"Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes." - Carl Jung
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When I open my eyes, I am no longer in the forest, the cat gone from my arms. Instead, I'm standing on a beautiful tropical beach. The sky is orange and pink, fading into deep purple hues as the sun hangs low. The water acts as a calm pool, reflecting the colours above. I take a deep breath and close my eyes once more. The salty sea air fills me, my body relaxing where I stand. In the distance, I can hear the seagulls squawking among the various other birds flying above.
I turn, opening my eyes again to take in the scenery around me. The sand is met with grass spots and scattered crystal clusters, leading to a cliff that houses a dense forest. Tall, looming trees, thick bushes, and flowers I've never seen before. To my left is a waterfall, painted with the colours of a rainbow, originating from a white, castle-like building. The pale stone glittered brilliantly like a crystal in the remaining sunlight, with pillars lining the structure and large windows.
The more I gaze at the structure, a powerful sense of longing washes over me. I've been here before; I'm sure of that. My only question is how that's possible, as I'm sure this place doesn't even exist.
The wind picks up into a light breeze, carrying a sweet, tantalizingly flawless voice. Just like in the forest, the faint song-like words are in a language I've never heard and without a body—no one is here but me. There's no movement besides the gentle rolling waves of the ocean. What the hell is going on?
"Morana." I jump at the new, static-filled voice. A rush runs through my body, and a swell of emotions I can't decipher bubbles within. It can't be. Whipping around, I find myself face-to-face with the man who haunts my dreams, his features still hidden in shadows. His eyes are a piercing ice-blue that could chill even the warmest of fires, and his hair is an inky black, unkempt shaggy style that hangs lightly on his head, some strands falling into his eyes.
'Is this the afterlife?'
A chuckle comes from the man in front of me before he reaches out. I sigh, eyes fluttering shut as my body willingly melts into this stranger. I feel at peace, safe.
"No, this is not death," he assures, resting his forehead against mine. His deep, hypnotizing eyes peer into mine, shining with a fierce adoration... and something else. "This is simply another dream."
"I saw you this morning, while at therapy and I wasn't dreaming. How was that possible? Who are you? What is this place?" The questions slip out before I can even think. I sense the man smile, eyes lighting up slightly.
"This was once your home, little fox," he replies simply, hands cupping my cheeks gently.
"My what? You're not making any sense." I shake my head free, pulling my eyebrows together.
A humorless chuckle escapes him as he steps back slightly, dropping his arms. "You'll see in time."
"I don't understand. Who are you?" I search his hidden face, unsure of what it is I'm looking for. Slowly, the shadow begins to dissolve, leaving only a thin veil still cloaking him.
"My name is . . ." His voice fades out as he tries to speak his name. He stands straight and I have to tilt my head a bit to see his blurry face as he was at least 6'5.
"Wha-what? Your name is what?" I try to keep calm, but his lack of appearance makes me uneasy.
"You must find your true self. You need to come back to me. You need to be . . ." He trails off, my vision becoming disoriented.
Everything starts spinning, and colors swirl together. I start to get dizzy as the world around me twists and turns. The air is being sucked out of me and I have a hard time breathing. Finally, after feeling my heart start to race, everything just stops. I wasn't dizzy, I wasn't panting, I wasn't spinning. It was black. Nothing but darkness around me. I can feel it starting to consume me, until it's no more, and I take my last breath.
My eyes open and I quickly sit up with a gasp, my chest feeling tight. I breathe deeply through my nose, attempting to calm my erratic heart. Gone was the man and the beach, as well as the forest. There is no noise aside from my panting and my thundering pulse.
"Thank Goddess you're awake."
"Where the fuck am I?" I ask aloud, my eyes adjusting to the dim atmosphere. The snow leopard sits at my side, and the injured feline lay in my lap.
"This is the Shadow realm," the snow leopard says, tilting its head at me. I stare at it, hoping my face matched my confusion.
"I'm sorry, what?" I move my head, immediately regretting it. Bringing a hand to my temple, I wince at the budding headache.
"A pocket realm mirroring your own within the shadows. This place was known to many as the Sacred Cove, and I am Syr."
"How did I get here?" I wonder, my eyes roaming over my newest environment. It looks like a vast cave. The walls and floors are adorned with crystal clusters, much like the beach from my apparent dream.
"You brought us, Morana." My attention turns back to the leopard-Syr, mouth going slack. "I am so glad you found us. We have a lot to discuss."
"There's no way any of this is real," I begin. "One moment I'm in the forest, about to be killed by some crypt keeper motherfucker, then a beach with some strange guy, and now a cave? That I apparently brought us to. I don't - what, did I magically teleport myself here?" I snort at the absurdity of it all.
"The attack and this place are very much real. You brought us here through your ability to manipulate shadows and darkness, Morana." Syr's calm voice rings in my ears, leaving me speechless.
"No. Uh-uh. Nope. This is some inception shit. A dream within a dream within a fucking dream. This isn't real. Janet was right, I've lost my marbles." I ramble, anxiously picking at my cuticles again, hoping it would wake me up.
"You have not gone insane," Syr shakes her head, eyes closing briefly. "You are being called to awaken, Morana. I wish I could tell you everything, but that is not my job. As your guide, I am meant only to show you the way. You must earn the sacred knowledge, much like Odin and Lady Freya herself."
The ghostly feline tells me that she is supposedly one of my spirit guides. She apparently led me to the injured cat in my lap in hopes that I would take him home as my familiar, and a protector. The leopard-Syr tells me that not only is the cat a gift from the Goddess Freya, but that Syr is the deity's messenger as well.
I groan in frustration, throwing my body back to the ground. Staring at the stone ceiling, I clench my jaw, pursing my lips to keep myself silent. Finally, I turn to Syr, hand reaching for the feline in my lap.
The explanation only served to make my headache worse, and I find myself in disbelief.
"Wait, you said I can control shadows, and that it's not my only ability. If that's the case, then what else can I do?"
"I cannot tell you, Morana. I've already said too much. You must return to your realm, to your journey." Syr responds, a touch of sadness within her voice. I open my mouth to respond, but she quickly continues, "Now, return to your place."
Syr raises to sit on her hind legs and reaches one of her paws to my forehead.
"Listen to your intuition, it is your most powerful tool." Syr's voice fades into silence as a bright, white light envelopes me, lifting my body slightly. She disappears with the light, and the tingling sensation from the forest returns, my stomach churning. I feel like I'm going to be sick.
And just as I blink, I'm no longer in the dim cavern, but in my own messy bedroom, the injured feline still nestled in my lap. Settling the two of us on my bed, I lay facing the cat, taking in his sleeping features in the moonlight.
"I guess that it's just you and me, buddy," I whisper, gently stroking his head. "I hope you're happy here, Nox."
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