Afterlife.
I'd seen so many televisions programmes talking about the afterlife from some people who claimed they'd experience death; what would be the last thing a living could see before they died? What awaited them? Someone said there was a white light, the brightest one. It was the most beautiful thing they'd ever seen.
You wanna know the truth?
Spoiler alert!
It is so dark and terrifying.
You might not want to believe what I saw after my eyes opened once again. My own body lying on the floor, mutilated by this monster. I thought I was dreaming. I thought the alcohol level was too high and caused me to imagine things.
How could I stand here when my body was there?
Why would I dream about someone who killed me, tortured me? Then something hit me, and I remembered them all.
I was on my way home when this man attacked me, dishonoured me, and strangled me to dead.
My hand reached to my neck when I remembered what happened. I stared behind at this man slitting my body. He enjoyed it. He was satisfied.
"Stop it!" I said. "Stop!"
"He can't hear you, you know."
I turned to where the sound came from and found a man dressed in black walking toward me. He looked at my body on the floor, his face showed no emotion like he was used to it.
"Lilibeth Mary Langdon, you've got to go. I'll escort you."
"How did you know my name? Why do I have to go with you?
"Do you realise what happened to you?" He looked annoyed like he'd been through this stuff before over and over again.
"This man killed me! Why don't you do something? Call the police! Get some help!"
"Calm down. Yelling is not going to help anyone. We can't do anything about him either. You're dead."
"I'm…what?"
I turned to the killer who just took the necklace from my neck and placed it in his jeans' pocket. My hand reached to the locket around my neck. It wasn't there.
"I'm…I'm a ghost?"
"No. Not yet anyway. If you refuse to come with me, then you will be."
"I don't understand."
While we were talking that monster covered my body with a sheet he retrieved from his car that was parked outside this alley. He was prepared. Did he know me? Was he following me? So many questions popped into my head.
"You're dead. I'm a grim reaper who's here to collect your soul and guide you to where you belong." The man in black said.
"Where would that be? And why don't you do something about that man? He's a killer, don't you see it?"
"It's not his time. It's yours," again, he showed no emotion.
The killer looked around as if he wanted to make sure no one saw him. His eyes met mine and something inside me was burning. He showed no remorse. His blue eyes looked calm. His face was peaceful like nothing had happened, like I didn't matter. He dragged my body to his car like he dragged a rubbish bag ready to be thrown away.
He'd done it before. If he got away, he was going to do it again.
"I can't go." I told the man in black. "I refuse to follow you. That man needs to be punished and I'll make that happen."
"You have no choice. You're dead. You don't belong here any longer."
"Then why can you be here?"
"Because I'm a grim reaper. It's my job to be here."
"Then I'll be a grim reaper, if that could make me stay."
"You can't be a grim reaper," he looked taken aback. "It's not your decision."
"Whose, then?"
"Death."
Somehow that word astonished me, made me numb. I couldn't find the right word to say.
"I'm sorry," he said. "It's your time."
I didn't want to go. What about my parents? My brother? My colleagues? I was just getting to know them. My life was just about to start. Why did he do this to me? How could he destroy my life and moved on? No way. No. He had to suffer. He had to be miserable. I would hunt him down no matter what it would take.
"I'll be your grim reaper. You hear me?" I looked up at the night sky, yelling. I wasn't sure why I did that. "Make me your grim reaper! Help me take my revenge!"
"That's not going to help. He doesn't talk to you or anyone," said, the grim reaper. "You don't want to end up like this."
Sadness was the first emotion I saw on his face, but I wasn't going to give up. I made my decision.
"I'll work for you as long as you let me take his soul!"
The night sky made me feel lost and hopeless like I was staring into a giant black pit.
"Will you obey?"
"Did you hear that?"
I looked around, but no one was there except the grim reaper who looked at me as if I was crazy.
"Will you obey, my child?"
"That voice…it's like…it's inside my head."
I felt like I was losing my mind. The grim reaper was surprised by the fact that I heard the voice.
"He's talking to you."
"Answer me. Will you follow the rules when I granted your wish?"
"Yes!"
"Will you only collect the soul of the name you receive and not interfere with life and death?"
"I will."
"Think carefully Lilibeth Mary Langdon. When you accept my generosity, you'll be bound by the life and death contract. Punishments for breaking the rules could vary. The greatest one is to perish. Do you still want to become a grim reaper?"
Life. Death. Punishment. I barely understood those words though I was determined. Nothing was going to stop me. As long as I could stay here, I could find him. He was the one who had to be punished.
"I do." I said firmly without a second thought. "Will you promise me that I'll be the one to collect his soul?"
"Yes, Lilibeth Mary Langdon, I appoint you to the position of Soul Collector. August will supervise you."
I waited for some miraculous light to show that I'd become a grim reaper, but nothing had happened.
The man in black sighed.
"I hope you get what you want," he said, wryly. "Now come with me."
"Didn't you hear what he said? I'm a grim reaper now. I don't have to go with you."
I ran off to the street, tried to find where the car went. That monster was long gone though he needed to dump my body somewhere. He wouldn't carry my body all the way, would he?
"In case you missed the most important part," the reaper appeared in front of me, "August will supervise you."
His air quotes reminded me of my Accounting tutor back at university. I wondered how one of my favourite tutors was doing.
"What do you mean supervise? Aren't I allowed going anywhere I want?
