"I'm a coward," Jacob said to break the silence.
"You are not. And if you want to leave everything behind, these people seem now able enough to man the fort," she shrugged, not caring about humanity not nearly as much as she cared for him, "if you go, I'm coming with you. That's all there is to it. I don't care if you want to save humanity or build a hut and fish. I just want to be with someone who understands who I am."
"Even someone that can do that just because they forced an Ancestral Bond on you?"
Juliet looked at him, genuinely hurt.
"Jacob, I don't care about the goddamn Ancestral Bond. I've already told you that, you fucking idiot. We have it. Let's just live with it since we can't do otherwise and, while at it, I'll exploit everything that it has given me."
"Juliet, I just—I don't know if I can do all of this," Jacob sat up on the bench and took a longer puff from the cigarette, looking at the spirals of smoke raise from the small blazing stick. "I try to act tough, I told a man who almost liberated the world from Demonic Beasts that I know what to do and that everything he did was wrong. Who am I to say something like that? What authority do I hold over this person to just act like the new Champion of humanity?"
Juliet kept her mouth shut, just listening to Jacob venting.
"I feel like I'm drowning. It's like being two thousand meters underwater and trying to inhale air. So many things could be wrong, so many things. And sometimes I like to think that I could just walk away from all of this, that I could disappear into the night and leave this to someone else."
"You can, Jacob," Juliet sighed, "you could tell the others what you are telling me and just step back. Why not? You have given one life to help everyone, and you could take this one to help yourself."
Jacob slowly shook his head.
"It just doesn't work like that, I'm afraid. I like to think I could run away, maybe search for power again. In this life, I'm just a loser. I don't have the Plate anymore and it's impossible for me to go look for it at the moment. So, I don't know what to do. I wish it was easier, I wish I could just be stronger, much stronger. I wish I was as strong as Epagogia—no, as strong as Hektor. I live in constant fear I'll never be that strong again; and it feels like my past life is just but a blurred memory that never happened in this regard. Even if I was really strong back then, right now I'm just a talentless weakling. I can't lead like this. I'm a cultivator, I'm supposed to challenge the heavens, to reach for the stars… And look at me. I'm still at the Cockroach Realm. If I didn't have my experience, all the people around me, including you, would be much stronger than me."
Juliet looked at Jacob, at the unusual posture he had. He was hunched over the table, with shoulder drooping and lifeless eyes.
Everything had come somewhat easy to Juliet and the others.
Helena had woken up with an insane talent, his past-life girlfriend had a massive talent too and the Vermillion Tyrant had appeared out of nowhere with what could possibly be the highest human Cultivation in the whole world.
Jacob, instead, had had to claw his way to the top in his past life and he now had to do that again.
"I feel like I'm competing in another league, the loser league," Jacob murmured. "I don't even see myself among the greatest. Hektor called me the 'Blady Tyrant', but I just feel like the biggest joke. Every other Tyrant could kill me in a second and I don't know how long it will take for me to reach that level once again – if it's even possible at all."
"I—"
"No, Juliet, I just need to talk about these fears. Please, don't make it harder on me. Don't say anything. I just wanted to tell someone who could understand. I'm still going through with it. The Sword is the one thing I'm good at and I'm not giving up on my path, I'm just having an ol' good crying session if that's good with you."
Jacob dried up his eyes with his sleeve.
"It's more than okay, Jacob," Juliet put her hand over his, "you saved my life, Jake. If you need me to, I'll come with you to Hell and back, no questions asked. Whenever you feel helpless, just know that I will be there, ready to get the ball before you drop it. If I have to become the strongest person in the world for you, I will, trust me."
"Even the great hero of humanity is a fragile little bitch, huh?" Jacob joked while trying to find something to blow his nose.
Juliet just smiled.
She didn't need to do anything else to convey her emotions. In fact, Jacob had felt everything she had thought clearly. She had meant every single word.
"Juliet, I—I can't just tell you how grateful I am. I am not even sure the Ancestral Bond can convey all the gratitude I feel. I'm sorry you had to see this pitiful circus of pathetic emotions. I just had a little breakdown, you know? No biggie."
"No biggie," she smiled warmly toward him.
And they kept talking and joking until dawn. Jacob had opened a dam that could not be closed anymore and started talking about his past life, about how Helena's death had scarred him, how he had always felt like a fraud, how he felt he would never make it and how he was almost relieved to die.
…
Outside the pub, the Vermillion Tyrant listened to every bit of the conversation thanks to his enhanced earing.
A weird smile took over his face.