Bruh, I open my eyes and it's bright as fuk... god I hope this isn't gonna be a trend ;-;. After my eyes adjust to to the new light I see... hold the fuck up is that a nipple?! Lame I'm more of an ass guy. Wait if that's a nipple...
I lift up my teeny weenie little hand up towards the nipple.
That bastard made me a fucking baby... this is so lame! I wanted to start doing cool shit immediately! Man if this was a manga or light novel it would skip this bling baby shit and get to at least pre teen shenanigans! But I'm living this shit! Again no less! Fucking cunt ass bitch skank tard bastard... ok I feel slightly better.
"Look Charlotte our son looks so healthy"
"That he does darling"
"Aww he has your beautiful green eyes"
"He has your striking white hair"
Fuck these 2 must be newly weds or somethin, I could cut the sexual tension with a damn knife! Even now they are staring at each other somethin fierce. I bet if I wasn't here but in like a crib or somethin I'd have a younger sibling on the way...
wait why is the old man holding me...
you horny fucks!
I guess while I get neglected by the fucking dogs in heat I'll try to access my status
"Sthads"
Nothing fucking happened... that bastard he really fucking did that didn't he.
"Shadbse"
You cruel bastard! Am I a joke to you!? Well fuck I can't do anything and those monkeys are getting louder ;-;.
— time skipe 3 years —
[heh serves you right]
I am a changed man. Ive been patient as waited for the day I could 100% say my first word. Out of spite I've never said "moma, or dada" that shit is for losers who don't want to fight god. Anyway ladies gentlemen the time I've been fucking waiting for and the moment I'll probably masturbate to once I'm old enough (yes that's how fuxking excited I am for this. Even half 3 can't compare!)
"S-status"
"Well I'll be damned our son's first words are status"
"Don't you think that's strange darling?"
"I think my grandfather told me a story that my father's first words were menu"
The old man said with a chuckle but he wasn't the only one chuckling. I was too. I am gonna fucking lose it. Maybe it's the wrong command or something. Nothing. Fucking. Happened. Kys god with a uncapital G
"Menu"
"Oh!? Was that a coincidence or is out boy really smart?
Those two fuckers were looking down on me. Literally because I was practicing crawling while I said my first word. Maybe there just isn't a system or rpg aspects in this world. Yeah that has to be it what else could be? (Fucking kashoot me ;-;)
[achievement: first words]
+1 int
+1 wis
I really am a joke to you huh.
Hehehehehe |
- Sire what is making you laugh so much? -
ah Yofie it's perfect you're here I grabbed another human from earth and I'm watching him fail
miserably |
- Sire... we've talked about this -
Yofie was and is the oldest angel of the god of heroes, recantation, and good. Her black curls and fair skin he had designed her to be his forever companion.
In the being they had fun just spreading joy to his other creations and undoing his sister's tantrums. She honestly doesn't know what went wrong with her creator.
c'mon Yofie you should cut lose once and a while |
- Sire you are acting like your sister
He winced at that comment. He looked hurt.
Yofie that was just mean... |
He was pouting while looking at his favorite creation
I want a hug now |
- Sire you have a meeting with your sister in 5 minutes -
please? |
She sighed and when over to the currently pouting featureless man (for ref think truth from fma)
After a few minutes she attempted to leave his embrace. He however tighter
Do I really have to meat with her? |
- Sire what are you afraid of it's just you little sister? You had the upper hand in you last confutation. -
I'd rather stay here with you I've been so tired recently and you been so busy recently my little angel~ |
At his comment her face became flushed
- Sire you made a promise to me and your sister you'd take you meetings more seriously -
She answered in the same emotionless voice although her face betrayed her voice.
Tsk you're no fun, fine all attend as long as you take a brake today the other angels can pick up the slack. And don't try to say no I can clearly see the bags under your eyes. The fact that you have bags under you eyes is honestly impressive. I didn't design you with that possibly yet here you are working yourself to the bone! |
- I- -
No buts you are gonna relax after this meeting under stand? |
- Yes Sire -
what did I tell you about calling me that when I serious? |
- R-right sorry Vexx -
ok hehehehehe |
Vexx the perked up after this
ok let's go meet that sister of mine |
- Let's -