(Ophelia)
***
With the quick change in tone, Koharu and I followed King Dakota and Princess Roslynn to a foyer, which was of a natural brown tone like a cavern. Fake stalactites and stalagmites sold the aesthetic, and somewhere in the distance was the artificial sound of water dripping. The props deserved a point for trying to imitate that serene hideout of nature.
Adding heat to the chilled floor, Koharu and I stood in the middle of another circular rug just beneath a hanging analog clock. Roslynn and Dakota snuck away to find something, while Aries was somewhere entirely different.
The silence created a small vacuum for me to ask, "Did you make up your mind then?"
While wiping her eyes, Koharu looked to the side of me, missing her characteristic glimmer under the matte finish of indifference.
"Can anyone say they've ever made their mind up? It's just moving from one place of indecision to a lesser one for a moment."
*Please don't pull a philosophy lesson on me. I already failed enough subjects in school.*
"But did you make a choice?"
"Mm."
"Koharu." I shook her arm, sighing heavily. "I can't force you to do anything—"
"You reach for the stars, and you get a burnt hand. You can't hold them for more than a few seconds."
"What the hell is that supposed to—"
"I'll go with you."
Raising my eyebrows at her, I wondered: What was this sudden change about?
*She's still too inconsistent…*
"You're serious?" I bit my cheek. "You've been adamant this whole time."
She chuckled darkly. "I'm selfish to leave my family behind if I stay. I have my rightful place in history, too."
Blinking and looking to the sky, she added, "I wish history could have given me somewhere better to stay. Maybe I could frolic with the dinosaurs or watch the invention of something fantastic."
This time, she laughed lightheartedly. "Heck, I'd even take the here and now over where we live. But I won't." Her tone dropped into a solemn one. "I'll take whatever I have to in order to find my own liberation. I won't trade you for some intangible thing I can't reach."
*Everything you say makes sense, but I can't help but feel you took the words from my mouth.*
Feeling the tides of conflict swell within me, I kept silent. I never asked her to give up what she wanted for me. She never had to look so defeated with that sorrowful look and say she would forfeit her ideals.
Who was I to promise she'd get what she wanted when she got back to our time?
"Don't say it's for me," I finally cautioned her.
"Then,"—she shrugged with little emotion—"it's for my parents and brother. I've already decided—"
As Aries flew into the room behind Koharu with a small machine in her ear that provided an impetus to her restrained dance moves, I spoke up. There was no more time to make a decision, so I rushed mine.
*I just hope I won't regret it.*
"Call it off! Call it all off!"
I flailed my arms before planting them on my head, grasping my hair until a few strands were uprooted.
The fairy's face crumpled into something akin to exaggerated betrayal.
King Dakota yelled from the other side of the room as he approached us, "What? This is your punishment. You don't get to decide whether or not we go through with this. You should be grateful I spare any time at all on your decrepit existences. Get over it."
Roslynn didn't speak as Aries examined an assortment of colorful rocks.
"He's right," the fairy said while a red stone rolled in her palm. "You don't belong here. You're going to have a terrible life if you stay."
"I'll be guilty forever if I do. I never listened to Koharu, and I want to change that," I replied, shouting at the floor with heavy exhales.
My choice ate away at me already. There wasn't a right answer.
*There's never one.*
My fingers sifted through knots in my black hair as the strands came into focus.
"You can't even listen to me now!" Koharu grabbed my forearms. "I told you what I want. It's the same as you now. Why the hell aren't you happy about that?"
"Because you're lying to yourself!" I broke her grip and stared her down.
My face was tense but had yet to become wet. "Say you want to stay here where you aren't locked up anymore. I'll leave you here to live your dream if that's what you want. All you have to do," I yelled with a cracked voice, "is tell me, and you can have anything you want."
*No easier, no harder.*
Roslynn peered over at Aries, who raised an eyebrow back at her. Their judgment was palpable from across the lobby.
Koharu pushed my chest. Her expression was something heartbreaking—one of forced stoicism.
"I already said I choose you over some dumb fantasy of mine! Handcuff me to the throne in that damn castle for all I care! I'm doomed to stay there all my life regardless! I have no idea if Akiyoshi even wants to run the place."
