I follow John with my eyes away from the kitchen, while I turn my back to the other two, bringing my attention to the oven, from which I extract the meat scattered between the large slices of potatoes, as Alex likes it.
I close my eyes as that perfume invades my nostrils: I put the pan on the counter, then prepare the dishes and place them on the table,trying to distract myself from all what is happening between me and my man.
I look at Andrew, intent on fiddling with his phone, while I realize that Alex is not there, most likely he has gone to the bathroom.
Without thinking twice I approach the sofa and, without arousing suspicion in his friend, I elegantly take Alex's phone from the sofa: I run to my room, but as soon as I cross the threshold I find Alex in front of the wardrobe, looking for a garment .
I immediately hide the phone behind me, while I lose myself staring at his half-naked body: I haven't touched his skin for days, damn it!
I linger on every inch of his back, taking advantage of the fact that he is turning his back to me , and I force every single particle of my body not to run to him and kiss him, put my hands on his chest, jump on him ...
I sink my lower lip between my teeth as I think about the fact that there's a woman that feels the same about him too.
And that he satisfied her. Or continues doing it.
"I know you're staring at me. What's wrong?"- his tone brings me back to reality, surely he expected me to complain about something, as I have often done lately.
I just lower my eyes: even his impudence is attractive to me right now:
"Nothing." - I answer with an air of indifference, while he turns around cursing.
I hurry up to my pillow, then hide the phone from his eyes.
I leave the room, not before having given him a last look.
***
"It's delicious! Every time I try to bake meat in the oven it gets dry! "- John compliments while our boyfriends continue to eat in silence.
"The secret is tinfoil." - I wink at him.
"Fuck, I hadn't thought of that! How do you know everything? "-he complains with his mouth full of food.
"My mother is a cook!" - I jokingly boast, making him roll his eyes.
I laugh spontaneously, after a long time, in fact Alex notices it, since he looks at me out of the corner of his eye and assumes a thoughtful expression.
«I'm going to sleep, today I'm really tired.» - Juliet gets up from the table sulking and as soon as I realize it, I feel more and more guilty.
The fact that Alex and I aren't having a good time has nothing to do with her, yet I haven't talked to Alex about it yet.
I see her close the door behind her and try to hide my heartbroken face.
«Next time I'll take her back again.» - John rejoices.
"Hold back the hormones." - Andrew reacts calmly to his boyfriend, giving him a bad look.
"It's not my fault he's the Colton Haynes sosia."-he defens himself with a proud face.
"Who are you talking about?" - Alex interjects, and then sips a glass of wine.
«Of Juliet's teacher.» - Andrew answers in John's place.
"Come on, he has a fucking face!" - Alex rolls his eyes, and I do everything not to answer him badly and worsen our condition.
"Precisely. Have you met him yet? "- Andrew insists, but Alex just nods, answering with a cold tone:
"You too, apparently."
"Not in person, but this jerk did nothing but send me pictures of him during that dinner." -Andrew answers, but when I realize his words I almost choke on the water, then glare at John.
If Alex finds out I spent that evening with Louis, he will kill me right now without repenting.
"What dinner?" -he asks soon after, so I close my eyes.
"The night I told you John was crazy about the chief's son." - Andrew says those words without knowing the hell he would unleash.
I keep my eyes closed, waiting for Alex to yell at me, but the silence forces me to open them.
I meet his gaze that makes me stop breathing: his anger makes me shiver.
"Everything is clear now." -he brings the glass back to his lips, without losing eye contact with my eyes.
Her calm is more threatening than his expression, but I can't keep silent:
"What is clear?" - I try hold his eyes, but I jump when he throws the glass on the ground, and then stands up and walk to our bedroom with a soft step.
I remain impaled with my mouth open: who knows what is going through his head right now.
I come back to reality, with the intent of apologizing to Andrew, but he anticipates me:
"I didn't know..."-he starts saying.
«It doesn't matter.» - I interrupt him with a slow and trembling voice.
«Let's leave them alone.» - I mentally thank John, who gets up, followed by his boyfriend, and then gives me a kiss on the cheek and walks to the door, knowing how much I would like them to go away right now.
I rest my head on my hands, but as soon as I hear the door close, I can't see anymore because of anger and I go to my room to reach that man.
"You're an asshole, Alex! How did you think ...»-I start complaining as soon as I enter my bedroom, but I stop suddenly when he rushes to me, slamming me against the wall, while his irregular breathing hits my face.
"Did you like it?" - he growls, bringing his hands to the sides of my head.
"What?" - my question comes in the form of a whisper.
"Fucking with him." - his jaw contracts, as I lose control at those words and raise a hand with the intention of slapping him, but he stops me.
He grabs my wrist, squeezing it between his fingers and the wall next to my head: I make a grimace of pain, but it is nothing compared to the harm that his thoughts about me are doing to me.
"You're out of your mind." - I say, as I feel the tears come to my eyes.
"You wore that dress to provoke him ..." - his doesn't seem like a question, but a confirmation.
I start to tell him to stop, but he brings his hand to my hips, making me miss a beat.
"He looked at your legs." - the tightening around my wrist increases, while his fingers brush my thigh.
"He touched you ..."
«Alex, you're hurting me!» - I try to free my hand, but it is impossible for me given his strength.
His pupils return to normal size as they move away from my eyes for a split second to look to the side of my head.
He jumps away, and then puts a hand through his hair in frustration, as soon as he what he was doing.
I do not have the courage to say anything after seeing him in such conditions: I lower my head at the exact moment in which he passes me and then slams the door behind me, leaving me amazed and almost frightened, with the fingers of the other hand around my wrist.
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