A tragedy in life - worst change

Do you know what does you have to face as an younger child in any family???? Ofcourse you all ,but my life is quite different from all I am such an child who never cry if my mom is not nearer to me .From my childhood I was dark shaded boy with fatty body people ask me 'mottu'.From my second standard I never ask my father to get me a pencil or a pen . Because whenever I got money to spend on canteen then I buy it . As an soft hearted person I try to help people but lot's of time I got cheated.Like once I give a 50 rupee note to a blind beggar and in next moment he is acting as an 'dumb and deaf' and another moment he is acting as a handicapped person through sitting on a wheelchair. I don't know but I think I am a very principal following person because I never break my principles like not spitting everywhere on road , never threwing garbage in open , not littering the street , never eat food before cleaning kitchen to satisfy my soul . I also had a big family of 17 people's along with two older brothers who wears only brand new clothes . They buy clothe twice in a year and I buy clothes once in two years because I believe that it's man nature and behaviour makes a man good looking and gentlemen. We all was living an very balanced life . But we all know an tragedy can change your life style . Time forced all to walk according to him. My father got a disease name TB (tuberculosis) . And one fact was that we get to now about it after 4 months of my father illness. My father spend four months on bed . All our income comming ways was blocked. Now my brother's never ask my father to buy clothes. The covid 19 has come it spoils all of my happiness. Because of blockage in our income roads the debts was start increasing because my father never saves money . He buys a land on village not at any costly area where we get the rent atleast. But it's not my father's fault it's our time which forced us to spent such wrist time all of my family go to village because life in a city is very costly . As compared to village. But I am doing my studies so I refuse to live with my family and choose to complete my studies by living alone and cooking my food by itself . It's really hard for me to do all till 9 months . My father ask me come to village . You can't get anything through cheap studies at now time study needs investment. An investment of money then time . I ask him to give me sometime I am struggling here I don't know what god's written in my destiny. But as bhagwad Geeta say's. ' karam karr fall ki chinta matt karr -- do your work don't worry about result . I was still going on .