Everything always comes to an end.
It was my Grandma's favorite saying. And her last words. She died with a smile on her face. The thing is, she's not wrong but I never really agreed with her. I mean if everything always came to an end, then there would be no point in trying at all. The only way I could ensure that I didn't lose my sanity was by ignoring the fact that everything, in fact, did come to an end.
Three years of friendship and love shouldn't just end like that. It hurts so much, especially when Mason was so respectful and mature about it. Just before leaving for college, he broke the news to me that he didn't think that we could work in a long distance relationship. I mean yeah, I was what you would say a little clingy. And maybe insecure. But he wasn't even condescending about it. He told me that he would always love me and that we could stay friends if I was okay with it. I, on the other hand, lost it. I started bawling and screaming and worrying about whether we ever had anything real. He then proceeded to comfort me and bought me food before leaving for his flight. Now, I definitely do not deserve a gentleman like him.
But it does not help that I spent around two hours looking through our memories together. Our pictures, our memorabilia, our laughing faces, all of it isn't ours anymore. We worked so well together. I met him on a school trip during my sophomore year. He is what anyone would say, a beautiful man. He always has a smile on his face, even in a situation that would make anyone uncomfortable. It was that wretched smile that made me look at him in the first place. He and his friends decided that it was a great idea to smuggle in alcohol for our three day stay at the forest.
I was responsible for checking whether students did, in fact, bring in alcohol, cigarettes, drugs or anything harmful to the camp. While I checked each bag, I came across his alcohol hidden between a pair of sweats. Now, I am definitely not a spoilsport, but only if I got a share in whatever was happening. I hid the bottles and showed the rest of the knickknacks to the camp supervisor, and she told me to keep the other objects in the principal's cabin. I was aware that the staff would end up using all the confiscated stuff, so I placed all the objects in the principal's cabin, except the four bottles of alcohol.
I knew exactly who those bottles belonged to, through the name tag in his bag and snuck into his cabin. Four boys other than Mason himself, were rooming with him. I then proceeded to blackmail them into letting me take a bottle or two out of their stash in exchange for not snitching on them to the camp. They then challenged me to a drinking game and whoever won would take all of the bottles. Now, that was better than what I had bargained for. Half a bottle later, the dude who challenged me, Dylan, passed out on his bed, while I beamed with my victory in hand.
This incident, then led to a beautiful friendship developing between us, and that friendship in the case of Mason, bloomed into something more. However, fast forward three years later, I was left alone in my bedroom. The night before senior year, sobbing into my pillowcase. Not only did I lose my friend group, but I also lost my boyfriend. And should I mention my first and only one. But thankfully, they weren't my only friends. I did have a few people who I'd say I am close to. I am counting on those kids because I don't know how I could get through a school day without any friends.
After I exhausted my tears, I grabbed a pair of scissors and looked at my reflection in the mirror. Senior year is beginning tomorrow. A new year means a new me. I grabbed my phone, went through a youtube video, and then chopped off my hair. My 3c hair, earlier long and heat damaged, now looked much more healthy, now that I had cut it into layers. I look gorgeous, if I say so myself. I put on my satin cap, plugged in some subliminals, and slept through the night, for the first time in years.
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I like school to be completely honest. It gives me something to do, something to think about. I collect my timetable at the office, and go to my first class. I enter AP Calculus, and look around to see if there are any familiar faces. Sasha, Alina and Jeremy are in this class too. I breathe a sigh of relief, and walk to the back of the class, where they sat. I slide into the seat beside A line, and she smiles and says, " I love the new cut on you. You look even prettier than before. Mason loves it doesn't he?"
I draw my lips into a thin line and I say, "Yeah. Yeah he does. Thank you by the way.",not wanting to publicize our break up. She gives me a concerned look and opens her mouth, as if wanting to say something, when Mrs. Coley walks into the class with a huge smile on her face. "Good morning class! I hope all of you had a wonderful summer break. Now that you have refreshed your mind, I hope all of you focus very well this year. You guys are in your final year of high school, I want all of you to maintain your GPA and cut down on the partying a little bit. Oh look at me rambling on. Before we start the lesson, I want all of you to meet Ren. She has transferred from a prestigious school from Singapore, and I want all of you to be very nice to her. Ren, do you maybe want to introduce yourself?"
