“Every time people touch me, all I can see is me in my room,” I said as my voice grew louder and I moved a bit away from him. “I can’t breathe. I can't move. I don’t want to feel anything because when I do I always get hurt in the end. And I’m tired of it. I’m tired of this pain. Why won't it just stop?”
Elliot was looking at me as he covered his mouth and he didn’t have anything to say. He reached out trying to pull me into his arms and I tried to move away, but we had a scuffle until I gave up and I just felt his arm wrapped around me. I ended up crying against his chest and I don’t know how long we sat there or cared if people saw us, but I just felt exhausted after saying all that to him. Mentally or physically… I’m not sure anymore. Maybe this was all that emotion that I’ve kept to myself and I never wanted to express.
