I don't speak.
I don't say a word even though I know perfectly well who it is. How did he manage to find me? It's completely dark and he could've mistaken me for someone else.
Being trapped in a closed up space with someone you've been hell bent on avoiding has to be one of the awkwardest things ever.
"You scared me." I manage to say.
"You're handling it well."
"I was this close to screaming your ears out."
"Remind me to gag you next time." He moves backwards so that our breaths are no longer mingling. "Could we please address the elephant in the room?"
I play dumb. "What elephant? I don't see any elephant."
"You've been sneaking through the walls of the hotel, hiding from God knows what."
"I just figured things would no longer be the same after finding out your brother's in prison because of me." A sigh leaves my mouth and I rest the back of my head on the wall. "It's okay to be mad at me. I'm also mad at myself."
"That's no longer your problem. What's done is done. It's left for me to fix the rest."
His words surprises me. "And how would you do that?"
"I have no idea."
"That's reassuring."
"We're going to find a way."
I couldn't have heard him right. "We?"
"Yeah. You're going to help me." He says it as a matter of fact.
"When did we have that conversation?"
"In my head. It went well and you weren't asking so many questions."
I ought to have known he wouldn't ask for help like any other normal person would. I've become overly used to the way he approaches stuffs. He does it the Noah way.
Why do I find that hot?
"You're zoning out on me," He snaps his fingers on my face.
"It's just... your brother's case is not the main reason I've been avoiding you." Oh God, I'm doing this. "These few past days have been what you'd call hectic for me, and emotional. I didn't... mean for anything to seem awkward after that video. I didn't know what I was doing. I was drunk... I was hurt. I needed to get it out of my system. But when everyone saw me say those things in that video, I couldn't face you. I felt like I had no right having those kinds of feelings after what I did to you and your brother."
I feel like I'm rambling, and he's not saying anything which makes the situation more nerve wrecking for me.
"So... I meant every drunken word I said... and..."
"Just shut up and kiss me," he says softly.
With my heart drumming in my chest, I grab a handful of his hair and drag his mouth down to mine. His response is satisfying. His lips are hungry, not nearly as patient as his voice had been. The arms that holds me tightens possessively, steals my breath, has me parting my lips to gasp for air.
And my mouth is invaded by his quick and clever tongue.
It's like being swallowed. Like being eaten alive with a greed that incites greed. Hearts pounding. Racing wild. Dangerously fast. And I wonder if we continue to ride this course, at this speed, how soon one or both of us would fly headlong into the air.
None of the kisses I've shared with other guys compares to this burst, this shock of having his skillful lips devour mine. Or the hot, impatient way he uses tongue and teeth to simply overpower, to focus every thought, every feeling, every need into that point where mouth meets mouth.
The edge of something bites into my back. The fingers I'd twined through his hair curls into a hard, taut fist. And the primal male taste of him courses through my body and leaves it in ruins.
"Goddamn it," He drags his mouth away, stares into the darkness. "Goddamn it all to hell."
And his mouth comes down on mine again to feed.
I moan, a sound traps in my throat as he closes a hand over it and squeezes lightly. The feel of his hand, hard and callused and strong on me, has the muscles in my thighs going loose, the tension in my stomach pushing toward pain.
A hand closes over my breast, so firm through the flannel of my shirt. When it's not enough, not nearly enough, he yanks my shirt free of my jeans and streaks under to my flesh. His thumb flicks over a nipple, ricocheting bullets of heat from point to point through my overtaxed system.
I go limp, might have slid through his arms like vapor if he hadn't changed his grip. He cups my breast, fingers stroking, skimming. I swear to God, he could take me right here, right now, and I would let him...
But then he begins to pull away.
Disappointment surges through me. "W-what?Am I doing it wrong?"
"No. We need to stop," he says through labored breathing.
Is he kidding? He sounds like the girl here, which would make me look like the horny guy. How the roles have changed.
"I... I'm not good for you," he continues.
"That's my decision to make."
The power comes back on and I see his face clearly now, lips swollen and red.
My body relaxes a little. "On another note, what do think about a sit-down dinner while watching a magic show performance?"
His look is skeptical. "Are you asking me out on a date?"
"Maybe." He blinks, his eyes now holding a stunned look. "I'm alright to go rolling around with, but not good enough for you to put on a nice shirt and invest fifty bucks in a meal?"
"Where'd you get a damn fool idea like that? I just never figured you'd be interested in sitting down to eat with me."
Maybe feminine power was fiercer than I'd imagined, if wielding just a hint of it causes someone like Noah to flop. "Well, maybe you're wrong."
His phone dings with a message as he moves his gaze away from mine to read it. "I have to go. Renee wants me to stay with Jane for the night."
"Did she mention why?"
"She says something about having a night out. TTYL. With loads of emojis and exclamation marks."
I step out of the room and he follows behind. "You should go," I say easily.
He hadn't responded to the offer I made, and I can't tell if he's doing it on purpose or it just might have slipped his mind.
"Sunday night. Six O'clock. Dinner and a magic show." He doesn't see the blush creeping up my cheeks because he turns immediately and retreats down the hall where the elevators are.
_________________
For the next few days, I have too much to do to think about why Cory's been avoiding me, or having dinner with Noah, or potentially taking him to my bed.
