Chereads / Sweet Strawberry Milk / Chapter 6 - Denial

Chapter 6 - Denial

"You were drinking and didn't invite us last night?" asked Moriou.

Ohta drank his still hot miso soup and nodded slowly. "We met at the club by chance," Ohta replied then.

"The club?!" Moriou and his two other coworkers were surprised to hear Ohta's explanation.

Ohta was not a club boy! What kind of thing forced Ohta to go to a club?!

While Ohta ate his food slowly, Nohara ate her soup quickly. It even caught the attention of the other men.

"Why the rush, Inoue-san?" asked Ohta.

"Mm, it's been almost a week since I stayed at your place. I need to find a place to live soon, so I'll continue looking for an apartment," Nohara replied.

"You don't need to rush," Ohta said.

"Right! You don't need to rush!" Moriou shouted in response, but when he saw the faces of his other two friends, he remembered something.

The two coworkers were introduced as Takahashi-san and Satou-san. They had been surprised by the presence of a woman in their senior's apartment, then heard that their senior didn't mind her staying a little longer?

Wasn't Ohta traumatized by women?!

Well, they don't know for sure, but from what they know, Ohta doesn't really like getting too close to women. And he often treats women with a very polite attitude.

"Or...I'll find an exorcist to clean up the haunted apartment downstairs," Nohara said with a pale face.

"Ahh," Moriou and Ohta chuckled blandly.

"If you guys want to help me, how about you guys find an exorcist, and I'll go find an apartment?" Nohara said.

Ohta smiled. Nohara's jokes really brighten up her morning. "Inoue-san, we will help you by asking our comrades about safe and comfortable apartments around here. I will contact you if there is any information," Ohta said.

"Thank you," Nohara smiled gently and finished her breakfast. She stood up and walked to the sink. While washing her bowl, she said casually without turning to Ohta. "Momo-chan," and Ohta immediately raised his eyebrows high. "If she calls you again, give her my regards."

Silence.

Momo-chan?

Ohta and Moriou's two co-workers didn't understand, but Moriou quickly turned to Ohta and saw his reaction. Ohta still didn't change his expression with raised eyebrows, but unexpectedly, Ohta slowly smiled. "I'll remember it."

.

Nohara actually went to various apartment agents but kept failing to find the apartment criteria she was looking for. Ohta and Moriou's apartment building is a strategic apartment building with a good price, but the only vacant unit is the haunted unit.

There's something special about why Nohara likes this place because it's close to her favourite restaurants, and only a five-minute walk away. Moreover, the environment is safe and clean, and the neighbours are relatively good. The proof, Moriou has lived there since he entered the undergraduate program.

Actually, for Nohara, it made more sense for her to seek out an exorcist now, to rid the apartment of its ghost.

So, when she arrived at Jack and Saki's bar, Nohara decided to add one last message.

"If any of you know a powerful exorcist, please contact me, okay?"

"Hey!" Jack raised one hand. "You haven't told me why you think you're bisexual!"

Nohara chuckled. She looked straight at Jack and Kou, and they both blushed in unison. Kou is straight, and Jack is bisexual. Both also have an interest in women. Moreover, Nohara is a very beautiful woman.

"A guy..." Nohara sighed. "A guy helped me get away from annoying men at the club," she replied.

Silence.

"That's it?" asked Jack.

Nohara laughed again, this time crisper than before.

"Men came up to me and said they could make me straight if I went with them. You know what that guy did?" Nohara made Jack and Kou move their bodies closer to listen enthusiastically.

"That guy came close from behind them, put his arm around their shoulders like a chad, and then told them that if they went with him, he could make them gay," explains Nohara.

Silence again.

"Woah, is he a top? What the hell, he really is an alpha, huh? His charisma… I only heard your story, but my asshole immediately throbbed," said Jack.

"Pffft!" Nohara held back her laughter, and she looked down at the bar, her shoulders shaking. "Hahaha! Aren't you a top yourself, Jack-san?! Hahahaha!"

Kou actually paled hearing that. He was straight, so he didn't understand. Alphas? Top? Charisma? Actually, he understood more or less the meaning of those words, but he didn't want to understand them any further.

"But, Jack-san," Nohara changed her whole expression to a serious one, and she smiled calmly. "That man is straight."

Jack raised his eyebrows high.

A straight man... said something like that?

Nohara swung the bloody mary in her glass while leaning her head on her hand. "How many straight men out there… would say something like that in defence of gay people like us?"

Jack leaned his body in an unprofessional posture against the bar counter. He smiled faintly with dreamy eyes.

"Was your heart skipped?" asked Jack.

Nohara looked up, saw Jack who was staring blankly at the table.

"Right. My heart was like crazy," replied Nohara.

Jack then remembered when he first met Saki. Back then... he didn't know that Saki was a man. Saki was dressed and looked very pretty as a girl. So when he got attracted to him, he thought he was straight. Jack was totally confused about his sexuality for months because as far as he knew, he was gay. When he found out that Saki was a male crossdresser, he get even more confused. He doesn't know if he's straight or gay anymore...

But then, Saki told him that he might be a bisexual.

"Your heart skipped, so that's a strong indication that you may also have an interest in the opposite sex," Jack explained.

