KIERA.
Solace.
Throughout my childhood, I sought and found it in my bedroom, with the lights out, just me on a date with my personal darkness.
Now I fled to the bathroom, flushed, my emotions were impassioned. I reacted to every bare brush of cool air against my skin, rehashing the moment when Dylan touched me.
I saw him in my own reflection, he capsized my world with his smile that told me so much, so much that only I could hear. It was like a Morse code. I splashed cold water on my face and returned to the dining area.
A sinking feeling started from my stomach down to my cold feet, upon noticing that Iris and Ra had left. Dylan's eyes narrowed into icy slits when he set them on me.
"Let's go home," he said simply.
Excuse me, what?
We were having a lot of fun, his celebrity friends did not look down their noses at me, and the food was amazing. What was amiss?
"Are you mad at me? I didn't mean to take that long in the bathroom, I swear." I leaned forward in my seat.
He sighed, cleared the cheque, strode outside, his broad shoulders heaved. I knew it was weird, but a strange desire came over me to rip off that shirt and set his muscles free. So that he could breathe. Why was he uneasily fraught?
I followed him like a lost puppy, tail between my legs to wherever he was going.
"Dylan, I'm..."
"Shut up and get in the car. Now." A hush fell over us as I stared at him, unbelieving. Between the white Range Rover and his ticking jaw, I had no clue of which one frightened me more.
So get in the car I did.
He kept his watch on the winding roads ahead, unbearably silent.
I pulled out my phone. It might be a good idea to fall back on texting.
"I don't know what's wrong, but I wish I could ease your pain," I wrote. On a second thought, I added, "Still mad at me?"
Waiting with bated breath for the message to be delivered was sheer agony. When his phone dinged, I studied his bewitching face intently reading my message.
Then he dropped it, along with my soaring hopes that crumbled beyond rescue. There was no other explanation. Dylan was avoiding me. I shunned the tears daring me to let them flow. So he was just like all the other men before him.
Hearts made of steel; feelings as dead as wood. Dylan could go to hell, for all I cared. If I cared.
I kept to my side of the bargain, trusting my willpower to not stare at him. But my body was excruciatingly aware of his domineering presence. I counted each breath he took as if it were my own, but when I recalled what just happened, I hissed quietly, hoping the dumb ride would come to an end.
If I made it safely into that stupid mansion, I would stay the heck away from that crappy piece of divine goodness.
I felt his eyes on me, fervent now. And his hand enclosed mine, hesitantly, I sensed he did not know where we stood. Good.
Neither did I.
Howbeit when he caressed the inside of my palm with his warm thumb, tingles worked their ways deep into my system. I peeked at him sideways. He actually dazed me with a lazy smile. It was infectious, in no time, I was grinning like a complete idiot with no clue of what was funny. God, why couldn't he leave me alone?
Then my phone lighted up with a new text.
"You're too good for me," he said.
What did that mean? I bade my time as he continued typing.
"I feel like crap for snapping at you like that." Oh. That was... I had no words.
"At least give me a heads-up next time you're about to yell at me, so I can get some popcorn," I texted back.
He smiled, pulled over to a nearby curb but said nothing still. Jittery, I hoped and hoped we could keep up this texting thing.
"I'm sorry, l," it was him. Again. I'm sorry, l? Did that L stand for Love? I disagreed, my fingers hovering over the keyboard. What should I say next?
Thank goodness he beat me to it.
"I want to make it up to you. If you'll let me."
"I'm always up for another treat, l. Next time you're not sure if you should call me love, just erase the entire four letters. You give yourself away."
"Second date?"
He completely ignored my tease. My face morphed into one glazed by hurt, but when I looked at him, it was my undoing. He asked the question with his body and soul, I felt his anticipation surge forward. I nodded and said aloud, "I'd really like that."
***
Day bled into night. A certain maid had draped the burgundy faux silk curtains, blocking out moonshine up above. But I couldn't sleep. I tossed ten thousand times and over, from side to side, pondering on the events that had unfolded today. Somewhere in the middle of dozing off and shaking awake, I heard a soft ping of my phone laid back under the pillows.
"Hey girlfriend. How's it going with Dylan? Iris here. He gave me your number while you slept in the bathroom."
Was this a prank? But of course, he would know my number offhand. That douchebag. No wonder he...
"I know you're awake, so just reply already." I imagined her getting ready for bed, perhaps with Ra in the equation.
Quickly, I answered that I was all good but unable to fall asleep, and she recommended one of her songs as an antidote to my current hell.
"See you soon," she responded pronto. "Ra says hi."
I fought the bursting urges to scream for joy. First Ra. Now Iris? They were the hottest celebrity couple from East to West of Hollywood. And they were both interested in befriending an awkward lonely nobody?
That was better than watching the golden sun recede to indigo cool and serene blue, on the hills faraway in countryside, where sunset and happiness meant the same thing.
Iris's famous country special__ Let Me Fall __ waltzed through my air pods as I crept out of the comfort of my bedroom. A habit I formed in the past few days. I would wander around the house like a thief at night, noting which door was never locked and the one that always had it's lights on at eleven.
My instincts jumped to life, sniffed every corner, behind every oil painting adding a taste of beautiful home to the passages. I knew that the watchman drank a full bottle of rum and coke before proceeding to snore his hours of work away.
At times, I was brazened enough to sneak a strawberry banana shortcake from the kitchen. I hadn't found anything astray. Yet. But my guts assured me.
Something would drop, a servant would slip confidential messages, time would twitch. And I would be the first to know.