Yu Tu sat in the driver's seat and drove the car slowly out of the underground car park.
There were only the two of them in the car. Qiao Jing Jing was sitting in the back seat and holding Yu Tu's driver's license —— she didn't know what had possessed her to take his driver's license. Now, it did not seem right to have it, but returning it also seemed very odd.
She turned her gaze to the bright and multicolored streetscape outside the car window. It was overly quiet inside the car. After a while, Yu Tu started to talk by saying, "Jing Jing, please help me switch on the navigation system."
Qiao Jing Jing was still looking outside and did not move as she said softly, "You don't even know the way. Why did you snatch the driver's work?"
Yu Tu did not speak again and drove in silence. But Qiao Jing Jing's heart had been stirred up by him and was no longer calm. After a while, she asked, "Why are you here? Don't you need to go home for the New Year?"
"I came over from Jing City early this morning. If it hadn't been Chinese New Year's Eve yesterday, I would have come over yesterday." Yu Tu's voice was also very soft. "Jing Jing, I'm anxious."
Qiao Jing Jing's heart trembled and she couldn't help but look at him. However, from her angle, she could only see his taut lower jaw and that the hand holding the steering wheel seemed to be doing so especially tightly.
After a while, Qiao Jing Jing said. "I will sleep for a while."
"Okay."
Qiao Jing Jing leaned her head against the glass window of the back seat. Actually, she was not sleepy at all, and she did not even pretend to sleep. The so-called "sleep for a while" was merely a polite excuse to remain silent, and they were each well aware of it.
The car moved away from the bright and multicolored city and traveled along the monotonous highway. There was no street lights on the highway, and it was all dark inside the car. Only when their path criss-crossed with a car coming in the opposite direction did a moment of brightness shine in.
And every time this moment of brightness lit things up, Qiao Jing Jing would wake up from her fantasy.
She bowed her head and opened up his driver's license.
In the photo on it, he was handsome and elegant.
He said that he was anxious…
She closed the document with a sound of a snap.
She lost track of the time, but at some time, the car left the highway and entered the winding road to the highway service area. Qiao Jing Jing moved slightly, and Yu Tu immediately noticed this. He explained briefly, "Fueling up."
The driver had not filled the gas tank completely?
She looked at the dashboard in front, not really understanding it. The time on the dashboard showed that they needed another hour to get to Jing City. She hesitated for a while and said uneasily, "I'm going to the toilet."
Yu Tu turned the steering wheel. "Okay."
Yu Tu parked the car in a corner next to the public washroom.
Qiao Jing Jing put on her mask and got off the car. When she came out of the washroom, she saw Yu Tu's standing, his back to her, at the public hand-washing area, as if waiting for her.
She slowed her footsteps a bit. At the same time, Yu Tu turned around and explained lightly, "It's too late. I was worried."
Qiao Jing Jing made a "hmm" sound. They walked to the car together.
It was a late, midwinter night. It was also Chinese New Year's day. Thus there were not many people in the service area. It was empty and quiet all around, and it seemed as if you could hear the breathing of the people around you.
Yu Tu was walking beside her. Her down jacket would occasionally rub against his coat, and for no reason, there arose an ambiguous, evoking atmosphere that caused her mind to wander into certain fancies. Qiao Jing Jing moved to the side slightly, and automatically quickened her pace.
Arriving in front of the car, Qiao Jing Jing walked over to the back seat as before, but when her hand was on the door handle, a man's palm suddenly thrust out and pressed hard on the door.
The piercing breath belonging to a man immediately enveloped her.
Qiao Jing Jing's heart jumped. But then there was no movement. After quite a while, Yu Tu's suppressed, hoarse voice was heard above her head.
"It really means nothing to you anymore?"
Qiao Jing Jing looked fixedly at his hand that pressed on the car door.
"Why did you write to me and answer those questions? Are you feeling regretful? Because I was so foolish before, and that touched you?"
Qiao Jing Jing said in a low voice, "I don't want that, Yu Tu."
