Yanarym had been watching the original's twin for days. Worshipping the beauty of the comatose young woman would never tire her, even though she's thin to the bones. They were identical twins after all. She was glad she was given the same beauty as hers.
She was also pretty in her past life but she was way more beautiful now. Indeed, the outer appearance was just a shallow shell and the most important thing was the inner beauty of the person. Nevertheless, no one can still deny the overwhelming satisfaction from looking at a person's physical beauty.
She leapt to some other world or dimension after she had died. She became part of a book and began living in a world she never knew existed. But compared to the past world she had been in, they were still the same. People would say outer beauty doesn't matter but, real talk, it does. They could deny it, yes, but not ignore the fact that it is.
"Guide-sama, do you know that I don't believe in love?" Yanarym peered at Yarisa's direction then to the ticking wall clock.
She remembered she had a pretty friend from her past life back in high school. That friend always had suitors swarming around her, desperately begging for her love and attention. But she became stressed out on her entrance exam for college and her family had suffered financially. Eventually she began to gain weight and her beauty faded along with the men who were once crazy for her.
When college came, her friend regained her peerless beauty and magnificent body. That's when boys began to flirt with her again. Unfortunately, she didn't learn her lesson, you can't trust a man who only likes your appearance- and later got pregnant by one of her seniors in college. The guy took the responsibility and she was forced to drop out of college. But soon after they started living together, it all turned to worst and her friend resorted to suicide along with the unborn child.
Guide-sama: "I know, but why?"
"I learned that if you want to get someone's attention, your most valuable weapon is your appearance. But in order to win their heart, you should know how emotion works and how to manipulate them."
Guide-sama: "I don't understand. I thought you don't believe in love?"
"For me, love equates to total surrender. For some, love is just an emotional satisfaction—one of the most necessary things they could acquire in love."
Guide-sama: "I still don't understand."
"Meaning to say, you won't lose your bet in me when it comes to this game of love because I don't believe in it and would never fall for it. I can control my emotions and other's to my benefit. It's really convenient that I became an actress. In that way, I can sharpen my performance skills." She laughed.
Guide-sama: "I still don't understand."
"Did you know that cold is just a term to say there is no heat?" She smiled.
Guide-sama: "Yes. According to general knowledge, the term cold is a misnomer. The absence of heat is what you are feeling when you are cold. The energy of atoms colliding is temperature and owing to the lack of atoms, a cubic meter of deep space will immediately freeze you."
"That's right. It's just an expression of what we feel, such as love. It doesn't exist. It's just a perfect adjective for our state of emotion."
Guide-sama: "But love is more than an adjective."
"Ahem! What all I wanted to convey is that his love for me doesn't exist but the feelings are real."
Guide-sama: "You mean the six desires of humans? The desire to see, to hear, to smell, to taste, to touch and to love."
"No, not that. I'm talking about emotions. It's seven, right? There is joy, anger, worry, sentiment, sadness, fear and surprise." She explained while counting with her fingers.
Guide-sama: "I see- the seven emotions of humans… But what are you trying to say?"
"Humans naturally feel indebted to someone they did wrong. Conscience is one of the best tools to use in manipulating hearts. If you know the foundation of someone's conscience, you can easily predict their feelings for you."
Guide-sama: "You mean to say, acting as a pitiful and loving sister, and showing empathy yet still waiting for him are all part of your scheme of making him fall in love with you?"
"Bingo!" Yanarym exclaimed and applauded three times. "There are so many variables you can hack to make a person fall in love with you, you know. Some of the basic recipes are scarcity, admiration and affection."
"In my case, he's already attached to me. Now if we add some guilt to it… then, BOOM! He won't be able to distinguish between love and infatuation." Yanarym laughed wickedly after explaining things to her invisible companion.
Guide-sama: "It is complicated. Humans are complicated."
"You don't need to understand, just watch me. I will make sure that when he falls, he will fall hard—no retribution nor salvation."
Guide-sama: "I don't know why but you sound scary, Yanarym."
Once again, she broke into laughter. Hearing Guide-sama saying things like that with its monotonous voice was amusing. She looked at the wall clock and yawned.Three more hours and she could finally leave the place. She needed to work! Money!
Kane's dedication as a doctor couldn't be easily replaced by a relationship he had with some person. It's a struggle between affection for purpose and belonging. She knew it, but she couldn't understand. This was because she was one of those dreamless people. She couldn't comprehend the whole concept of belongingness. It was too strange for her since she was used to being alone.
Uselessly living her life like some extra in a movie gave her satisfaction. Reading stories and watching stuff comfort her more than anything else in the world. But now, she's part of the book and had the chance to change destiny herself. It did sound ridiculous to her.