(Sinclair)
***
"I was right when I told Algor that few leaders are truly great," Leo whispered over the rim of his glass.
"Hm? You said that to him?"
"Yes, on the day he arrived, he complimented Inei, and I said he was only different on the surface. He's as superficial as any other leader and only cares about his image. The only things he ever did good benefitted himself, while any other effects were just excesses to him."
"I can't argue much with that," I replied.
Leo was quite smart when it came to people.
"He did do one good thing, though, and I think I'll give him credit where it's due."
"And that would be…?" The contradictory nature of his statement caught me off guard.
"He was right to have gotten you away from Algor. He didn't treat you as a partner should," Leo said casually, drinking his water.
I told him back, "I never thought of that."
***
After I exiled Algor, I neglected to take precautions to protect myself. It was obvious I was the only fairy in the local grouping of kingdoms who could do that to him, so that made me an instant target.
I really should have seen it coming when he abducted me during one of my deliveries and blindfolded me. He took me someplace along the border and tied me to a chair with ropes. While there in the dark, gray space, he told me something I could not remember as he ripped my wings from my back. There was no comparable pain to that one; I still lacked the words with which to describe the excruciating tearing sensation that rippled through my body as he gruesomely removed the appendages.
He then let me go like a useless pet, and I felt the wings for weeks—where they should have been and what they would have allowed me to do. There was something in the field of dentistry called "phantom teeth", and that phenomenon accurately described my confusion and pain then.
It was during this time I built the chariot and acquired the horses. I didn't see Algor for years until just a few days ago when his time for exile was exhausted.
***
My breathing grew heavy as I reminisced about the more unpleasant memories of the past century.
"That's… everything. I have nothing else to hide from you now."
Leo was deep in thought. He calmed down significantly from the time I began my story until then, anger directing itself towards everyone I mentioned in my tales rather than myself. He leaned forward.
"This might seem obvious to you now, but did it ever occur to you that Algor was the one giving you the nightmares?"
I raised my eyebrows, surprised he pieced that together.
"I knew the moment he arrived back here that he was the one causing them," I deadpanned.
"Why didn't you tell me then?" He crossed his arms with a disgruntled expression. "I wouldn't have been so friendly with him if I knew."
"Because I knew he could help. Because I knew you admired him by the way you eyed him. I have no right to take that away from someone," I said, a bit distraught.
"I don't care," he protested. "I wasn't ever as close to him as you think. He's like… a give or take kind of person in my life."
He snorted. "Not even that high on my list after he started being an asshole."
"And I'm not?"
With a gulp that disturbed the rhythm of his sentences, he responded, "No, you're not. You're very im—"
Swiftly shutting his mouth, he dropped the topic. "Anyway, I can't believe someone would treat you the way Algor did."
"I wasn't the nicest to him," I replied as I suppressed a smile from his previous comments, swirling the few sips of wine left in my glass.
"What he did to you went far beyond that."
I wouldn't deny that—I thought—because I knew that was the case. I did him wrong—betrayed him—but he harmed me greatly in comparison. I did not wish to admit that to myself, though. I still wanted to see him as that cheery man I fell in love with and not the grinning menace he became.
I kicked the dirt with my winged boots as Leo gripped my shoulder, knowing it best to remain silent then. Even then, I didn't want to admit Algor changed, and I wanted to hold onto the vivid memories of the past.
What need was there for me to focus on long nights of unspoken physical exchanges when I could think about leaning on Algor's shoulder and watching the sun descend along its path? Why would I want to see the ropes and blindfold when I could fixate myself on the genuine smiles he brought to my face when we were together?
But Algor wasn't the man who I was in love with now.
That was instead Leo—the one who pulled me up from that darkness.
He made me see that there was more to being with a person than what they could get out of me. He made me see I could be my own person and not a servant. I knew there was a light behind his smile instead of grim and cruel intentions for me.
Sure, we weren't copies of each other—as I always thought Algor was—but we were fundamentally alike in enough ways to understand each other and fundamentally different in enough ways to stay our own people. I supposed that was more valuable than whatever twisted notion of love I drilled into my head before.
I glanced up at Leo, who had a soft expression on his face. Regarding his previous statement, I nodded to him, and he took that as a safe signal to continue talking.
"Do you think you can sleep now?"
I shook my head. "No. As long as he's still here, I won't be able to."
"Then, lay here again with me." He patted his flower bed. "We can just talk. I know you're exhausted from today, and I'm sorry we didn't succeed for Inei and Hikaru, even after what I know now." He waved his head around, letting the strands of his hair flail about. "Those poor kids don't deserve it."
Nodding, I realized it was rude of me to talk badly about a man who had a missing daughter.
"We tried our best. It didn't work out. There's little else we can do," I said dryly to mask the flurry of emotions seeking to create a waterfall on my face.
I tilted my head back to swallow the last bit of wine in my glass and placed it on the ground. Then, I stood up and plopped down next to Leo in his bed. It wasn't as large as the king's, but it didn't have to be.
I was content remaining like that and even more so when Leo shifted over. Swinging an arm under my back and another across my waist, he turned on his side. He placed his head on my chest and nuzzled it gently.
Feeling uncomfortable with that part of my body being touched, I raised his head so that it rested somewhere ambiguously between my shoulder and its previous spot. He hardly resisted, and I smiled above him as he settled into place.
I let him embrace me in that warmth, thinking for once that maybe, just maybe I deserved that sort of kindness from someone as he enveloped me in his succulent sweetness. It was tempting, and I wasn't sure if the tipsy feeling from the alcohol exacerbated my senses as I reacted to his smallest motions. They stirred goosebumps on my skin until the tingling in my body made me alight in joy while he innocently rubbed against me, but the shifting also stirred a fond feeling in my heart that became addicting.
"You don't have to worry. It's certainly not your fault."
He huffed. "It sounds a little more convincing coming from you than it does from Akiyoshi for some reason."
"Oh?"
To avoid elaborating, he shifted his focus once more.
"I hope this doesn't bother you," he said, referring to how he laid. "I could not stop crying earlier, and only a warm hug helps. If it makes you uncomfortable—I noticed you moved me upwards—I can scoot over."
I wrapped my arms around his torso. "Shh. It's no bother to me. Get some rest."
He whined, "I said I wanted to talk."
"About anything?"
*About us?*
Pink came over my eyes. I hoped he could not tell its exact meaning. Not yet.
"You know, go for it. Start with whatever," I instead continued, back to my aloof manner.
He looked up into my eyes so earnestly that I could not stop my heart from racing, regardless of the content of whatever he said next.
"Why do you think the sun shines brightly when it can incinerate you heartlessly, and the moon shines dimly when it's far more hospitable and friendly?"
My irises went gray, and I wanted to sigh and laugh at the same time.
*Why the hell do you always ask about shit like the stars when we're together? Isn't there anything else you want to know?*