I blinked back to Jericho. The thrill of the amusement park was diametrically contrary to how I was feeling just now. At the game booth, there was a grim reaper playing darts. I was hoping to see August at the shooting range, but he wasn't there.
Lilibeth, What a mouth!
I was upset that he was mad at me, yet I had done the same thing to him.
I looked at every possible attraction August could visit, but I couldn't find him. I went to the library. There was no sign of him other than three grim reapers sitting in groups reading books together. He always found me when we had work to do, but I had no idea where to look for him. Mandy, who was often sitting by the lake, was my last hope. Dex was there with her.
I was hesitant to intervene because of the lovey-dovey atmosphere. I was afraid if I didn't make amends with him, we wouldn't get along forever. Who knew how much longer I would be a grim reaper?
"Did you see August?"
They both turned to face me and shook their heads.
"I haven't yet seen him."
"Do you know where he likes to go?"
Mandy drew her brows together and lifted her fingers to the point of her chin.
"I often see him at the shooting range, the garden, or in the duck paddle boat."
"I have looked everywhere."
"Then it would be a wasteland."
I hadn't checked outside of Jericho yet, but he could be there.
"Thanks, Mandy." I turned to Dex and smiled. I asked Mandy another question before going in search of August. "Do you know what books he enjoys reading?"
"A book?" She frowned. "I'm not sure about the title, but the author seemed to be N-I-V-E-K. I remembered because it was Kevin's spelling backward. Why do you ask?"
"Nothing. Thanks"
I actually walked away this time. If only I knew what book August had seen in the store. It should explain his odd mood, but first I needed to apologies to him.
I only came to the wasteland when I met Jed, one of the Order. Except for the light, this place was as dry as a desert and as vast as the void. August was nowhere to be seen in this place. It appeared that no one was present no matter where I looked.
Despite the fact that there was no sun, it was as bright as when the sun was above my head. It was also really hot, like if I were in a firepit. A grim reaper was a dead person. We weren't supposed to have feelings, but we felt everything as if we were alive. I thought remembering those feelings was a curse, but August...he...
A man sat beneath a huge tree with many branches but no leaves. It was really dry. However, the presence of trees in this wasteland astounded me. I approached the man who was still hugging his knees and stared at the empty space.
"May I join you?"
August didn't respond; normally, I would have gone away, but not this time. I took a seat next to him.
We sat there silently staring at nothing; whatever direction we turned, all we saw was dry, cracked, lifeless ground. There wasn't even a breeze blowing.
"If there is nothing, you should go back."
August's voice caught me off guard.
"I..." I was hesitant to apologies. My hands brushed against the hem of my own garments.
When I went to apologies to Jamie after our fight, he had an affable atmosphere, as if he was prepared to forgive or at the very least listen. August was nothing like that. Even though he was only sitting there, he made me feel uncomfortable and scared.
We could have sat like this all day if I hadn't said anything.
Be brave, Lilibeth!
"I shouldn't have said that." My voice was softer than expected. "I don't understand why you have to be so cold. Why don't you think they simply want to live? They are still attached to the idea of living."
"Are you coming to apologies or to fight?"
"I'd like to apologies." I responded quickly, glancing at him. August was staring straight ahead. "I'm sorry. But what you did was also wrong."
Oh, I'm picking a fight.
He rubbed his hair with both hands. Jamie has made a similar gesture before when he was having trouble with his classmates. He just sat silently and didn't say anything. How did I get him to speak to me back then? It was hundreds of times easier to approach Jamie than it was to approach August.
"Well, at least I'm generous enough to forgive you. Just stop repeating the same mistakes over and over again. It's annoying."
"Meaning?"
August gazed at me, and whatever he saw made him roll his eyes.
"What was Death thinking when he appointed you to be a grim reaper?" He stood up as soon as he finished his speech. The large tree vanished before my eyes.
"How can you do that?"
August grinned.
"You've got a lot to learn."
"How else would I know if you didn't teach me?"
He shrugged and returned to Jericho. To keep up, I quickened my pace.
"What exactly do you mean? How come I can't be the Grim Reaper?"
August turned a deaf ear. I wanted to yank his collar to get him to stop walking, but the mood between us was better. I didn't want to ruin it again, so I didn't ask about the book, that writer, or anything else that helped me understand his human side.
When we arrived back in Jericho, August turned to face me, slightly annoyed.
"How long will you continue to follow me?"
"Well… you always knew where I was, but it took me a long time to find you. Since no one knows how long you have to supervise me, I'd like to get to know you better."
August gave a cheeky smirk when he heard that.
"Are you falling for me?"
My lips were pursed. August was the polar opposite of Gary. Why did I keep thinking of Gary even though he had a girlfriend?
"By the way, how about that colleague? Are you fond of him?" August asked, as if he hadn't already known. I made an annoyed expression.
"It's none of your business."
"True." He shrugged and walked away.
When I was alone, I thought about Gary. His consideration of that woman reminded me of the night we walked home together. If I could go back in time, I would make a different decision.
The dead are the dead. Doesn't matter how you died. You cannot change anything!
August wasn't completely wrong. Was there anything he wished to change, though?