I don't know how to interact with other people. I'm bad at talking while making eye contact. I'm horrible with crowds. I don't remember how or when I became so hopeless.
However, one thing I do know for certain is that a person cannot live entirely in isolation. No matter how much I may love my solitude, I can't remain totally by myself. So, I came up with a solution. I would adopt a false face and hide my true self. Then, I wouldn't be completely honest, but I could be a version of myself. I could continue to live in this dark, lonely world.
The world isn't entirely beautiful. Everyone knows this, but in their hearts they still wish for that perfect, idyllic place. A bit of a contradiction.
I don't care who answers me, but I need to know. Is everyone else putting on a façade, just like me? Or do most people show their true selves to the outside world? Since I can't connect with people, I suppose there's no way for me to find out the answer. Therefore, I remain alone.
I'm all right by myself.
I'm all right with being alone. I…
I want to connect with someone from the bottom of my heart.
And so I will continue to live quietly, with my eyes downcast. Alone.