He ignored my questions, opened his left palm. A tiny piece of paper appeared. He caught it between his forefinger and middle finger.
"We've got work to do. Let's go."
"Wait. I should try to find that man. I can do that, can't I?"
August tried not to show his anger to me, but his clenching fist and white knuckles said it all.
"Let me get this straight. You are now a grim reaper. When you receive the name, you go to them and collect their soul. You can't wander around as you please and you're under my supervision. You go where I go. Until the name of the man who killed you appear, you stick with me. Are we clear?"
Be patient. I told myself. His name would appear soon. When that happened, I would make his last breath memorable. The best way to learn something is practice, deliberately practice. August just appeared in front of me which meant I could do that as well. Invisible was one of the reapers abilities. I needed to understand them and knew how they work in order to fulfil my purpose.
"Yes, we're clear."
"Good. Now follow me, Lilibeth."
"It's Lilith." I told him. "Lilibeth was a sweet and innocent human being. I'm not that person anymore."
He looked at me for the first time.
"Of course, Lilith." August held out his hand. I looked at his hand then his face. Annoyed, he said. "You don't know how to blink so I'm helping you. Now give me your hand."
I had no choice but to do as I was told. Once my hand touched his, the gust of wind hit my face I had to close my eyes. I was already dead. Breathing wouldn't be necessary though my chest hurt so bad like I was drowning. My mouth gasped for air, my hand squeezed his hard.
All those experiences happened in just a blink of an eye. That was why he called it blink. When I opened my eyes, the famous amusement park greeted me. We'd just travelled eleven miles in less than five seconds.
"How far can we go?"
"As far as you know the destination. We've this ability so we can collect souls on time."
August started walking along the boardwalk, I had to speed up my pace to catch up with him.
"You mean we can go anywhere we want?"
"Yes." He stopped short, gave me a stern look of warning. "Don't do something stupid, Lilith. We're being tracked. They know where we're going."
"They? Who're they?"
"No more questions."
He didn't talk to me, nor slow down his pace. I kept my mouth shut and followed him to a residential complex.
I had never been to this part of the city before. It was in my to-do list. Then I remembered that Lin lived in Brooklyn. She said if I wanted to hang out, I could call her anytime. I couldn't believe that conversation happened less than 24 hours. First day at work, you'd met your colleagues and the next thing you know, you're dead.
I looked at the night sky above me, wondered what I did so wrong that I had to end up like this. The warm air soothed me, touched my face lightly. I wasn't sure that the grim reaper could feel, or it was just how I remembered the feeling.
The loud footsteps approached us, a young man wearing a gray hoodie ran away from something. He looked nervous and paranoid. He tried to cover his face as he ran towards August.
I almost shouted 'look out!' when the young man ran right through August's body. Suddenly, he ran through me as well left me no time to process. I stopped short, gasping. The feeling was unpleasant like I was stuffed in a can, it suffocated me for seconds.
"You'll get used to it." August said as he continued on his way to the small path between the two buildings.
Another young man was lying on the ground, covered in blood. His eyes watered, his mouth gasped for air, his hand covered his stomach; the source of bleeding.
August observed the young man. He had no intention of helping him.
"He was stabbed." I said because the silence was too much for me. "Was it that guy we saw earlier? No one was here except him. We should…"
"We're doing nothing. It's his time."
"What happened? Why am I here?"
The young man appeared behind us. I should call it his spirit since his body was still on the ground.
"Derek Paulo Lambert, you're dead."
I was stunned by August's straightforward. He got to the point, didn't give Derek time to process the situation.
My supervisor approached Derek, wrapped his arm around the man's shoulder. It looked like a friendly gesture, in fact August was trying to get the young man to follow him and complete his task.
"No. Wait. It doesn't make any sense." Derek protested, pushing August's hand away.
"You have to come with me." August grabbed the spirit's upper arm, dragged him away from his body.
"No. What about Jonathan? He did this to me! He killed me! That bastard killed me!"
Black smoke took shape in front of us like a giant circle where August led the spirit to.
"Aren't you coming?"
I looked at Derek's body for the last time. As he was dead, his eyes were still wide opened from terror.
Did he close my eyes?
The question had stuck in my head while I was following my supervisor into the black smoke.
I thought heaven or wherever grim reapers had to guide the spirit to would be astonished, filled with bright light and flowers, a place that made people want to live. Instead, it was dark and only had one hardwood door appeared in front of us.
August opened the door, the white light beamed into my eyes.
"You can go in." He told Derek who looked calmer than before. I wondered what August had told him.
"You're not coming with me?"
"We're not allowed."
Derek stepped inside the room. He looked at August, then me, then he walked in, and the door shut behind him.
"What's going to happen next?"
The corner of August's lips twitched slightly. Teasing he said.
"If you're curious, why don't you check it by yourself?"
"You just said we're not allowed." He was playing with me! "You're trying to trick me, aren't you? You want me to go in there because you cannot reap my soul since I'm a grim reaper like you. I'm your incomplete task."
"Tsk." August turned to another direction. He used – what I was going to call – the commanding voice to order me. "Now, follow me."
"Where to?"
"Home."
I didn't know that grim reapers had a home.
I didn't know a lot of things about them; their work, their rules. My recklessness led me to my own death, my thoughtfulness started a butterfly effect.