We are only down to two weeks before Summer ends.
So much has happened. Good and bad. Mostly good. Friendships were made, secrets were revealed, hearts were broken, tears and blood were shed, and most importantly, the relationship with my sister is back to normal. At least she made that clear when we talked last night for two hours.
I found out she got a Summer job at a popular ice-cream shop in the state, and will continue to work there till she saves enough money for her class' trip to Europe next year.
Why didn't we think of a trip to Europe instead? I wonder who brought up the stupid idea of coming to Hawaii.
Oh wait, that's me.
I feel the weather continue to warm as I approach Miss Renee's house. Sometimes, she spends her free time in her gardens and in the beds she'd planted in her backyard, which is exactly what I find her doing when I poke in a head to see if she's home.
"Hey." I wander to where she's at in the garden "Looks nice." I comment, scanning.
"Yes, it does." She continues to plant. "The moon's been warm and yellow all week."
I purse my lips. "Do you make that stuff up?"
"I'm setting my cosmos, aren't I?"
"Whatever that means," I murmur under my breath, watching Jane at the other end of the garden play with a puppy. "New pet?"
"That's all Noah's doing. I don't like dogs, so they conspired against me and got one." She studies my face with a smug look on hers. "You seem to be in a good mood. I guess you put those tickets to good use."
I see it now. "You did that on purpose."
"Shouldn't I have?"
"I don't know. I had the idea you wouldn't be fine with us hanging out." Because I got your nephew in prison. But I guess Noah didn't tell her that story yet. And I'd like if he'd keep it that way.
"I expect you and Noah to work this out, and leave me entirely out of the equation. I will only make one observation, as his Aunt. He's used to having it his own way, so if he says it's you, it's you. No one else's opinion counts. Not mine, not even his mom. And I applaud the action."
On a sigh, I crouch down beside her. "Okay, Noah's stupendously amazing, and he's smart, and nine times out of ten, he's right, which is really irritating in the day-to-day course of things."
"You're crazy about him," she murmurs.
"Well, sure. Sexiest geek on the planet, and very available." Jane's happy squeal fills our ears, has me glancing over at her.
"That I know. You never ask about her father."
"It's not my business."
"You should at least know." Miss Renee bends to set down her garden trowel. "I didn't love him. I want to say that right off because some people still like to think poor girl, some guy got her pregnant then didn't stand by her. And they think your heart's been broken by some asshole. It wasn't like that."
"Good. It'd be a shame if Jane's father was an asshole."
Her laugh bubbles up, makes her shake her head. "You're going to make this easier. He was a nice guy, a grad student I met when I was working at a bookstore back in Florida. We'd flirt with each other, and we hit it off, went out a couple of times. Then my father died."
She dusts her hands on her jeans and leads me into the house through the back door. "I was so lost, so sad. I think if anything happened to my mother, it would be like being blinded. I've got my brother to hold on to, Noah's father, but I can't imagine the world without her."
She breaks eggs into a bowl and whisks while I sit on the kitchen counter. "I was a lot younger when my father died, and I guess in some ways, it's easier. But I know there's a stage you have to go through, the one where you can't believe anything's going to be right again, or solid again."
I can relate so well.
"And when you go through it, start to feel again, it hurts. This guy, he was there for me. He was very sweet, very comforting, and that's how one thing led to another."
She tilts her head to meet my eyes. "Still, we were never more than friends. But it wasn't a fling, it was—"
"Healing."
Her lips twitches. "Yes. He went back to school, and I got on. I didn't realize I was pregnant at first. The signs didn't falter through my head. And when I did..."
"You were scared."
"I was pissed. I was mad. I didn't want to be pregnant. I didn't want a baby. I had to work, I had to grieve. I needed an abortion. But somewhere in all that thinking, it got real. I was going to have a baby. If I had a baby, I wouldn't be alone. That was selfish thinking, and the first time I realized I was leaning forward to keeping it. For me."
"And the grad student?"
"I went to see him, to tell him. He'd fallen in love with somebody. Big sunbursts of love," she says, throwing her arms out to illustrate. "He was so happy and excited, and when he talked about her, he just sent off waves of love."
"So you didn't tell him."
"I didn't tell him. What was I supposed to do? Say, gee, that's nice, glad you found someone who makes your world complete. How do you think she'll feel about the fact that you knocked me up? On top of that, I didn't want him. I didn't want to marry him, or anything. So what was the point?"
"He doesn't know about Jane?"
She pauses a moment. "I know he has a right to know. I heard he married that girl in June, and they moved up to Virginia where his people are from. I think, whatever his reasons were, I did the right thing for all of us. Maybe he'd love Jane, or maybe she'd just be a mistake to him. I don't want to know. Because she was a mistake for me for those first few months, and I hate knowing that. I didn't start to love her, really love her until I was about five months gone, and it was like everything in me opened up, and she was filling it. That's when I knew I had to leave Florida. Give us both a new start, clean slate."
"It was brave, and it was right."
Miss Renee takes a deep, steady breath, like she just needed someone to vent out to in order to feel much more better. She replaces the worried look on her face with a smile.
"Eggs and bacon?"
How could I say no to food?