Chereads / A Compendium of My Thoughts / Chapter 10 - On the Idea of Fitting In

Chapter 10 - On the Idea of Fitting In

I've lived in many areas, urban, rural, big cities, small cities. I've lived many ways, poor enough to be eating from cheap cans and packaged meals in a small two room apartment, and rich enough to be complaining about the quality of food served in a Michelin star restaurant. No matter where I go though, one thing stays the same: People generally desire to be accepted by those around them. To fit in.

But what does it mean to fit in? To not offend people? To be agreed with by everyone? To not be hated by anyone? To conform to what is socially acceptable? That all sounds good and well, but is that really fitting in?

Fitting in is about building image. When we speak, we attempt to fill our character in the eyes of others to generally bring about the impression of ourselves that we desire. However, say, if one never says anything offensive, then once they build that image, it is difficult to express their opinions on certain topics. It would seem bizarre for that person to do so, and out of character. Your desired image restricts what you can do and say. And if you can't express yourself freely and truly, that's not really fitting in is it?

From what I've seen, those that fit in the most are actually the ones who frequently say the most radical things. They act as themselves from the very start, and since that's the way they are, people just accept the things they say, maybe even appreciate their words, no matter how outlandish what is being said may be. They are the ones who become liked by all, who become icons within the community. Think about the most well liked people around you; I'd bet you can probably think of people like this. Although they may pick up a few enemies along the way, such is life. For people who are afraid to offend, they say little of value and are remembered even less. It cannot be said that they fit in; being a nonentity is not fitting in. To fit in, you need to do you, say you, and be you.