Chereads / Lysa / Chapter 6 - Will You Love Me?

Chapter 6 - Will You Love Me?

Pictures coated the entire room. He thought, at first, that they were all moments she wanted to remember, and then he looked more closely. Curiosity got the better of him when he found that stark realisation… they were all of him. Every single photo was him… and no one else. Not even Lysa. Photos of him in class, photos of him walking down the corridor, photos of him sat idly in the mess room while his friends chatted away - obnoxious of his presence. Photos of him in his room. Sleeping, eating, dressing. In every possible aspect of life this girl had managed to capture at least one photo of him… apart from him smiling.

'It had to be harassment,' He thought at first as he stood in silence, 'What have I done?'

A tap on the shoulder. His body suddenly froze as she stepped around him. She picked up his hands and stared passionately into his eyes. Her smile was so wide it was almost sinister, and it was as if she had never blinked ever since he had arrived at her front door. So bright. Her sea blue eyes seemed to penetrate every part of his body. She was beaming with so much happiness he could feel it. He could hear her emotion screaming, yet nothing needed to be said.

"I waited…" she began slowly picking each word with thought, whispering in his ear, "So long. You never let me tell you. I tried… so hard to do this, and finally… finally you're here. This wasn't the ideal way, but… but you have to know how I feel about you."

"I…" He answered.

"Shhh, I'm talking," she whispered as she placed her finger on his lips, "I've been watching you for so long. Even when you were with her… that… that bitch, and when she left, I knew that… I needed, no need, to look after you."

She paused and inhaled deeply, her eyes trained on him.

"I love you, so much. I'd do anything. Anything, just to be with you. You make me whole. You make me happy. You make my life have meaning. Just seeing you, and sitting next to you feels like… feels like… I can't even describe it. I don't even feel guilty for showing you this. I need… need you to know how much I love you, and how much I want… need you to be mine."

"I…" He started.

"Will you love me?" She asked, interrupting him again, her bright eyes staring at his.

He didn't know what to say. He felt feelings sure, but they were all dampened. Like he could notice them but not really 'feel' them. Lysa was amazing: smart, dependable, beautiful. However, to him she resembled Leora too much. She was too much. He wasn't ready for another relationship. He invested himself too much in the last one and he felt like dying after she left. He couldn't do it again. Not right now.

"Lysa, I'm really sorry… I can't, I'm not in the right headspace…" He said slowly, trying to keep eye contact.

It took a second for her to realise what he had just said, however the impact was devastating to watch. Her broad happy smile slowly dispersed and the colour of her eyes that were so vivid suddenly drained themselves to a dull blue grey. It was as if her soul left her, yet her body was still there. She fell to her knees, as if her legs no longer functioned anymore, but she still managed to maintain eye contact with him. He didn't know what else to say, so he, unwillingly, started to leave. As he made his exit, he suddenly felt a tug from his shirt. She held onto it somewhat tightly – as if it were her final hope.

"Please stay…" She said fleetingly.

"I'm sorry Lysa… I just can't," He answered sadly.

After he left, she lay on the floor. She felt empty. As he left, she felt as if she was watching the final exchange from a third person's view. She couldn't describe how she felt in any other way, and then a thought. Just one. That would send her down a route of no return.

'He's trying to test you.'

It only needed to be 'said' once, and suddenly the burning flame of hope returned. A harsh fire returned to her eyes. An unstable determination. A want, no need, that couldn't be quenched until he returned her ever-growing feelings.