Wendy awoke in the middle of the night, drawing in shaky breaths and trying to sort out the fear and uncertainty that pressed in on her. First, she knew someone had been down in the house. Someone sinister who was not supposed to be there. She had been half awake when she saw the intruder leave, and only now when she was fully conscious did she comprehend that they had been real. Second, she had had the dream again. The pirates on their ship turning into the man and the boys, the sudden cold, the hands reaching for her. Faces and facts and emotions swirled around in her mind until one by one, they fell back into places that had been vacant for days.
She had dreamed of her father and brothers, but now she recognized them. She recalled the cruise, remembered that they had been killed, that they had all gone on that trip because she had insisted. Why had she forgotten about them before? Other facts jumped to the forefront of her mind. Her mother in the hospital, in a coma for days. How many days had it been? She thought of all the boys at the children's home and how Mrs. Nancy had likely panicked when Wendy hadn't come to work. She thought about how they were going to be shut down if the department didn't accept the repeal.
Wendy jumped up from her bed, and then hesitated. As much as she knew she needed to return home, she didn't want to. The thought filled her with immense guilt, but she loved this place. For a few days she had been carefree, she had learned how to have fun again. And Peter? Her breath caught in her throat when she thought of him. Sure, he had kidnapped her, but now he seemed so different from that boy who had dragged her here. He was kind and wonderful and marvelous and still a little bit cocky, but her heart ached when she thought of leaving him. How had she forgotten everything about her past until just now?
She searched through her muddled brain, trying to decipher what had been different. She had spent most of the previous day with the pirates, watching them on deck and then locked in the cabin below for hours until Peter came for her. She had seen mermaids who tried to kill her and she had operated the massive Neverbird. Had she just been so distracted with the splendor of Neverland and the joy of being with Peter that she'd forgotten her family? Her responsibilities?
Her throat was dry and she looked around for something to drink. Maybe she could steal a sip of someone's medicine...
The medicine! She thought. Of course! Hadn't it calmed her and taken away her worries the first time she drank it? And the more she drank, the more she forgot. She felt betrayed. It was all a trick. All a sick, twisted game. One that all of these lost boys had been subjected to as well. And yet, as much as it angered her, she was tempted to drink the medicine down again, to forget, to be blissfully ignorant of the pain of her past, the duties expected of her now, to stay in Neverland forever, to be with Peter...
She gasped and shook her head, willing the thoughts to leave. She had to go home. As beautiful and exciting as it was in Neverland, it was dangerous. Something unpleasant lurked beneath the colors and the magic.
She shuffled around in the dark until she found something to write with, then scrawled a hasty note to Peter and left it on the cabinet by his bed. She peered down at his face, peaceful and enticing even as he slept, and she wondered if she should wake him to say goodbye. But she knew he'd be upset, and would probably try to convince her stay, so she brushed her lips against his cheek, then turned and went out into the dark Neverland night.
*****
"It's a good thing I have an alarm to alert me of trespassers around here, because if you had crept in without warning I swear I would have killed you."
Wendy attempted a smile, but Tink gave her such a severe look that she abandoned the friendly expression. The pale girl was disheveled and angry, but beneath her hostile look there was a hint of glee.
"So, you forgot to take your medicine?" Tink stated.
"How did you know?"
"I can see it in your eyes. You've lost that annoyingly naive expression you had when you were here before. Plus, I've been watching you all this time," Tink admitted. "You were with the pirates during medicine time. Good work with the Neverbird, by the way, although your landing was a little bit rough."
Wendy stared at her.
"What do you expect? I'm in here all day, and Peter has conveniently forgotten about me since you've been here, so of course I'm going to be watching everything you guys do."
Wendy frowned. It was true. She hadn't seen much of Tink's avatar in the past couple days. But then another realization hit her.
"You don't take the medicine, do you?" She asked.
Tink's face fell, and she stared down at her hands. "No," she replied. "I used to, but every time I missed it, it became worse and worse. The memories were one thing, but the uncertainty, the unfamiliarity of everything really, um, affected me."
Wendy glanced around at Tink's small room in central control. The room she never left. "Oh, I'm sorry," she said softly, pity creeping into her voice.
Tink's head snapped up. "Don't look at me like that!" She exclaimed. "Don't pretend like you know me, like you understand all my weaknesses. I don't need your sympathy."
"I wasn't... I didn't mean..." Wendy stammered, but she realized nothing she could say would appease the girl. She decided to just get to the point. "Look Tink, I'm sorry to barge in on you in the middle of the night..."
"You didn't barge. I knew you were coming. Alarm, remember?"
"Okay, but I wanted to ask you..."
"He doesn't care about you, you know."
"What?" Wendy asked, a little bit flustered.
"Peter. He doesn't love you."
Wendy bit her lip, wondering why the girl was bringing this up. Tink smiled evilly and turned to one of her screens.
"Here, watch this," she instructed.
The screen showed what must have been a recording from the day before. The lost boys were all tied together on the deck of the ship and Captain Hook was addressing Peter.
"Oh no? I was under the impression that you were in love with this girl."
The other lost boys looked dubious and made faces, but Peter gazed thoughtfully at Captain Hook. After a few seconds he responded:
"Nah, she doesn't really mean that much to me. I just wanted to see what it'd be like to have a girl in Neverland."
Wendy let out a small cry of indignation and immediately wished she hadn't. Tink turned to her, nearly gloating.
"See? He doesn't care about you at all. You were just an experiment. A game."
Tink's words stung her more than she wanted them to. Had it all been a game? But then, there had been the look on his face, the pause before he answered...
It doesn't matter, she thought. She was leaving, so there was no use analyzing what Peter may or may not have felt for her. In any case, this would make it easier to go.
"Tink," Wendy said urgently, getting the girl to look at her face, "I need your help." Before Tink could unleash the string of expletives that were sure to come out of her mouth, Wendy blurted out, "I need you to help me leave Neverland. Help me find my way back home. Please."
Tink raised her eyebrows and a smug smile appeared on her face.
"I thought you'd never ask."