Emma's POV
The white envelope shivered in my hands. I hadn't been this nervous since I found out I was going to college, and even then, it was my mother's doing. She had waved the piece of paper in my face with a grin, yelling and jumping at the word 'accepted'. I wished she was there when I opened this envelope.
Knowing that these exams cost me twenty to forty percent of my final grade, I didn't want to look. Instead, I wanted to throw it away, maybe in a trash can and set it on fire.
"We can do it together," Aiden offered. He, too, had received his white envelope a few weeks after Christmas. Once the holidays were over, my every waking moment was alongside Aiden's. "You're brilliant, Emma. Whatever the results..." he trailed off.
I squirmed and shoved the envelope into his chest. "You do it."
A soft chuckle left him as he shook his head and accepted it. "Alright. Then you open mine." He pointed his envelope at me.
Hesitantly, I took it. "At the same time?"
"At the same time," he affirmed.
At the exact moment, I ripped his envelope open, his slim fingers hooked under the flap of mine. He slid out the paper inside and unfolded it; I did the same. His face was completely blank as he read the scripture inside. He looked at me, waiting.
I took a breath and began to read the paper with his name. It consisted of columns assigned to each class with a score underneath them. I skimmed over the initial numbers and went to the last row. I looked at him with a smile.
His brows raised. "Well...?"
"You passed!" I exclaimed. His twisted features untangled into a bright, dimpled smile.
"Really? I passed?" A large hand brushed back his wavy hair.
"Almost all your scores land above the eighty percent mark, Aiden. You passed." I mirrored his grin and wrapped my arms around his neck, accustomed to how natural it felt. However, it didn't last long when I realised he still had my scores. "How did I do?"
Aiden caged me into his embrace with a collision of warmth and kissed me. I yelped when he picked me up and levelled our faces. "All scores above ninety, sweetheart."
A cold gust of wind entered my mouth as it hung open. "Are you... Did I really...?"
"You did amazing." He kissed me again, his firm grin plastering against mine. "I am so proud of you."
Aiden placed me back on the concrete in front of the library and tucked a loose lock of hair behind my ear.
"We both did amazing," I corrected him.
"You need to go inside. You'll be late," Aiden said, gesturing at the large front doors with his head.
"I know." I frowned. "Do you need to be anywhere today?"
He cleared his throat, eyes flicking at the building behind me. "I have a few places to be."
I nodded and turned on my heel, then I quickly added, "I'm proud of you too, Aiden."
His smile wavered, and the light in his eyes dimmed, but he shook his head and waited for me to go inside before leaving. I thought it odd.
The rest of the day rolled by in a blur. I stocked new book arrivals into their allocated shelves and talked with Kate every chance I got. She had new highlights in her hair, hiding away the greying locks above her small ears.
"Could you do me a favour and give Arthur the list of pre-orders for me?" She asked, typing away at her computer.
"Sure. Where is he today?" I took the paper list on the counter.
She pursed her lips in thought. "Try the office. If he's not there, try the men's bathroom. Knock before you go in either one. Who knows what he does in private." She visibly shivered.
I gave a silent chuckle as I started toward the office. The door was ajar, but I followed Kate's advice and knocked. A stiff "come in" echoed out. Then, with a soft push, the door opened.
"Oh, hello, Emma," Arthur said from the corner of the room. He was standing, bobbing up and down like he was going to sit but changing his mind halfway through. His phone was between his pale hands, swiping down on the screen.
"Are you busy?" I took a tentative step into the room.
"I'm circulating blood flow." He answered, still bouncing.
I took that as an invitation and entered the room. He pulled out a chair a minute later, taking a seat in front of me, phone still in hand.
"Kate wanted me to pass along the list of pre-orders to you." I held out the piece of paper, but Arthur didn't look up from his phone. "Is everything okay?"
He peered up at me over the device. "What? Oh, yes. Is there something you need?"
Instead of repeating myself, I pointed at the phone. "Are you looking for more ideas to haunt Kate with?"
A frown weighed the corner of his lips down. "Listen, I've tried giving her vibrators, erotic romance novels, Sudoku, I've tried male and female strippers, and nothing gets her, you know, excited. She's dry as a desert down there, and she's not doing anything to help. A man my age can only do so much."
I looked away briefly and cleared my throat from the spurt of laughter bubbling in my throat. "Have you tried Viagra?" I joked.
