Chereads / SHAPED BY PAIN / Chapter 6 - Chapter 5

Chapter 6 - Chapter 5

All the teachers were proud of Lunalo for wining that competition.

when she gets home her neighbors were also proud of her she received an award this young lady is good in numbers too on weekends she sells shoes door to door for her stepmom.

when she gets home she was excited to prepare for the next day she knows everyone will be praising her for taking her school to a higher level.

She arrives at school the next day everyone welcomed her with joy,everyone was clapping hands for her,she went straight to her friends Asisipho and Aneziwe to tell her about the competition..hey my friends I have a lot if things to tell you let us sit down and catch up...she said.

ok..ok they both replied and sat down next to their class its break time.

Firstly let me share with you all the details about the competition, I was very nervous because it was my first time but I managed to do my best and won.

congratulations Friend they both replied with smile.

Secondly I have something to tell you guy's said Lunalo.

ok what is it it sounds serious we knew you were hiding something from us what is it? we are your friends Asisipho and Aneziwe asked their friend curiously.

Ok ..Lunalo looked at both her friends and said

I found out something that really freaks me out last week but I didn't want to deal or talk about it when I was preparing for this competition.

what is it? Aneziwe held her friend's hand you know you that we are friends with no secrets right ?

I know ok so last week I left school early because I was sick you guys remember that right?

Yes they replied

I went straight home and went behind the house to put my project in a safe spot and the window was opened, I mom and aunt Sadi were talking inside.

but my name popped I went closer to the window mom said I am not that she is not my biological mother,I was shocked and lost.

''Oh my God",sighed her friends.

so have you ever suspected anything at all?asked Aneziwe.

Lunalo replied, no my friend i just found out my life was a lie all this time.

And the painful part is that I couldn't ask her because If I did mom was going to know that I eavesdropped into their conversation which is wrong so I acted as if I heard nothing,even though this whole thing is killing me inside,my is just in an empty space,all my life I have been with the people who hide such things from me.

Sorry my friend we wish we can just take your pain away,her friends are so worried.

Lunalo has finally released her pain to her friends all the questions that she has even her friends don't have answers to,how will I look to my dad's face when he comes home this weekend?where is my mother and where do I even begin to look for her?

Asisipho hugged her friend and said we will do everything in our power to find your mother no matter what we are with you.

I know my friends its just that I wish I found out about this whole thing when I am wiser and older because now now I am young and I have no direction I keep asking myself is God still with.

Yes yes my friend I know that you are so broken but I am going to speak to my mother and see if she can be able to help you without telling your mom ,Asisipho came with a plan

ok now let us go home and think together we can overcome this problem too we just need to rest.

They all went to their home's.

Lunalo's friends are very shocked to hear this.

when she get's home she did all chores as usual.

I don't want mom to suspect that I know this so I have to act normal.

God will set me free from this pain one day.

I know..I know my God

He is watching over me.

He loves me.

when she is done with her cooking.

she served everyone with food.

She quickly went to her room.

Took out a phone from her chest of drawers she called her cousin Pam.

First thing she asked when she picked up was why did you not tell me that mom was not really my biological mother.

Her cousin reiterated one sentence she said "sorry ",cousin

"sorry",cousin

so so sorry, I wanted to tell you I really wanted to tell you long time,this one day you left in the morning for your 6AM class and we were all called in a family meeting to be told that we have to make sure that we don't tell you that the mother you thought was you mom is actually not your biological because it will break you.

uncle said if we ever tell you that you will be broken and he will blame us as a family if you ever find out.

Lunalo was so shocked to hear all this but her cousin offered to help her search for her mother if she would like to.

If you really want to help me you need to be able to lie in the next coming weekends.

Lie about what? Her cousin asked.

I want to search for my real mother but my dad doesn't have to know he must think that I still know nothing and you have to help me I am not allowed to go out on weekends.

So once we managed to trace my mother's adress you will go tell her that I need to talk to her and give her my school address will you be able to do that for me?