A tall girl across the room, stands up and walks to the front of the class. She stands straight, her dark hair falling down till her shoulders. Her eyes, red and puffy, looked like she had been crying. With a beautiful smile, she says, "Hi everyone. My name is Ren and I love painting and movies that make me sob uncontrollably. Hope we have a great year together." Despite her looking like she had just finished having a mental breakdown, her voice did not waver even a little bit. God she's so beautiful. She looks around, giving her best smile, and our eyes meet just for a split second. She stops, smiles wider, and goes back to her seat. Heat rises to my cheeks and I look down, wondering whether my hours of crying have given me a cold or something.
"That was wonderful Ren. Now class, let us revise where we had stopped the previous year..", and so the day went on, uneventful since that first period.
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I did say I loved school. But I had forgotten how tiring it could be. I hear the last bell ring, and I rush to my locker, shoving books into it with a speed that looks almost comical. "Hey Jenny, would you maybe want to get lunch later? There's a new pizza place down the street and it smells heavenly."Sasha asks, her hand looped around Jeremy's shoulder. Jeremy looks at me with a smile, his cheeks slightly tinted pink. "Of course, I would love to come", I say with a smile. Despite a splitting headache, I think a little pizza, and a lot of socializing would maybe improve my mood, even if it seems unlikely at this point.
"That's great then. Let me go get Alina and we will be good to go", she chirps and walks off towards the bathroom. Jeremy stands there, awkwardly, with his hands in his pockets. "So, how's Mason?", he asks. "He's good. He said he likes his new dorm room. Apparently college is way different from high school.", I say. "Well that's good then", he says with a half smile. To be completely honest, Jeremy and I don't really get along. Yeah, we do hang around as a group, but we never have much to say to each other, especially one on one. An awkward silence hung around the air. Before I could open my mouth and say something to diffuse the silence Alina came shouting, "Let's go get some pizza in our tummies, ladies." Jeremy protests that he wasn't a lady but Alina doesn't seem to hear him and grabs my hand, and after a long day, a smile appears on my face. Maybe today won't be as bad as I thought it would be.
We walk down the street, and before we spot the store, I can smell the aroma of freshly baked bread and olive oil wafting down the street. "It smells delicious, oh my god.", Jeremy remarks.
We walk in, the bells ringing as we push open the door, to see a beautiful restaurant. It looked so cozy and homely. Unfortunately, we weren't the only high school kids to have the bright idea of coming down here after a long school day. The restaurant was packed with kids from our school, and we couldn't even find a table to sit at.
"What can we do now?", Sasha asks us. All of us look at each other and shrug. "Okay we did not walk down here for nothing. "We'll wait around for a bit to see whether the tables clear up. If not we'll leave.", Alina says. "Yeah that seems good enough", I say. We stand awkwardly, looking around. Jeremy goes and asks a waiter if there were any tables free. The waiter points towards a girl sitting alone at a large table. Four chairs were available next to her, but no one seemed to want to sit near a stranger. We walk towards her and I ask, "Hey, do you mind if we sit here?" She looks up from her laptop, and to my surprise, it is the girl from the morning.
"Oh hi! Aren't you the girl from calc?", she asks with a smile. "Yeah I am. Nice to meet you, Ren", I say. "Oh you remembered my name. That's sweet of you. All of you can sit here. I was gonna leave anyway.", she says, grabbing her laptop and keys. "Oh no no, if you want you can sit here for longer we totally don't mind,", I say, looking around at my friends. Jeremy and Sasha nod vigorously while Alina looks at me amusedly. I look at her questioningly, and before I could ask her why she looked so amused, Ren says, "No seriously, I was just leaving. My uncle will be here any moment" Saying so, she walks out the door. "Well that went pretty good.", Jeremy says, and slides into one of the seats. We all settle, only for me to notice then that Ren left her notebook at the table. "Order for me guys. I want pepperoni. I'll give her the book and be right back." I get up and walk out the door. As soon as I leave, Alina whispers, "Is it just me or can anyone else feel the weird tension between those two?", she jerks her head towards the door.
