Nikolas and I walked side by side along the street. Just like the first time, bodies littered the streets in a flurry of tailored suits and pretty dresses. The day was a little bit humid, and I could feel the sweat trailing down my spine. My scalp was burning from the heat of the sun, and I was greatly thankful that my hair was short. But it didn't matter, so long as I could deliver these gifts to Ivan and Mel I would withstand anything. Even the memory of their venomous words—Ivan's in particular—didn't stop me. I had been successful with Niko and I would see through it.
We rounded a bend and bumped into an avenue that had less lavish buildings. I was holding the paper bags, and they brushed against my skirt with a muffled whish at each step. Niko had offered to carry them for me but I declined, saying it would be nice to hand them out to the boys myself.
"Hey, Niko." I said as we arrived at another intersection. The place was like a web of roads that seemed to go nowhere and somewhere both. But Niko seemed to have them all memorized. "How did you get to meet Ivan and Mel, anyway?"
"Ah, that." Niko had turned to me earlier, and when he looked front again his eyes were distant for a bit. As though he was recalling moments of the past. "I used to live in this neighborhood. We were playmates. When my father got promoted as captain, Master Varemont advised him to live in the estate. Because of his new position, Father had to oblige. But we never regretted the decision, the family has been nothing but kind to us."
"I see." I said, nodding. "What was it like, living here?"
He grimaced, and as much as he tried to hide it I still noticed it. "It was hard."
I saw now, the place where our feet had led us—Niko's feet rather. The entire street was a cluster of drab apartments, the walls stained with soot and grime. It felt as if I had entered a different dimension. Contrary to the vibrant and languid atmosphere of the uptown area of the city, this was something made out of monochrome and dust. Kids loitered around, with clothes that clung loose on their skinny frames or it was either these clothes had holes and gashes. The adults were a different matter. Their eyes were lifeless, cheeks hollow, and bones jutting from wrists and elbows and ankles. Everyone was too thin.
It occurred to me that we were in the slums, where underprivileged citizens of Carnelia dwelled. I had to guess most of them were non-wielders. As a city that relied heavily on its magic, it was usually the stronger wielders that had most of the opportunities, leaving the common jobs—or if there were really jobs at all—to the people without the power, without magic.
Their gazes slowly turned to me in a way that was devoid of energy or interest. But their eyes, it was as if they were taking me in, drinking up the whole image of me—hungry, curious . . . scanning, scanning, scanning. Gooseflesh skittered up my arms as I felt their seemingly inanimate scrutiny. They stared and stared.
How could they not? Every part of me screamed noble, a kitten that had lost its way into a den of rats.
Wait, 'rats'. Holy shit.
I had told Ivan that it was him who stank of rat piss. Oh Fates, help me. I understood now, why rage swirled and darkened his bright honey eyes. He lived here, in this poor neighborhood. And I told him that, of all the things to say to him. The shame in me couldn't have gone worse, but it had.
I just wished the ground would swallow me whole. Can it? I'd really prefer to pass out right this moment. Better yet, disappear completely from the face of the realm. I did not deserve to live, a person as horrible as me. Dear goddesses, should you have any punishment fitting enough—though I doubt there is—I'd gladly accept it.
Niko's voice pulled me to reality. "Lily, we have to go."
He was becoming wary of the weird looks we were earning. We really had to go.
I swallowed, and it was an effort to even lift my foot. "Okay."
We proceeded to an alleyway, the walls of the houses churning and churning. I felt dizzy.
I slapped my cheeks, forcing myself to focus on the present. What's said has been said. I couldn't undo what had been done. What mattered now was to say that I didn't mean it that way.
We found Ivan and Mel sitting atop a crate, their backs to each other. They shifted in unison to face us fully.
"You," said Ivan. Both boys regarded me as though I was a lost hatchling.
"Uh, hi." I raised a hand. "It's me."
They didn't speak. And for several seconds I thought I had already failed miserably. But I jumped when it sunk to me that they were waiting.
"Oh, here." I thrust the paper bags to the space between us. "This is for you guys."
Mel lifted a brow, but he took the gifts. Ivan's gaze remained on me.
This was it—my chance.
I heaved in a breath. "Listen, those words I said to you. I didn't mean it. They came right out of my mouth without me thinking about it. At times, I can be incredibly stupid. I didn't know it would offend you that much given . . . given I was not made aware of your circumstances. Believe me, I did not mean it the way you thought I meant it. Also, one more thing, I'm from a family of hot-blooded people. We blow up real quick. But this doesn't mean I'm justifying my actions. I am to blame for hurting you. I am a person of short patience, I admit. It was on me. Please allow me to make it up to you."
The words exited my lips like a flood, fast and unyielding and continuous. Without pauses. By the end, I was huffing and puffing. I might have over exerted myself there.
Surprise was written on Puppy Boy's leaf-green eyes. Ivan was incredulous, his brows raised high.
Then they laughed. Niko was the one who laughed the loudest.
"W-what," I murmured. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No, silly." Niko said, ruffling my hair. "It was good. You make good apology speeches."
My cheeks burned.
Ivan cleared his throat. "You didn't have to explain though. Niko told us everything about you after you left. He told us you weren't like the other nobles. We were in the wrong. We should have let him speak first. It was our mistake. And . . . we kind of jumped into the conclusion that fast because you were a girl. We thought you were a brat. Sorry."
"Yup," Mel got up and patted my shoulder. "Sorry, Lily."
I was lightheaded. Was this truly happening? I was overthinking this the whole goddesses-damned time?
"And thank you for this." Niko peered into the paper bags. "Whatever this is?"
"Oh, those are strawberry tarts and cheesecakes." I couldn't suppress my smile. "My mother baked them for you. I did some assisting."
"Cool," Ivan said. "Come on, let's eat them together."
This was the period of my teenage years when I formed friendships, unbreakable ones—or so we had assumed. In a world filled with troubles, we were young people who thought we were bigger than anything that laid ahead.