Yes..yes I will do anything to help this whole secret thing was to much for me too I do not like keeping secrets on you. Pam agreed to help her cousin.

Lunalo took out her to write a letter she Hope's to give her mother when they meet.

Dear Mom

growing up I always knew that there was something missing in my life.

I was so broken everyday not knowing what was breaking me

My heart has always been in an empty space, now that I know that it is you that I have been missing I will search for you everyday,I will search for you savior of my soul and when I am found by you I will never let you go.

I promise to be a very good daughter to you and the rest of your family

I hope you are safe.

From my heart to your's

Mommy.

She closed her diary and went to bed thinking of all the things she will do when she finaly meets her mother and her mother's name is Nomusa.

I will make a very nice tea for her before I go to school I will be a good daughter and do everything she asks me to do I promise God please just give me a chance to meet her.

she kept fantasising about her mother until she fell asleep.

She woke up in the cnext day and prepared for her sister to go to school.

At least its friday my dad is coming home I don't know how am I going to dig him for answers but I have to.

Maybe my cousin should come over.

Maybe my friends too.

Eish I have never disrespected my dad before but i am nervous about this i feel like at some point i am going to do anything for myself,she is thinking about her next moves.

She walks Marisa to school when they arrived Marisa turned to her sister and said,big sis I have something for you I my bag.

What is it? she asked with a smile.

A card that I wrote for you she gave it to her.

ok she read it,

Sis thank you for always taking care of me dropping me and fetching me after school I truly appreciate that.

Lunalo looked at her younger sister and hugged her look at you growing up to be like your sister thank you now go to your class I will come and fetch you later and oh I love you.

love you too she replied and ran to her class.

After dropping her she quickly rushed to school too.

After an English class she went to her friends to ask for an advice about her plan to try and get and information from her dad about her mother.

Asisipho suggested that she asks directly and be honest, your dad was not honest with you from the beginning therefore you cannot repeat the same mistake my friend I truly believe being direct with him is the right thing.

Ok hear you Asisipho what do you say Aneziwe?

she looked at her.

From my point of view I don't think your dad will give you a straight answer if you are being direct with him,

He failed to do that for the past 8 year's you were separated with your mother at the age of 4 why didn't he tell you all these year's?

My friend if you want the truth here you must put yourself first and if it means crossing the line I suggest you do exactly that I think that is the only way if you want to see your mother again.

I hear both of you and thank you.

The bell rang.

Oh it's time to go home now we are not having a science class,said Asisipho.

They all went to fetch Marisa together.

When they arrived at school Marisa's teacher miss Laura told them that her father has already fetched her.

Ok thank you miss Laura,they left the pre-school.

It's time for her friends to go home they are not going to pass by the library today it is Friday they will go again in suturday that is when they will finalise their plan of helping Lunalo reconnect with her mother.

Lunalo arrived at home after walking a distance of 5 kilometers.

When she arrives her dad was already at home with the rest of the family.

Hello mom and dad,she greeted

After finding out the truth she adress her real mother mommy and the other mother mom when talkingto her friends.

Hey baby how are you?

Her father asked

I am good dad how was your traveling?

It was wonderful my baby,her dad Marvin replied, open my bags and take out your younger sister's shoes I didn't buy anything for you because you do not attend pre-school and you are not a child anymore.

You now wear a school uniform unlike Marisa they don't wear a uniform they wear whatever.

But dad I also need clothes too I do go to church, to the mall why do you always buy things for Marisa only?asked Lunalo

Your mom suggested that i buy only for Marisa we will buy you two pair of shoes if you work hard.

Lunalo was very broken by this especially now that she overhead a conversation between her mom and a friend she feels as if she is being left out and abused by her stepmother and she feels as if her father is falling for every idea that this evil women suggests, she thinks about all the bad names whenever she thinks about her.

I have an idea Lunalo, said her mom..

what is it mom? she asked

her dad is in the house too.

I think you should sell clothes everyday after school door to door and maybe don't go to school on fridays.

