*Sorry that the chapter was that long, I felt teary at everything that was going on.... I love my boys so very much :-( *
*
Strawberry
I wasn't sure what brought me to her room that morning.
I wasn't sure why I strangled her on Tuesday.
And I definitely wasn't sure why I wanted to kill Court.
But I am backing up to after Mistress had asked Cream to go and check on Mel leaving her with me and Coco.
I was still staring at my good.
Coco, still staring at me like.he wanted to kill me when she said "Tell him"
"You shouldn't have strangled her!" Coco snapped at me "She's not like us, if you haven't noticed. She's softer, she's way more fragile.... She's a GIRL! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!"
I had said nothing at first as he suddenly cursed.
Mistress raised an eyebrow at him and he muttered an apology before sighing and saying "I.... I don't know Mistress. I like her"
Her eyes softened "I know"
"WE all like her, difference is, Ber doesn't want to accept it" Coco said "I.... She's not like any of the women I know. She.... She reminds me of you Mistress"
"Me?"
"A younger you" He said then faced me "You agree, don't you Ber?"
I said nothing at first before saying "I hadn't meant to strangle anyone"
"But you did"
"But I did" I said "It's just.... It's always new for me... Loving someone.... And she IS different. What if she doesn't want us?"
"Why wouldn't she want us?" Chocolate asked, confused.
I faced him "If you haven't noticed, loving four people and now another new person out of nowhere isn't normal?"
"Normal is bad" Coco replied with a shrug.
I sighed "You're hopeless"
"Love doesn't need to have a why Berry"
I turned to Mistress as she smiled at me "Do you remember my reaction when you had said you loved me?"
I looked away, feeling myself blush "Y...yes"
"I had asked why you loved me and what was your reply?"
"I didn't know"
"See?" She says "You didn't say you loved me because I was nice to you, or because we matched or give a reason even though I'm sure you have. At that moment, your brain and heart worked as one and answered honestly. I have no idea why I fell in love with all of you Berry, but I do. Fighting it at first was the hardest thing I did but accepting it came easier for me"
I had said nothing, scrunching my hand around my ball.
Because I always had it.
Because I always wasn't sure of how to feel or what to do so I was always squeezing.
After Mistress had let us go, Coco had given me a hug, saying that he loved me and ran off to her room as Cream and I always stayed in mine.
Till this morning....
After I lay with Vanilla, wondering about how to deal with the conflicting feelings until I wrap my arms around her and feel the storm in my had settle immediately, I realized I loved her.
Loved her madly, and deeply.
That when I came back into my room and sat back on the bed, and saw Cream lying on my bed, his red lips looking so rose like....
I realize he was probably having it way harder than I was.
He possibly liked her too, but being loyal to me, he always stayed around me, making sure I didn't feel alone about everything that was going on....
Cream was so perfect.
I hold his hand to my face and kiss it as his eyes open and he yawns "Why are you awake? Did you go opening the doors so Vanilla tries to escape again?"
I chuckle, rubbing his hand now "You know about that?"
He nods, now sitting up as he used his free hand to rub his face and move closer to me, resting his head on my chest "Yes"
I keep playing with his hands as he looks up at me "Are you okay Ber?"
"Do you love her?"
He looks down "Yes, I love Mistress"
"I mean Vanilla"
"Oh" He replies, looking back up "Yes"
I gulp "For... For how long?"
"Since the first day she came" He replies "Why are you asking?"
I keep focusing on his hand, feeling tears threaten to come out "Its just.... You don't even try talking to her, and I know you never talk to her.... What if she hates you?"
"Vanilla doesn't have the heart to hate" He replies "It's obvious, she can't hate anyone, and she doesn't hate you either"
"It's just...."
"I chose staying with you cause I know we have her forever, you..." He nuzzles his nose on my neck "You love her but you're still so scared"
I know I did....
But hearing him say it....
"You're always so scared" He whispers, now placing kisses on my neck "Especially when you try so hard to hide it and I see you squeezing that ball and I'm breaking.... You don't always have to hide your feelings"
I sigh "What if she doesn't like us?"