Meanwhile, I look around to see no one on those streets. I sigh and walk back into the restaurant. I'll give it to her at school, I decide. I walk back to our table and only to find Sasha ordering a large pepperoni pizza, and a medium Hawaiian pizza. "You guys enjoy pineapple on pizza?", I say with a disgusted look on my face. The waitress smiles at me and says, "I've heard this question one too many times. Trust me, it tastes better than it sounds." I don't say anything and slide into my seat.
Around thirty minutes later, our pizzas arrive, golden brown and smelling like how I assume heaven would. "Finally. I thought I would die out of starvation", Jeremy says. Ravished, we all dig into the pizza. Sasha then begs all of us to try at least one slice of the pineapple pizza. We all stand our ground and say no, but eventually she turns on her puppy-dog-eyes and looking at her, Jeremy sighs and says, "Okay guys. One slice."
I and Alina look at each other, with a disgusted look on our faces. We each grab a slice and Alina says, "We take a bite together. One, Two and Three." We bite into the pizza, and surprisingly enough, it doesn't taste as bad I thought it would. "Well well, the waitress wasn't wrong after all.", Jeremy says, biting into more of his slice. "I told you so but you guys wouldn't listen at all.", Sasha says.
We finish off at the restaurant quick enough and Alina offers me a ride home, to which I accept readily. As she drives she turns to me and says," Hey, what's up with you and the new girl?" "New girl? Oh you mean Ren? Yeah she's cool, what about her?", I say. "Oh really, okay then nevermind."
Well that was weird. "How's Mason by the way?", she asks. "Yeah he's good. We decided that long distance was not our cup of tea and so we broke up.", I say. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry. I'm always here if you need anyone.", she says, her eyes concerned. "Thank you so much.", I say, not wanting to tell her about my crying session. She soon plugs in her playlist and we begin singing along to the music, a smile on both of our faces.
She soon drops me off at my porch and we say our goodbyes. I walk into my house, only to see my younger brother drinking milk straight from the bottle, his feet up the table, watching reruns. "Dude, get a glass for fucks sake. That's nasty.", I yell. I rush up the stairs and head to my room, when I hear sounds of yelling from my parents' bedroom. Not again. I ignore them, and decide that maybe it is time that I go to sleep. My headache has not reduced since then and I don't think I have the physical or mental energy to stay up anymore. I grab a Panadol, and go to sleep in an instant.
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I wake up and look around for the time. Shit, I've been asleep for three and a half hours. I wash my face quickly and rush downstairs. My mom cooks dinner, my brother and father nowhere to be seen. "Where are they, Ma?", I ask.
"Your brother left to finish his project in some girl's house. Your dad stormed out after he fought with me.",she says. Maybe this wasn't a great time to come down. I grab some chocolate from the fridge and check my messages. Nothing. I really should check up on the guys. No, I'll wait for a day or two. I want to text them real bad though. I hate to admit it, but I kinda do miss them. Maybe they're busy with college stuff. Settling into dorms can be kinda tough.
Speaking of which, I turn to my mother and ask, "Ma, where do you think I should apply for college?". "Anywhere your heart desires, Jen. Your father and I think that you can get into an Ivy league with some effort from your side. Maybe law? Or medicine?", she says,looking at me. I snort at the expectations my parents have in my career. "Oh. But I was thinking about art school? The local community college has a pretty great graphic design course. So I thought about-", before I could finish my sentence, my mother cuts me off with," No, Jenny. You're an intelligent young woman. Put in a little effort and you can become successful. Look at your aunt, Tuli. She studied Harvard Law and is now earning so much. You can become like her if you put your mind to it".
I sigh, and conclude that this wasn't really the best of times to mention my aspirations of becoming a graphic designer. "Okay thank you, Ma. I'll go finish up on my homework.", I mumble and go back to my room. I don't think that I love the fact that senior year is gonna be full of changes.