He looked at me gravely and scoffed. "That one almost earned me a date with the judicial system. And I'm an immigrant, so that won't look good on my record." He tilted his head in thought. "Although... Women fancy a man with a criminal record these days... Hm. Well, I might just try that again. I've been a little dry myself lately."
I hid the grimace on my face with my hand. "So, what are you doing now?"
The frown arched into an innocent smile. He crossed one leg over the other and leaned back. "I'm taking a quiz to find out what Disney princess I am." He began scrolling on his phone once more. "Have you done it before?"
I nodded, remembering the time I did a similar quiz while in pyjamas a few months ago. "Belle, from Beauty and the Beast."
"What a shocker." Arthur snickered. Then, as if an afterthought came over him, a wicked grin spread over his mouth. "I can be the Beast to your Belle."
"Prison won't be kind to you." I mused, shaking my head and taking a seat at one of the desks, placing the list Kate had given me on the side. "So, who did you get in the quiz, Ursula?"
"I would know by now if the wee-fee worked faster." His tailored pants scrunched at the thighs when he repositioned his legs.
"Wi-fi, Arthur," I informed him.
He blinked at me. "What the hell is that? Some kind of sushi?"
I opened my mouth but shut it again, finding it useless to explain.
Arthur continued tapping on his screen, casually swiping down every few seconds. After a while of sitting in silence, an odd shriek filled the room. "It's like this thing doesn't know me at all!" He wobbled upright, exasperated.
"Who did you get?" I grinned, impatient to know.
"I don't wish to talk about it." He said calmly and left the room in small angry strides. "Bullshit I'm Snow White!" He yelled once the door shut.
My laughter lasted a while after Arthur left. Throughout the rest of my shift, I continuously ran into Kate, sharing a laugh over Arthur's quiz results. When my phone rang from my bag, I unzipped the compartment and took it out, reading Will's text message.
'I'll be there in five. I brought coffee.'
I stared at the text and then looked at the clock. My shift ended in ten minutes.
I quickly sent a reply. 'Is everything okay?'
'I was going to ask you the same thing.'
I waited for his follow-up text, glancing around the empty office.
'Aiden texted me to pick you up. He didn't tell you?'
Without thinking, I exited our conversation and opened the one I shared with Aiden, sending him a message. No reply. Why would he ask Will to pick me up and not say anything to me? He seemed fine earlier, albeit a little odd, but acting normal. We didn't fight; in fact, we hadn't fought in weeks. We discussed things, communicated, talked about our problems, and suddenly he left.
'I'm sure everything is fine.' I replied to Will. 'I'll see you soon.'
I didn't think everything was fine. Aiden never did this unless something happened to him. I tried calling his number several times, but I went straight to voicemail. I took a breath, reassessing. Perhaps his phone died, and he was unable to text me. Or maybe he was preoccupied with something else. I chose the option that kept me less worried.
Five minutes passed and Will was at the front desk talking to Kate. I gathered my bag as Kate opened the office door with a smile. "A man named William is asking for you. Do you know him?"
"He's a friend. I'll be there in a minute. Thank you, Kate." With a nod, she shut the door and spoke to Will again. He gave her his polite smile and looked around the space curiously.
By the time I came out with my bag hung over my shoulder, Will was getting off the phone. "Kaylie says hi."
"Tell her I say hi back." I smiled, following Will out to the parking lot. I slid into the passenger seat of his car, picking up one of the steamed cups of coffee. For a while, we didn't speak. We both sipped on our cups until they were empty. "Did you get your exam results yet?"
"I did. Haven't opened it yet, though. I'm too scared," he confessed.
"I'm sure you did great."
Will turned to me once he parked across my apartment building. "Can I ask?"
"I don't know why he didn't show," I replied, knowing what his question would be.
Will's mouth twisted to the side. "I'm sure he has a good reason. You're both in a good place now. I mean, at least he texted me this time. So that's an improvement, right?"
I wasn't going to assume anything before I spoke with Aiden. I had made that mistake before, and I didn't plan on doing it again. Despite his sudden absence, lack of communication, and odd behaviour at the library, I would wait until he came back. Whether it was two excruciating days later or a very long hour.
I looked at my friend. "Thanks, Will."
"Do you want me to come up with you?" he offered as he unbuckled his seatbelt.