"She DOES" He says "I can't and will not think of another alternative. If she does not, IF, which I strongly doubt, we would make her love us, all five of us"
He's now licking my ear, nibbling on it as I let out an hiss "Cream....."
"We haven't had sex since she came" He replies, moving back as he pouts "And I think you need...."
I suddenly pin him down to the bed as I tower over him and kiss him.
My hands still press his down as he wraps his legs around me, rubbing his hard on that touches me through my trousers as I pull away and hiss, removing my hard cock and letting it rub his.
He lets out a moan, arching his waist to press me more as I feel his precum slide on me and I hiss, before letting him go and searching through my wardrobe, bringing out lube and going back to him, rubbing around his hard on.
He closes his eyes, letting out a gasp as his hands reach out for mine that's wrapped around his.
The lube slips off him, now going down, as I still keep jerking him before I use one of my hands to go down and put in a finger.
"Fuck!" He curses, jerking now as his toe curls and he moves up.
I curse too, the heat warming me up as I remove my hand and enter him.
He sucks in, his eyes widen as I curse again, louder this time as I stay inside him.
His eyes slowly come down, as he stares at me with drowsy eyes "Fuck me Ber"
And I did.
I pull out then thrust in harder as he closes his eyes again as I bend down to him, my hand still rubbing his erection as I thrust faster.
He opens his mouth to moan again but I bend down and kiss him, biting and pulling on his lower lip as his hands wrap around my body moving up to get me deeper as I curse again and he moans.
Then I bend down to his neck, biting then move to his nipples.
My other slippery hand moves to his nipples, squeezing as I suck on the other one.
"Ah.... Shit... Fuck...."
Hearing him let out those curses sees to drive me insane as I bite into his nipples and he jerks "I'm... I'm about to cum..."
I feel me too.
"Shit" I curse again, thrusting in faster until he opens his drowsy eyes that make me lose my senses and say "I love you"
That I cum.
He cums too, all over his chest before I pull out and pull him on my body, kissing him.
He kisses me back and pulls away "Say it back you scoundrel"
I smile "I love you too"
After we showered and slept, getting ready for school was easier because Mel had come to wake us up and seeing me smiling had left him stupefied but I kiss the shock away.
At school, I see Vanilla and Coco, and though I want to run, run away from her, Cream is holding me tight, his hands on mine....
I can hear him say in my head 'I love you'
And I stay out.
Mistress had said she would not be able to tell her happy birthday but she had something planned for her that involved all of us that I kept looking forward to until lunch....
Until I see her take a punch that makes blood come out of her mouth and I see red.
I have no idea when I'm at Court...
All I see is Vanilla.....
Her smiling at Coco everytime he picked her from school.
The look of surprise when Cream gave her her gift.
And her smell when I held unto her in the morning....
Then her touch....
Just as I drowned in my pain, in HER pain, and I lost myself...
She reaches out to me, her scent bringing me back to Earth as she holds me and stutters for me to let him go.
And I see Court.
Or what looks like him.
I let him go and turn around.
She's looking at me, tears still in her eyes as she shakes her head at me "Ber...."
Her voice....
She....
Talked...
For his sake...
Why do I want to kill Court more now?
I look at the blood on her lips and sigh, using my thumb to wipe it but the blood on my hand just makes a smidge on her face as I say "Let Cream take you home"
Her eyes widen at me and I realize she had baby blue eyes....
Just like Mel and Coco....
I slowly realize the hall is quiet and everyone is staring at her... At us as I look up at the boys.
Cream staring with worry.
Mel looking like he would break very soon.
And Coco who still has that smile on his face, but the bat dripping blood in his hand made me remember what he did.
But he didn't seem to care....
Not about Court...
They all had their eyes on Vanilla.
And so did I.
I smile, kissing her forehead "Go home, we'd be on our way soon. I'd take Court to the hospital"
"P... Promise?"
She sounds like a five year old trying to talk for the first time.
I love it.
I love her.
I nod "I promise"
And I wasn't planning on breaking it.