Lunalo was shocked by this her father is quite but he knows how important school is, a mother who suggests that a child must not go to school on fridays and sell clothes for to door ,This woman is ruining my future now Lunalo thought to herself.

This was getting out of hand every thing that this woman says goes, her father believes that she loves Lunalo because she agreed to hide a secret that she is not Lunalo's biological mother all these year's.

I will go and show you how to sell these clothes tomorrow now go to sleep.

Lunalo's stepmom who still doesn't know that Lunalo knows everything but she is playing along do that she will find a way to find her real mother.

The next day was suturday

Lunalo went to her room to sleep early because the next day she will be starting to sell clothes for to door from friday to Sunday according to her mom.

she changed clothes and wore her pajamas and turned up the volume and started to cry.

On my God

I an so confused!

Everyday this woman us crushing me.

Now she want me to not go to school and sell clothes I an going to miss everything other learners get in school .

I am starting to doubt if I will ever become a doctor and a model.

Maybe I was never meant to be any of those why did you allow me to dream if you knew I am not worthy?

Oh Lord!

She screamed...

I an so hurt right now but I cannot say no.

I was thought that it is a disrespect to say no to an older person.

Especially because my father is always taking this evil women's side out leaves me with not choice but to do it.

Maybe I will be suspended in school or they will let me go and I will get to do this forever and it is not safe for a girl child to go alone selling clothes door to door, so Jesus you are my only friend I come to you because I trust I own sleeping now please help me be able to deal with tomorrow's day.

The next day arrived.

Her Stepmom whose real name is Connie knocked at the door.

knock knock..

Lunalo it's a beautiful suturday wake up it's time I go and show you how you will make your new business.

I am coming mom ,she replied.

Come here before you go take a bath I have something to tell you baby.

She quickly woke up and went to her mother's room.

Yes mom I am here.

Listen I am not being unfair to you when I say you must sell clothes I am just looking after you one day you will look back and be grateful to all that I have done for you .

One day me and your father we will die and how are you going to look after Marisa if you know nothing

It is because I want to be a doctor mom that is why I want you to give me an opportunity to study that way I will be able to look after Marisa if something happens between you and dad.

No! you are not that smart you cannot become a doctor..

Maybe Marisa will not you.

But mom I am good in all my subjects I always pass with flying colors ,Lunalo argued so that her mother will have mercy on her and not force her to sell clothes from fridays because it is a school day.

But her mother is not willing to let a child go to school on Friday instead she keeps making her feel even more small.

Hey! you stupid kid mr Khumalo your class teacher was giving you Mark's because he knows your dad.

You are dumb...

You are dumb...

I am helping you here you are not going to school on fridays many people are getting paid on fridays so you will sell clothes.

Monday to Thursday it's ok you can go to school and add your dumbness to the class but if I was you I was going to drop out and focus on this venture that I am giving you because you will never be anything near being a doctor I am sorry my child.

Lunalo was very crushed by this.

I wonder will I ever be happy in my life?

Why am I feeling so much pain?

Its crazy how seasons are constantly changing but mine remains the same everyday.

Lunalo's is getting very depressed.

But she decided to follow her mother's orders.

Her mother gave Lunalo R2000 for her stock and told her to buy at least ten pairs of shoes five for women and five for men and sell them then from the profit you will order more clothes like Jean's,jackets and more

Lunalo did exactly as she was told and she started her business of selling clothes

She started by selling at a house near her home before she could attempt to go far.

Knock knock..

Its Lunalo neighbor please open the door .

The door was opened.

And a lady replied what are you selling let me see.

Lunalo puts down her bag that was very heavy.

I am selling clothes but at the moment I am selling shoes only when time goes I will sell all kinds of clothes for now I am selling brands shoes.

Ok please give me size 6 of the white tekkies .

Then Lunalo has her first customer.

She passed to the bet door

Knock knock.

I am selling clothes.

A man opened the door and said come inside.

She entered the door.

Good day sir I am selling the shoes here they are really beautiful would you like to see them.

Yes,he replied but he is very drunk