view of the stars above. A magnificent chandelier descended down from a black metal chain attached to the middle of that very same roof, contrasting well with the blackish-red suits of plate mail lined against the walls.
The place wasn't nearly as dreary as the hallway or sanctuary despite being constructed of the same black stone and carrying the same Azure flames that hovered like touches against the walls. It might have helped that they were also many people passing through. The divide between rot and food was about a thirty seventy split. I could see my alleged comrades staring at the more healthy-looking ones with an animalist intent, one of prey and predator, but my mind was too fuzzy to do the same.
"Lord Vannagrash." They would say, the ones of rot observing while the food walked by as quick as possible.
"This is one of two lobby areas within the crypt. The one below is for those who have become accustomed to the night while this place serves to help those going through "Transition" adjust. The northwest upper staircase leads to where you will be staying." Lord Vanna noted, having no need to weave through the room bustling occupants as they parted like the Lisa sea.
"W-what about the others, you said we had assessments and guidance to take." The brunette stuttered out, seemingly still getting used to the new "life" she had signed up for.
"Mmm, one of the Savrin will guide you at tomorrow's dusk, but for now that's all you need to know. Without proper rest, anything you learned would've faded by the next day."
He continued at a brisk pace, uncaring for the clear confusion painted across the three fangless's expressions, trailing up the northwest staircase that had a bright red carpet neatly layered over it. We were led up the stairs and further down another hallway with wooden doors and Azure wisps, the same as the last. This place certainly kept a theme, but that didn't make its interior design any less bleak.
"Stray."Lord Vannagrash announced, stopping at a door abruptly and peering in my direction, "This is where you will be staying during your tenure. The others will be closer to the lobby."
He tossed a single bronze key that my body caught instinctively even though I had no desire to do so. The other seemed to take that announcement as a provocation, again knowing something I didn't. Fantastic, simply marvellous.
"Lord Vannagrash, did you not just say that we were a coven, bound by rebirth." The blonde uttered, clearly uneasy about the attempt at separation.
Curious, I had taken her as the most morally ambiguous of our group. To get on the defensive for me without any clear motive and for something as little as this felt wrong. There had to be a reason, maybe this "bound" aspect she spoke of. Whatever it may have been, the feelings were most definitely not mutual. A felt no bond with any of these people.
"Yes, but he is a stray. A danger to you and himself because we know not who sired him or when."
That answer didn't look to be suitable for any of them, starting a quarrel I had no interest in. Finally, a piece of solace and solitude had become available to me, I was taking it regardless of what the others thought.
I opened the door while they all bickered towards the man who could end us all, wanting nothing but to get away from all of them; From all of this. With a seamlessly sliding motion, the key slotted in silently, requiring only a slight twist on my part before a click resounded from the lock.
"T-T-Thank you." I stuttered to Lord Vannagrash, shoving open the wooden door, walking in and then shutting it in one motion. That same small, annoying and disturbing part of me screamed that my actions were far too rude, that I needed to turn around and grovel on my knees, begging for a light punishment.
But I didn't care.
All I wanted then was a moment of silence to sort through the screaming in my head.