I stood realizing my blunder. I'd mentioned it offhandedly. I had completely forgotten of the presence of a third party here. "Yes, I know a spell that can make labyrinths."
"But you said it like you already had one"
"Keep it a secret ok."
"Only if you buy more clothes from me in the future."
"On the off chance I acquire more undead who need matching maid uniforms I'll call you."
She sent me a telepathy spell. 'You better.' And then turned and walked out after abruptly ending the call. "I'm charging money next time." She called back from the front yard.
"Ok see you then." I closed the door with perhaps a bit more force than was necessary. I let out an exasperated sigh. "Can't believe I forgot she was here." My pet began to strip back down to just her cloak.
"Maybe you should pay more attention to your surroundings." She said. I looked at her derisively. My girlfriend looked at her similarly. She realized what she said and what she was doing. "Ah…"
"The log in your own eye was it?"
"It's not anything either of you haven't seen before."
"The same could be said with what I did."
"But she didn't know."
"Ok, you know what? It's not a big deal. It's not much of a secret. Plus, I can always just make another one. Right? At the very least I didn't tell her how to get into it."
"Excuses, you're just trying to justify your own failure."
I looked at her. "Is that why you're pledged your loyalty to me as well?" she gave a dissatisfied sigh and left without answering. At least she has clothes now. 'The twins are back… and they're getting naked now too.'
"Well that's just great."
"What now?" my girlfriend asked.
"Remember the twins?"
"What about them?"
"They've made their way into my labyrinth and apparently they're naked too."
"Well… I'm going to take a shower and go to bed. You join me when you're done dealing with whatever nonsense those two want."
"They probably turned themselves into undead thinking I'd take them back if they did."
"Would you?" her eyes seemed concerned.
"It is one way to ensure they stop with the unwelcomed advances."
She rolls her eyes. "Whatever. If you still feel like sharing a bed with me by the end of the night, you'll come back and meet me in bed before the sun sets."
"Noted."
With that I teleported myself back to the dungeon with quill parchment and empty inkwell in hand. "Bleed into this and we'll make a contract."
"Wait… seriously? Just like that?"
"I have somewhere to be in a few minutes, so I'd like for this to finish before then."
Similarly, to the last time this contract was created I had the twins put down very self-sacrificing conditions in the contract and I hastily scribbled a very self-serving condition. Once the spell was cast, they were essentially my slaves. I then cast a radiant resistance spell on them so they could attend school as usual, as in without having to worry about the vampiric famous weakness they just got in the hopes I'd take them back. "My first command."
"Yes?" they asked expectantly.
"Continue your daily lives as usual telling no one either that you're a vampire or that you're my familiar. If you can do well as my subordinates, I might grant you a similar reward to hers." I point behind them to my pet lich, she waved. "Well… I'll summon you if I need anything of you, keep in touch."
And with that I teleported away before they could object to my order. When I arrived not only was the sun still up but there was still time to join her in the shower. After a fairly eventful night I had a very restful sleep and a nice enough breakfast. Shortly after my pet showed up with the twins naked beneath her arms carrying them like luggage.
I looked at my pet with a spiteful gaze. "They wouldn't stop bugging me." She replied.
"All of you! Clothes! Now!" I shouted. They disappeared and reappeared in clothes. "The breakfast table is no place for nudity."
My pet returned the glance I gave her yesterday. "Now who's the hypocrite?" she asked staring at my girlfriend and I sitting eating breakfast wearing only smiles… or we were before they showed up. "I meant your nudity. I don't want to be seeing other naked girls first thing in the morning."
"Yeah, me neither" my girlfriend replied.
"You two, go home." The twins left with a strange expression as if they were embarrassed but also saddened. "You, pour me some coffee." My pet gave an exasperated sigh.
"Just because I'm dressed as a maid, you're going to start treating me like one?"
"You're only just realizing that now?" she sighed again.
After we got dressed, we got ready for school and started our first day back all of my teachers decided to do a pop quiz. I managed to pass every single one without having to struggle much. Fairly simple these questions were.
Eventually, the school day was coming to a close and the magic club advisor brought me into her office for a bit. "Did you learn Abyssal?"
"I did. Why?"
"There's an abyssal spell that's only passed down verbally from master to student traditionally. I hear the first Infernal mage cursed this spell in particular so it could only be verbally communicated."
"So, what does this spell do?"
"This." She opened up a hexagonal box big enough to fit a small child. Inside was a girl who looked like if the teacher standing proudly before me was half my age.
"Is this some kind of familiar?"
"No, you idiot, it's a clone spell. If I die, I'll simply live again through her."
"Ah… you summon a false body that will become real when you die?"
"It's far from false and though it can wake up while I'm still alive I prefer not to do that."
"Why's that?"
"When I die and she wakes up automatically, she gains the memories I had before I died, but if I die while she's awake she doesn't get any memories except the ones she had when she woke up… also this spell takes a long time for it to resolve."
"I'll bet you have to die to get the intended results."
"No, the body itself has to take time to develop."
"Is that why it still looks like a child?"
"No, I just prefer to start my new life after dying as a child, so no one hits on me for a few years."
"Ah… so you plan on teaching me this spell now?"
"Better than an hour before you need it."
"With my luck it probably is."
There was a knocking at the door. The teacher quickly resealed the hexagonal box which I now saw was a coffin and threw a blanket over it. "Come in," she replied. The club vice president entered the room. "I hope I'm not interrupting."
"No, she was just about to pass down a spell to me orally."
She smacked me, "phrasing."
"Yeah phrasing." The vice president replied.
"So what are you doing here? Did you have a question for the advisor?"
"No. I actually came to give you back your grimoire."
"Oh, thank you. I'm sure this will make for some great information exchanges in the future as this particular brand of magic is notoriously confusing and irritating to learn."
"About that can you teach me how to use it?"
"Do you know a transmutation mage?"
"You really are aiming for that 'Jack of all trades master of none' title. Aren't you?" the advisor asked.
"It never hurts to learn more magic especially one that's so vital to alchemy."
"You're not planning on becoming an artificer, are you?"
"No but it couldn't hurt to be able to fix my own magical tools when their usefulness expires as opposed to replacing them or having some idiot over charge me to fix them when it would be cheaper to replace them."
The advisor gave a knowing nod and the vice president just gave a tired sigh. "I do know one but she's probably going to want you to teach her too."
"Schedule a time and a place to meet and I'll teach you both."
"It's not that simple. She's across the continent"
"I have a teleportation necklace we could go in an evening. But first." I turn back to the club advisor. "I believe you were about to give me a spell."