It was early winter, and the room was extremely cold. I was lying in the snow-white warm bedding, exhausted, and didn't want to get up at all. But I knew I had to get up. The bell just rang, and it's 5 a.m. I have to get dressed in 20 minutes and gather downstairs for preparing breakfast.
I am a low-level footman in Momon Manor.
I quickly put on my shirt and vest, washed my face with cold water, and put on a silver-white wig.
On the hanger was a jacket with a black background and white stripes. I ironed it neatly before going to bed last night. Put it on carefully, put on white gloves, and high-heeled sheepskin shoes. I looked vigorous in the mirror.
When I left the room, I met Simon, who lives next door, and we hurried to the servant's dining room before we even had time to say hello.
In the hall downstairs, people were coming and going. A low-level housemaid covered with ashes in a white apron was trying to light the fireplace. The air was filled with a choking smell, which was the smoke released from the half-dry wood when it was burning. It was hard to see a housemaid as a novice and has no experience in lighting a high-end fireplace.
The housekeeper Selena hurried over and exclaimed in disbelief: "God! Why are you so stupid? I'm going mad with you. How did you make all these smokes! Do you want to choke the Masters upstairs in Manor, so they can't even have their breakfast in the morning? Open the windows for ventilation, and you girls, come over and light the fireplace for her." She directed several maids around.
Selena was the housekeeper of the Mormon Manor. She was over 40 years old. She has brown hair neatly combed into a bun, and she always wears a plain black smalekirt. There was no pattern on the skirt. She was serious, unsmiling, and sometimes very stern. Under her gaze, servants in the Manor were afraid to say anything, just like the lower-level housemaid who just did something wrong. She was scared in front of Selena and trembling.
When I stepped into the servant's hall, it was already full of people. On both sides of the long dining table were three or four footmen dressed the same as me, and more than a dozen housemaids in light pink cotton tutu skirts. I sat down in my seat and waited quietly for the arrival of the butler of Momon Manor.
I'm just an entry-level footman. The seat is at the end. Simon is also an entry-level footman. He was sitting next to me. At this moment, he was quietly whispering to me that the new maid opposite is very beautiful. The buzzing on the dining table disappeared instantly when the butler Aaron walked in, and everyone stood up, waiting for butler Aaron to sit on the main seat of the long table.
Butler Aaron has served at Momon Manor for nearly forty years. From a young boy to gray-haired, it is said that his family has been the butler of Momon Manor since his grandfather's generation. Now his son is studying in middle school. After graduation, he will also become the butler of Momon Manor. Time flies and time has only left a trace on his face, but his life track has been like the same routine for decades. After he took his seat, he waved to the people on both sides, and everyone sat down and began to eat. No one speaks, no one makes extra moves, just eat quickly.
Suddenly a bell rang, and there were two rows of bells hanging on the snow-white wall, with thin wires connected to the bells, and one of the bells was shaking.
The housekeeper Selena got up and said, "Madam is awake. Now bring the coffee."
Madam's two maids immediately put down the tableware and hurried to the kitchen.
The servants at the table left one by one. Simon and I went to the main dining room, folded the white printed tablecloth on the long table neatly and put it in the basket, then took out the new tablecloth that was dried yesterday and carefully covered it on the tabletop.
There were some wrinkles on the white tablecloth. I took a kettle with boiling water and quickly ironed it until the tablecloth was smooth and neat.
"It's too slow, you should have finished it already!" Two senior footmen walked in carrying a small table with silver cutlery.
"It's ready." I took the kettle away and said with respect.
The senior footmen arranged silver tableware in an arrogant manner one after another.
"What are you guys still doing here! Go to do your work and stop nosing around!" A senior footman glanced at me and Simon and said coldly.
Simon stood aside and wanted to learn how they put the tableware. After all, we are entry-level footmen and are not qualified to serve meals. Unfortunately, the senior footmen didn't want us to learn anything we shouldn't know. They dismissed us with no further concern.
