- DEVOURAH -
A feeling that I didn't think would build up. It was funny to think about how I was convincing myself that it was just for the sake of the story and nothing more. And that, I shouldn't interlude with the characters' lives anymore after this.
But then, is this what they called the "Game of Fate?" Although I was playing, it wasn't my intention to fall in love with her. "Is this really happening?" Is what I'm asking all the time. It's been a month since I started to annoy her. I would wake up early just to see her, which is something I didn't get to do when I was still in my world.
Who would've guessed that my feelings would grow in such a short period of time? Is this how it feels to be a character in a book? I'm not complaining, but how did I even fall for Serina in the first place? I was simply teasing her to grab her attention, but it appears that I've struck gold. A jackpot indeed.
This might be the one of those: 'Mission failed successfully' moments.
But, if you ask me, what she said at the time convinced me that I had fallen for her. Every statement and syllable she utters stabs me in the chest, as if I'm being murdered. Cliché and typical feelings, isn't it? I never thought that I'd be in this position one day. It got to the point where my mind completely blanked out, and all I wanted to do was rest and to retreat.
That night, I was debating whether or not I should continue. She expresses herself clearly. "And I'm not dumb. I know you're not in-love with me. So please, can you leave me alone? WHAT I LIKE IS HER HIGHNESS AND NOT YOU! CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?!" These words made me realize how much I wanted her to look at me without knowing that I had already fallen in love with her.
Her apperance is just an extra. I don't know why I fell in love with her when she's disgusted by my presence. I don't know why I fell in love with her when she doesn't even like me. I may not know why I fell in love with her, but I'm sti going to take the risk.
"There will be no more plot changes. After all, I'm going to live with this for the rest of my life. No more hesitations, Devie." That's what I said to myself on that night. But then her words would flash across my thoughts, and I would remain speechless.
"6 days.." I will give her 4-6 days of space. That's enough to make her head cool, isn't it? If she rejects me this time, I'm not sure I'll be able to move forward when I already feel messed up.
3 days have passed and my work has started to pile up. I was rushing to finish the paperwork and rush my responsibility just to see her. If only I could ditch this all for her. However, I stayed in the palace far too long. I was afraid that if she saw my face, she would begin to ignore me, and everything would become awkward. So I told myself to finish all my responsibilities first, then go and visit her afterwards.
Until a letter arrived one day. She was apologizing and that made my day. I felt like I could finish hundreds of pages of paperwork in just hours now that she has already communicated with me. I started to write back, but all I ever received was a worried letter from her. She inquired as to my whereabouts and whether I had given up.
I wrote another letter, but the responses I'm getting are becoming worst. "Helvetica might be blocking my response." is what I was thinking at that time. I've had enough of her worrying about where I am, when I completely informed her that I'm working. So I decided to grind. I was afraid that if I took too long, she might resent me for not coming.
I haven't slept for weeks and yet here I am, recharging by hugging this woman whom I never expected to fall in love with. She's part of Helvetica's love interest. But here I am, stealing her away from Her Highness.
"I missed you." The only words that I can summarize for what I feel. I loved her. And I just don't want to love her because of my plan.
This time, it'll be different. "You're a jerk." I chuckle slightly. "I am."
"I hate you." I caressed her hair. "I know," We might not be given a chance to be the protagonist of this story, but she's the heroine in my pages. The maiden in our own novel. I wanted my story to be filled with our chapters. A story which will not just end in a prologue. But I hope we'll make it until the epilogue.
"I missed you," Her hug tightened as she said those words, crying. Whoever looks at us will definitely disapprove. After all, I can't be in a relationship with someone who doesn't have a title.
"You're starting to be honest with your feelings." She then stared at me for a while, trying to examine my face as if I had some dirt on it. "Are you done checking me out?" Serina began to compose herself as she took a firm stand.
"Please accept my apologies." Serina bowed, and I remained silent. It was the first genuine apology I'd ever heard from her. I was puzzled as to why she apologized. Are we going to stop? Is she going to push me off? But then my mouth suddenly spoke. "If there's anyone who's going to apologize, isn't it supposed to be me?" She looks at me with a puzzled expression.
"I bother you all the time, not knowing that I've already annoyed you. I'm sorry. I have no excuses. But what I feel for you isn't just a game, Serina. I will respect your decision if you're tired of me." A moment of silence filled the entire room.
"But I will not stop. Courting isn't all about having chances with another person. I'm courting you because even though I don't have a chance, I'll take the risk."
"It'll be on me. I may get hurt as a result of this, but I have chosen this path. So if you're getting tired of me, I'll respect your wishes, but I will not stop."
"I told myself not to fall in love with you." Serina smiles bitterly. I know that I'm forcing her too much and that I'm being dumb when I could just spend my money to be happy. But at the end of the day, I will still think of her and everything I bought will be useless...
"Devourah was only trying to deceive you, so don't be fooled by her words. But here you are, bothering me everyday and my system started to get used to it."
"I thought I loved her highness. But the truth is that I'm afraid that if I choose you, you'll end up hurting me."
"Used me like everybody else." She locks her gaze on me while I can see her tears falling for the second time. "I said I wouldn't fall in love with you, but I hate the thought of you leaving me when I'm used to your presence already."
"Can you please not leave?"
"Can you just stay?"
"I don't mind if you disturb me every day, as long as you stay. I don't mind if you come every day; all I ask is that you stay."
"Never beg for someone to stay." I take a step forward as I wipe her tears. "People come and go. Those who go will be a lesson and those who stay by themselves are true. So instead of begging me to stay, Can I ask if I can stay?" She smiles widely. What is this kind of witchery?
"Absolutely, Lady Le Fleur." I stopped her as I chuckled. "And it'll be your surname soon. Serina Le Fleur. My soon to be bride."