Here I am, in the middle of nowhere being a slime-ish thing… No one around, only distant howls of some unknown monsters. I am really fucked, am I?

Okay, let's get into my memory…

My name was (or still IS, I guess…) Edward Cowell. Your average guy in his middle 20s living a good life, having your average job. Where did everything go wrong?

Hm… Maybe that part where I got shot?

Yeah. I think I was crossing a street when I heard some loud gunshot. The next thing I remember is me, lying on the ground, thinking when will I die. That's pretty… Normal death, I think? Still not being dead from old age, but normal, too.

And there I am, in a body of some slime, I guess? Oh, I'm sorry, a PURPLE-colored slime.

This… Feels weird, to be honest. Having a body of a really feels like a fever dream. Especially when you're in some apocalyptic ass place like where I am.

Ok, now let's move a little.

And when I tried to move… Nothing happened… This is strange… When I tried to do this again — No progress whatsoever.

Hm, how do slimes really move? I think they are like bouncing or something. Ok, let's try this thing…

I pressured my body like I was a spring, and then I jumped. Surprisingly it worked. Jumped as high as one meter.

Now let's try to do it on the sides.

Again, I pressured my body, but this time I jumped to the sides rather than simply up. I finally moved from my… Birthplace? Spawn? I don't know how to name it.

Excited, I started to move around bouncing. Man, this honestly feels weird.

Bouncing for a couple of minutes, I found a skull, I think? A bull skull to be exact. When I tried to touch it, it simply disappeared in my body. I felt a strange sensation in my body that I can make something. Like a natural feeling — being able to walk, breathe, see, etc.

And, obeying the feeling I created… Bones in my body? Well, my slime body now has bones… What the hell is this shit?

Now I have arms. Or a slimy tentacle with bones, to be correct.

I felt more exhausted when I did this. I think I need to sl...eep... no-o....w...

(Insert sleeping sounds here)