Keep your head down.
Don't make noise.
Don't disturb anyone.
These were some of the few lessons I learned early in the Hole if I wished to survive. My life support has been bundled to my wardens. These beasts have broken down the infrastructure of my mind and left only the front window hanging by a nail to view the sick bastards forever taunting me. Fuck. This brick sized window barely counts as that.
I barely remember what sound accompanies those disgusted faces. I get it! I am depriving you of your nourishment. You think I want to be stuck in a hole with you for three goddamn years? You think I haven't thought about taking my own life to finally satisfy your idiotic dreams and stop the voices in my head? Don't you think I have attempted it? When the only thing you have to look forward to is the faint blue light and the dark green slop you serve me everyday, life can become quite mundane.
For years I have dealt with my demons. For years I have barely rolled out of my rough white (now black) cloth. For years I have starved and begged. For years I have followed the rules I was conditioned to learn. For years I have grown to hate the people I used to call humans.
Now the only thing I see is animals.
Time before the Hole seems like a distant dream. Sure, the slums of New York City had been dangerous and dirty; however, at least I had freedom, family, and food on the table.
The clearest memory I have was the day of the Impact. That Sunday morning began like any other Sunday morning. I woke up to my alarm, rolled out of bed, and took a long hot shower.
Damn how I miss a hot shower.
After my shower I examined my reflection to see if any more of my peach fuzz of a beard had come in yet. Much to my surprise, none had. Instead, my narrow hazel eyes and dripping wet short jet black hair stared back at me.
I walked back out into my small apartment and looked to the short wooden coffee table and saw the usual note from my mother on top of a wrapped plate of bacon and scrambled eggs. The note simply said - 'Luke'. After my father had left when I was still young, my mother had to quickly pick up two different jobs to support my sister and I. Due to my mother's different occupations, she wasn't home too often and we lived decently humble. Unpaid bills lay next to the cold breakfast to remind me of this fact.
I remember thinking back at that moment about how ridiculous my mind saw the living situation. Dirty dishes lined the sink and furniture, laundry covered the floor, I wore clothes which I had outgrown by a few sizes, and an odd odor filled the apartment. Despite the poor standards we lived in and my eventual resignation of the financial situation which my life had been dropped, my sister still strived for more. With her being the youngest, she usually got her way while my needs fell through the floor. Everyday for the past four months my sister begged my mother to pay for her piano lessons. After constant refusals, my mother finally said yes and ended up skipping the electricity bill for the month just so my sister could get her way. Today just so happened to be my sister's first day, and luckily I was bestowed the honor of picking her up since she was not yet old enough to return home on her own. Oh Joy!
After checking the time, I realize I have a little time to eat. I quickly devoured my cold breakfast and as soon as I finished, the lights went out and the AC pumping warm air immediately shut off. Well, guess I'm not surprised. As the cold air began to creep through the air, I threw on my stained navy blue hoodie and headed out the door into the quiet snowy streets of New York City.
Bypassing the multiple people by the door huddled around a trash can on fire, I made my way to the address my mother mentioned the night before to pick up Helen. Broken beer bottles, black and yellow snow, stray animals, and torn pieces of clothing line the street as I pass by. The clouds in the sky blocked out the sun and emphasized the gloomy atmosphere on the street. I hear something or another about politics and the weather out of one of the many windows in the different rundown apartment complexes I pass.
Out of the corner of my eye, I notice a black and white striped cat attempting to rip open a sealed plastic bag in an alley and I begin to approach it to see what is going on. "Lucky", I quietly whisper as I see a perfectly intact loaf of bread.
As I jogged up, the cat screeches and quickly disappears out of sight. I inspect the bread and realize it isn't too stale and only has a little mold. A large grin grows on my face as I begin to think about the snack I will have for this afternoon as the ground and the electric lights on the walls of the alley start flashing.
I stash the sealed bag inside my hoodie and look up to see all the lights continue flashing even faster until eventually completely going out. Darkness falls on the alley and the clouds in the sky seem to take on a darker shade. My feet feel a slight sensation and a large crack can be heard in the distance. The air seems to go completely still as all other noise seems to fade into the background.
My feet feel a larger tug and once I look down, a tremor begins to fill my vision and the different trash on the alley floor begins to slightly shake. The tremor in the ground slowly increases in scale until a small buzzing noise can be heard. I start breathing heavy and my skin begins to stick to my clothing as I do a 180 turn and attempt to run out of the alley.
Along the way, the different electric lights on the wall become undone on the walls and crash into the ground. Bricks start becoming undone in the foundation of the walls, miscellaneous items fall out of windows, and metal attached to walls start to sway. Dust fills the air as I pass and dodge the different items as the shaking sensation only continues to increase and the buzzing noise slowly transforms into a static roar.
My foot snagged on a wire frame and I tripped sideways and crashed into a rusted green dumpster and turned it over. As dust filled my eyes and pain enters my every fiber from the crash, different falling items begin pelting me. A pouring rain begins to come down as soon as I struggle out of the dumpster and I finally wobble into the edge of the alleyway and view the absolutely nightmarish scene to my left.
At this point, the roar in my ears has completely shut out any other sound within the area and multiple material and substances have began messing with my vision. However, these different sensations could not compare to what was being seen through my eyes. The busy streets of New York City were packed full of people all running in one direction. People were grabbing others by their clothes and body, knocking people out of the way, and completely running over others. Cars and trucks were going well over 80 mph mowing people over and crashing into falling buildings, cars, and fallen material.
The smell of dust, blood, water and desperation filled the air as the oncoming crowd ran away from a massive wave which filled the sky. My heart dropped as I continued looking at the wave of water which seemed to reach all the way past the clouds and fill the entire horizon. I dropped to my knees as an adult woman accidentally smacked my head with her torso and I was flung to the right into the street. Shoes and sweat covered my eyes as multiple people trampled over my body. Blood and bruises began to cover my body until I felt no pain. The only thing I could see within my dimming sight was the oncoming wave absorbing people on its path. The roar continued to obliterate my eardrums until eventually the violent waters reached my body and everything went black.
That was the day my personal hell began.