Nohara shrugged her shoulders.

"What if this is a one-time thing?" Nohara asked.

Jack chuckled. "Would you say the same thing if you heard a man claiming to be straight, fucked 'one-time' with another man?"

Nohara looked deeply at Jack. "But I haven't even thought about sleeping with him or being his girlfriend, you know?"

"But isn't all this enough to make you doubt your sexuality to ask me?" asked Jack.

Nohara was silent.

Seeing that, Jack approached Nohara. "It feels weird, doesn't it?"

Nohara nodded.

"I often hear of my other bi-friends, who thought they were straight, but it turns out that when they have sex with the same sex, they can also get aroused," said Nohara. "However, I don't know if I can be aroused or not because of that guy."

"That's what you're worried about?" asked Jack. "Did you forget that sexual and romantic attraction can be different?"

Nohara raised her eyebrows high. "Ah," she understood. "So Jack-san said, it could be that I only attracted to him romantically, not sexually?"

"That's right," Jack explained.

"Hmm," Nohara mumbled quietly.

"Don't worry, you can find out slowly," said Jack. "But I actually doubt you fell in love with him just because of what you said earlier," he continued.

Jack-san really hit the mark.

Nohara really isn't interested in Ohta just because of what he did when he kicked out the annoying men at the club. Nohara was attracted to him somehow because Ohta loved Momoka the same way she did.

Their first serious love, Momoka.

Nohara has never doubted her sexuality before. She knows that she is attracted to women. However, loving Momoka is a different matter. Momoka was a woman who made her believe and fully accept that she is a lesbian. Even she made her feel that her decisions and judgments about her life and herself are correct.

Then came Ohta, a man who seemed to destroy all the perceptions she had built about herself. If she didn't meet Ohta, would she still believe she was a lesbian, or would she meet another man someday and experience the same doubts?

If Ohta was the only man who made her feel this way, wouldn't calling herself 'bisexual' be an exaggeration? Is this a yaoi novel? A man who had been straight his whole life met an adorable young man and then thought, 'he is the only man who makes me feel this way. I'm not gay to anyone other than him!'

But in this case, it was more fitting for Nohara that, 'he is the only man who makes me feel this way. I'm not straight to anyone other than him!'

Bullshit.

Like the yaoi novel trope, 'A man who has been straight all his life and meets his first gay partner', maybe Nohara is also bisexual?

"For now, you have a crush, right?" asked Jack, cutting off Nohara's thoughts.

Nohara nodded. "Crush," she replied.

Jack laughed. "You really admit it so easily! Hahahaha!"

Kou looked disappointed, but he smiled helplessly with Jack. He agreed. Nohara is truly a unique woman. It was rare for a woman to be able to express her feelings as clearly and as straightforwardly as this without being shy.

"In that case, just let it be. You'll find out sooner or later," said Jack.

Ohta is a man who also loves Momoka as much as Nohara loves her.

When she saw Ohta sitting in front of a power pole, heavily drunk and chanting Momoka's name, it reminded her of herself. This man... was desperate, just like she was when Momoka chose Ohta.

Ohta's annoyance at the men who annoy her, his comments about 'it's not that easy to change sexuality', gives Nohara a hint that Ohta loves Momoka, but Momoka may distance herself from him because of her sexuality.

Other little things about Ohta's basic personality also interest her. The way the man behaves like a gentleman at home shows that he was raised well, and how he remembers the small details of Nohara's habits, likes and dislikes. Nohara has an aunt, Nohara is afraid of supernatural things, Nohara likes strawberry milk—

Nohara loves Momoka, and Ohta treats her like a rival once he finds out her feelings. Ohta respects her as someone who could potentially snatch Momoka from him, not a same-sex partner just because she's a woman. Ohta respects Momoka and her sexuality. Even willing to let her have sex with someone else, as long as Momoka only loved him, and as long as Momoka's sexual partner didn't love her.

That's why, when Momoka showed that she couldn't find what she was looking for in Ohta, Ohta graciously let Momoka go.

And Ohta still loves her.

"Is it really that easy to change sexuality?" he asked, probably annoyed that he couldn't have Momoka, whose sexuality forced her to leave him.

Nohara didn't know either. But now, Nohara felt she was experiencing it.

Was Ohta the only man who made Nohara feel this way? To be honest, Nohara felt she didn't want to be bisexual. She didn't want to be attracted to Ohta. She wants to remain a lesbian.

But...

But Ohta is such a nice person. If only Ohta-san was a girl—

"Ah," Nohara shuddered as she stopped her own thoughts.

Jack looked back at her. "What is it?" he asked.

Nohara smiled in disbelief to herself. "I was just thinking, 'if only he was a girl,'" she replied.

Jack paused and once again looked surprised.

"Serious?" he asked.

Nohara nodded.

Jack pointed sharply at Nohara's face. "Here you go! You're in denial! You are totally a bisexual, and you deny the truth!"

"We're not sure yet, okay?" Nohara raised one hand with a difficult face.

"Pffft—" Jack laughed. "At a time like this, you must drink!"

"No, thank you. I have to go find an exorcist."

"Why exactly do you need an exorcist?!"