Simon and I had to go to the kitchen, which was very busy. The chef was a tall man with a big belly, and he gave orders like a king, letting the kitchen maids juggle with the food and containers. The food just out of the pot has been put on the silver dinner plate, hot and enticing, and then covered with a shiny silver lid. I took the tray and walked out of the kitchen. I stood upright at the door of the main dining room. After the masters were seated, I passed the food in.
Simon also stood beside me with a silver tray, moaning about what the two senior footmen have done before.
"What's so great about them, too arrogant."
"Hushh, keep your voice down, you will be heard," I said.
"One day I will become the valet of the Viscount Lord," Simon said.
"Being a valet requires the ability to read," I whispered.
"I'm learning how to spell, and I asked Uncle John to buy a book for me a while ago." Simon glanced out of the gray window and said, "The weather looks bad outside. Are you going home today?"
"I asked butler Aaron three months ago. I only have half a day off. I have to go back no matter whether it rains or not."
"What are you going to do? Give all your wages to your alcoholic mother?"
I said: "She has to feed three children. She needs money."
"I hope she didn't immediately trade all your money into wine." Simon said sarcastically, "You might as well buy a new pair of shoes instead."
I looked down at my sheepskin high-heeled shoes. They were a bit old. Although I cleaned and polished them carefully to make them look very shining, if you look carefully, you would find open seams in the corners. This was a very shameful thing. If it was discovered by the butler Aaron, he might kick me out because I disgraced Mormon Manor.
"I will just ask a craftsman to fix it." I looked at the vamp and said, in fact, my socks are also torn and I need new pairs too.
The old shoes and socks, the shirt with patches inside, I look a lot worse than in my previous life.
I remember that at this time in my previous life, I had just become a footman of Momon Manor, holding the wages I earned. Ambitious, high-spirited, and competitive, I spend all my wages on buying decent clothes, books to learn spelling and arithmetic, and bribing senior footmen to teach me courtesy...
The hurried day finally passed, and I walked down the country road with a basket of bread baked by the cook.
In the early winter, Yorkshire was desolate and the grass was high. One or two shepherds drove a few sheep across the trail, the black-fur sheep bite the turf leisurely, and a mongrel drove them around.
I took a deep breath and exhaled a lot of white mist. The tip of my nose was probably red and cold, and I couldn't breathe. This feeling makes me uncomfortable and reminds me of a very similar pain in my memory...
...
The man with severe typhoid fever was lying on the shabby bed, breathing hard. The priest stood beside the bed and asked, "Are you Mr. Owen?" The man was panting, his face was pale, and he looked at the priest with fear, and said with difficulty: "Oh Father... why are you here? You... are you here to give me... the communion..."
The priest said: "No, I not here to start the Eucharist, you will get better. I'm just, but... If you can use the opportunity of my visit, for example, to make a confession or something, then I would be more than happy. I am a pastor and I always seize every opportunity to get my lost lamb back."
After a long silence, the man panted and nodded slightly.
The priest said: "The mercy of God is boundless, my child, please follow me and say: 'I confess to the Almighty... confession to the eternal Saint Mary...'" The priest paused from time to time to allow the dying to keep up. Finally, he said: "Well, now you can confess..."
The man can only murmur something as if he had exhausted all his strength.
"I cheated on him, betrayed him..."
The priest repeated: "You are guilty of deceiving others..."
The man's gasps became more severe, his body starts to spasm, tears fell out, and he kept repeating: "I cheated on him, betrayed him..." After a twitch, the man's breathing gradually ceased. The priest put the cross on the man and asked his neighbor: "Does he have any relatives?" The neighbor said: "I don't know, he has been living alone..."
...
A cold wind blew, and I shuddered a little, shaking away the memories in my mind. The cold death was still like just happened yesterday.
I am very lost, I don't know if I am still in a dream. I am a lost lamb, I have committed a sin. I don't know if the Lord would forgive me. If you forgive me, why is everything of yesterday repeating itself? If there is no forgiveness, why let me resurrect with memory...