A hint of pain flashed through Yu Tu's eyes. "Did I do something very stupid?"
Qiao Jing Jing pursed her lips.
"These recent days, every day I wrote letters late into the night, but I never felt tired. I was proud of what I was doing, full of expectations, thinking that you would be happy when you received them. Jing Jing, the fact that I thought that, does that mean my IQ has dropped to a negative number?"
His voice was pained. "Probably every stupid thing I've done in my life was for you.
"But, I couldn't think of other ways," he said softly. "I didn't regret it because I saw the chat history. I was already regretting it a long time ago, but I dared not admit it."
"Later, I went on a work trip and spent a month in the desert. I thought I was still struggling, but one day I found out that the time I spent struggling was too little. Most of the time, I was thinking, how can I win you back?"
"I even started to blame you."
Blame her?
Qiao Jing Jing finally turned to look at him.
Yu Tu slowly lifted up his hand and took off the mask over her mouth. His eyes were gentle and also pained. "Blame you for coming to ask me so soon. If you had given me some more time, I would have surrendered to myself, and then at that time, I could have come to ask you."
She clearly knew that she should not let herself be led by him, yet Qiao Jing Jing could not help asking, "Ask what?"
"Ask, 'Do you want to be together with me?'."
The air seemed to solidify.
They faced each other. Yu Tu looked attentively at her, then seriously and cautiously asked again: "Jing Jing, are you willing to be together with me?"
Qiao Jing Jing looked at him and was unable to suppress the sting in her eyes.
She had liked the person before her for too, too long already. There had been a time in between when she had let go, but those feelings had so easily returned.
In him were all the qualities that she liked. He defined her understanding of loving someone.
Would she be able to reject him?
She knew in her heart that it would be very, very difficult, but such awareness also made her feel so wronged and sad.
After staying silent for a long while, Qiao Jing Jing lowered her head and said in a downcast voice, "I am a little willing, but when I say this, my heart also doesn't feel happy."
For a split second, Yu Tu felt as if his heart had been crushed. All of a sudden, a sharp stabbing pain penetrated into all the limbs and bones in his body. He can no longer control himself and he pulled her into his embrace.
"I am sorry."
For a moment, whatever IQ and EQ he had all turned into ashes. Before this girl in his arms who felt terribly wronged, he only felt flustered and powerless.
He held her tighter and murmured repeatedly in her ear, "I am sorry."
Qiao Jing Jing did not struggle. She let him hold her tightly in his arms, her cheeks pressed against the collar of his soft overcoat. She felt that she was too weak, but right now she didn't really want to think.
"I don't want to find someone who I like him more than he likes me," she said.
"This is not true." Yu Tu said, "I don't like you less."
"Yes." She accused him, "You said that we are not suitable."
"That's because I was considering some very worldly, tacky reasons, such as income." Yu Tu said with some difficulty, "For instance, what can I give you and do I've time to take good care of you?"
"I also don't have time to take care of you." Qiao Jing Jing said, "If you really like someone, you'll be very impulsive. You won't be hesitant or struggle and won't think so much."
"Then I am probably not the same as you. I think too much. You can't imagine how much."
"What other things did you think about?"
"Probably, I almost thought through everything to the end of my life."
Qiao Jing Jing was quiet in his arms for a while, then stubbornly said: "Anyway, it's still less than me."
The ache in Yu Tu's heart spread.
"Then how about this" He looked down at her. "You tell me a calculation method. How to calculate and how much, and then I will make up the difference. But you can't have it where you don't even tell me your calculation formula."
Qiao Jing Jing blinked her eyes, a little dazed. What the heck was this calculation formula?
Why did this suddenly appear in their conversation?
She was confused for a while. "… You're bullying me again."
Yu Tu:
"….."
He immediately said, "I was wrong."
"I haven't said yes."
Yu Tu sighed. "I know."
After a while.
Qiao Jing Jing said softly: "I'm cold."
"Then let's get into the car, but can you please sit in front?" Yu Tu was practically coaxing her. "Help me switch on the navigation system. I really don't know the rest of the way."