"Fine! If that's what you want, then we'll go on!" With watery eyes that didn't manifest into tears, I turned away from her.
I threw my hands into the air like some enraged impresario. "Hear that, everyone? The show is still happening!"
*If you want to turn this into theatrics, why don't you go all out with it? We have to make it to the exodus, and we're still on the stasimon, baby!*
Something hard hit me on the back before making a clinking noise against the ground as it cracked into shards. My mind snapped back to when I broke the teacup beside Akiyoshi, and I felt an odd sense of home in the memories.
When I swivelled my head around, I expected to be met with droopy green eyes and dark hair, but the sight morphed into one dominated by pink and a black suit.
"You done shouting yet? Got it all out of your system?"
I couldn't bring my mouth to open. There was a tightness in my chest.
"You think yelling gets you anywhere with your girlfriend? Look at her when you calm down." Aries pulled off her sunglasses, folding them into her pocket. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"
*I didn't think Aries could have such a serious demeanor. She seems like a ball of sunshine.*
I spun around to check on Koharu with a slow shake of the head, and she hid her face instantly.
"I told you: I miss my family so much. I miss what we used to be. I don't want to argue like this." Koharu's words were shaky and unsure, muted by the layer of fabric over her mouth.
In such a short time, the things—the feelings—that had long been stacked fell apart in a matter of days.
"Face me, Koko."
Nothing.
"Koko."
As the rest of the room watched, I wrapped my arms around her. I couldn't hear her cry, so I took that as something of a positive sign. She remained motionless for a few seconds before the slow motion of her arms brought her hands to grip my forearms softly.
"Let's go home, Lia. My dreams aren't so fun anymore if this is the price of them."
I pressed a light kiss to the back of her neck. I wasn't even sure if I followed my brain correctly anymore, but there was no better logic than catering to her.
"Then, we'll do that. We'll do our best here to return."
I imagined she squeezed her eyelids shut as she shook her head with an exhale that released all the tension from her body into the air.
"Thank you, Lia."
"Right, right." Aries clapped her hands with haste. "We don't have much time before we'll just have to lock the two of you up again. The court system is shit if you go back."
*I don't want to get yelled at by some man with a counterfeit hammer.*
Koharu and I nodded gently as we assumed our positions in the circle once more, feeling light fingertips brush against each other as we moved. A smile framed my mouth, and I had some sense of connection once more.
Talking it out. That was always good advice.
Aries picked at her ear as she selected a few rocks from the pile that was now floating like asteroids in the air. Roslynn talked in her place.
"Now that that's over… Aries has told me before the magic is super quick, so we can get this over fast if you stay still."
The fairy held up a finger. "I *did* say that."
I knew what word was coming from her.
"*But* that's only when I use it on myself."
"Oh," Roslynn replied in a lifeless voice.
King Dakota complained, "We've already wasted twenty minutes on arguments. Just do it. Nothing is gonna work if you keep debating like a professor on tenure."
Aries opened her mouth wide. "King Dakota… said something interesting?"
After a threatening fist was directed towards her, she grinned and muttered, "Very well."
She used her hand and a bit of magic to place the stones around our feet in an ellipse. "We'll try this. King and Princess, just stand there so that I can feed off the magic if I need it."
Roslynn nodded, but King Dakota assumed his position without any other acknowledgement.
Raising her right hand in the air, Aries chanted something in another language.
*So this is the endpoint of all that walking, all that hardship…*
It all felt somehow empty as if that sense of adventure became my life force over the past week or so. There were no more stakes—only the mundanity of my typical days rearing its ugly head towards me.
The only thing worse than having to work too hard to live was to work too hard for nothing. In that sense, Koharu's point of view was correct, but exchanging our uncertainty for security and family was critical.
My heart told me to continue frolicking in flowery fields while lacing fingers with her, but my better sense of judgment—the predominant force in my mind that prioritized the thoughts of others over my own—told me to push forward. It wanted me to keep stepping and stepping until my soles were raw and keep going until only infections and injuries could halt my fiery path.