May 15.
Dear small part of my abyss of my thoughts,
About a week has passed and My grandfather started calling me Nipotina. I think it's kinda sweet and it's nice that he's trying... Or just really good at acting like he is. I also finally have everything in my room decorated how I want it. I made sure that everything was perfectly placed on the shelves, occasionally jumping or crawling over to the shelves while the men and women had been placing things to change little details. so I'd be perfect Mig said I was a perfectionist and OCD. I said I was just specific and that I hadn't been diagnosed so there was no confirmation. I have basically crawled and jumped everywhere unless I made Mig carry me as I have been completely disregarding the crutches I had been told to use. I also learned I have no cameras in my room or stuff like that luckily... Maybe because mig is almost always with me, I've told him a few things and have been testing him with certain things like building homemade audio recorders out of cute little things and he actually keeps my secrets just between him and i. Also my 'burner phone' that i bought was just to throw off everyone who was watching me. I acted like nobody knew about it and didn't talk about it... I knew they tapped into it and if I was asked I said it was a back up phone... Which it was. I didn't even try to arm it well, but I did still have my original burner phone from back before my family was killed along with cash. I know they didn't know about it. The combat knife that I had hidden in the bathroom the first day I kept hidden on me at all times. I read through the entire file... And holy shit may I just say, THIS FAMILY IS FUCKED UP! Apparently I'm albino and have like seven brothers, my father and uncle run a mafia together and live with my other 'Uncles' and my 'aunt', they aren't biologically related. Their hitman/woman Maja is the only female to survive so far in that family... My biological mother died along with all the others wifes or daughters... The little girls that were born didn't make it past 2 months old. I'm not sure if my grandmother was saving me from death or getting revenge on father for not telling her that my 'mom' was pregnant with me and my two other brothers. She seems that petty from my research and that probably is where I got it. Also Marco is albino and that's where I got that from. He just dyed his hair and eyebrows.. He's actually African/Italian and his first wife was korean and they had my uncle Eren. Then his next wife was Black, Mexican and Korean, and they had my mother Emilia. My mom married my uncle/her brothers best friend Toshi aka my father and my father and uncle started a mafia together to get back at grandfather and everyone in said mafia lives together in a huge fucking mansion and they all have there own rooms.. Besides the two boys who are my triplets. They're pretty much inseparable. My stuiped grandfather got a lot meaner I guess after his second wife died and it's a shit show. Annnyyywwwwwaaaayyyyy ,Mig and I are pretty good friends besides his dirty/flirty comments almost every time I talk to him... Anyway I need sleep and this concludes day eight.
~Fuck My Life, A.B. 💣💥
After I was done writing in my journal, I doodled on the page next to it a little bit like I had been between writing, then I ripped out the page I had written on. Then grabbed my black lighter that had blue flames on the side and I lit the page on fire. The corner of the page engulfed in flames started spreading to the entire page. I watched the blues, reds, oranges, and yellow consume the page slowly. I wave my fingers through the flames a few times as the page burns my dead skin cells.
Playing with fire never hurt me, it didn't scare me either... Ace said differently, he said I was afraid of fire but the situation was quite the opposite. I blow out the fire when there's only a blank burnt corner left of the page. The smoke smell fills my senses as I watch it escape through the air.
I crush and rub the remaining ashes on my hand and fingers as I keep my thoughts running through my mind. I put my empty journal in the raven black nightstand besides my bed. I grabbed a few labeled remotes to turn on my LED anime and fairy lights that filled my room.
For some reason even with my light sensitivity these lights didn't bother me. I knew the lights were kinda basic, but it was pretty so I didn't care about other people's opinions. I used a different remote to turn off my main lights then put them all back in my nightstand and flip onto my stomach to sleep.
Marcos POV
"Mr.Cortez, please sit." I say looking at the young mexican who is watching over my granddaughter. After he sits down I start talking.
"Any updates?" I ask him. "Not really sir, she doesn't really do much besides reading, writing, drawing, listening to music, and watching tv. Her wounds are healing slowly and will be fully scabbed by tomorrow morning. She is getting really sick of the bandages and not being able to move but still hasn't tried to escape... She doesn't show almost any emotion, her face just stays looking numb almost all of the time besides when she gets irritated, the first night was the time she showed the most emotion. She's always on guard but doesn't get too close to anyone much. But she seems to be doing fine." Manuel says very seriously.
I felt like he had been leaving out a few things but ignored it. I dismissed him and grabbed a picture book.
I knew Atom had trust issues and had probably said a few things here but used humor to cover it up. I saw her do it while we ate dinner together.. She had trauma, and her only way to stop it manifesting worse was humor.
Her mother Emilia was the same way.. No matter how difficult things got she would make a joke then move on and almost always kept to herself, never saying something she would regret. Eren on the other hand was very expressive.
Growing up he would always have a big smile or grumpy frown on his face. I traced the picture of my family together. I almost laughed looking at my son trying his best to look serious.
Then his sister staring at the camera with her skin tone making her beautiful eyes popping out. A beautiful black Mexican mixed woman, my second wife was holding on to my shoulder beside me in her beautiful white pantsuit that complimented her beautiful chocolate skin perfectly.
I missed my girls and little boy. The only one I have left alive was my ragazzo. (Translation from Italian: Boy)
But he said our relationship was ruined beyond repair. None of my grandsons could take over my gang, I couldn't get close to them.. And I knew none of them were the right ones for this job.
Then there was Atom, my beautiful granddaughter. She was the one. She had everything it took to be my heir. "Excuse me, sir." My blonde assistant said, coming into my office.
"We have some issues with operation La prossima regina della mafia." She said holding some papers. (La prossima regina della mafia. Translation from Italian : The next mafia queen.) I look up at her raising an eyebrow.
"Yui and Kanjiharu found out you have Atom." She said in a very serious tone.