"No, no. Go. Be with Kaylie. I'm sure she misses you." Will didn't look so sure, but eventually, he agreed and left once I was in the building.
I climbed the stairs, feeling the weight of the day finally mark its heavy presence on my shoulders. Like I had done a thousand times before, I unlocked my door to find a dark, empty apartment. I hadn't been this alone in weeks. Aiden had always been here with me. At that moment, it couldn't have felt any colder.
I shook off those thoughts, convincing myself everything was fine. I tried Aiden's phone again, but I received his automatic voicemail just like the past ten times I called. It hadn't even been his voice leaving the message but the one of a robotic man.
It was eleven at night when I finally decided to try my luck with sleep. I tossed and turned and buried my head in my pillows until I tired myself out and welcomed the dreams.
It was a dreadful sleep. So much so, in fact, that I awoke to my dark room feeling like no time had passed. The glow of my alarm clock was the only light casting a red glow beside my head. It was the sound of a door slamming and boots smacking wildly that I jolted out of my bed with a start. I listened for the footsteps as they became uneven and almost sloppy.
"Emma?" His voice was almost unrecognisable in my ears. It was slurred and blurry and messy. He called after me again and I eased under the covers. He came back. He's okay.
I slowly left my room, following the timbre of his voice. I walked down the hallway and found him standing in my kitchen, hair in knots and black clothes dishevelled. He looked as though he had been tossed into a washing machine. Carefully, I neared him.
His troubled eyes found mine. "Hello, sweetheart."
I didn't like the calm in his voice; It was forced.
"Are... are you okay? Where have you been?" I rounded the kitchen counter and stood in front of him, noticing the stench of alcohol fanning from him. "Are you drunk?"
"I missed you." A slanted smile cast over his lips. He reached out for me, cupping my face in his large, cold hands. "I missed you a lot."
"Are you okay? I called you-"
"I told William to drive you home." His features hardened. "Did he?"
"He did." I sighed, trying to shake away the gnawing feeling in my chest. "I was really worried about you-"
Suddenly, I could taste the liquor on his tongue and feel his hands on my waist as he pulled me into his chest. My body reacted to him immediately, familiarising itself with the new rhythm of rapid heartbeats. But I found myself conflicted. He had no right to disappear without reason or show up drunk at three in the morning. I was pulling away from him before I realised it. "Aiden-"
He kissed me again, tangling his fingers in my hair. "I love you,"
I tried to hold my ground and pull away again, but I could feel myself slipping under his touch. "I love you too, but we need to talk."
His only response was to press his lips into mine once more, desperate for the comfort I could somehow give him. He kissed me like he meant every word; he would promise me the world if I simply asked for it.
It was too tempting to forget about my questions and kiss him back with no intention of letting go. However, my concern pressed into my chest. "We need to stop," I told him.
But his hands continued to hold me protectively, as though I would be ripped away the second he let go. Whatever place he went to had caused a version of Aiden I thought had been long stored away. The man that kissed me now was different from the one that held me two days ago. There was something wrong with the way he spoke.
"Aiden, stop." I managed through the croak of my voice. His grip tightened. "Let me go. I don't want to do this. Let me go. Please, Aiden." I wrestled against his impossible grip, trying to get free, but it was pointless. My heart hammered in my chest as we stumbled forward, our legs catching on something in the low light. I tumbled backward, collapsing onto the floorboards and smacking the side of my head on something sharp. Pain blurred my vision. Something cold and wet ran down my temple. I squeezed my eyes shut as if it would save me from the splitting headache.
I closed my eyes and waited for the pain to go away. I waited for them to focus on Aiden, and when they did, my heart shattered. Every limb was rigid as he stared down in horror at his trembling hands. His eyes brimmed with tears as he gaped at me, muttering things under his breath I couldn't comprehend. He faltered briefly, suddenly unable to support his weight.
"I'm okay." I slowly sat up, wanting more than anything to take away the fear drowning his features. "I'm okay."
A single tear slid down his cheek, hopelessly falling to the floor beneath him. There was nothing I could say to comfort him. So I watched as Aiden fell apart in front of me, unable to help him. He crumbled to the floor and pulled me to his chest, his heart beating at an impossible rate. "I'm sorry," he cried, his voice breaking. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...." His cries turned into sobs as he held me gently, too afraid he would break me.
My tears tainted his shirt as his apologies crushed me one by one, each thicker than the last. They felt like remorseful goodbyes.