(Ophelia)
***
Steadfast, I sprinted along a single route with no omnidirectional steps to alter my course. Even the plants took note as they seemed to bend away from my path before I plowed over them. Going deeper into the shrubbery, I longed for some space. I was foolish to dismiss Jisoo when I was warned before.
As I trudged, something warm and wet had the displeasure of painting my face in the ugliest tint. On my lips, it tasted vaguely salty, and I thought it was poison.
Tears. I hadn't bawled in years. It took a tragedy like the death of a grandparent to bring me near the brink of mild crying, and only unspeakable things—none of which I ever experienced—could drag me down to where I sobbed and fell apart. Like anyone, I had my good and bad days, but crying was some circle of hell I rarely visited.
*To think you'd slingshot me between two ends of the emotional spectrum. Did you get to have your fun?*
But Koharu hurt me. She lied to my face, flirted with vague statements and flattering words. I knew there was something dubious about the way she acted, and I wanted to smack my head for being idiotic enough to not listen to my gut.
Only following my heart, I always made the choice that would hurt us least because I solely sought happiness. I called Koharu the hedonist before, but my inability to confront her about the rougher aspects of our relationship made me look like a caricature of a clown.
And now we were stuck in some foreign land without magic or connections or even food! We only had the clothes on our backs and each other.
Scratch that. We didn't even have each other. I abandoned her quicker than the passing of that airplane. After being so protective and defensive over her faults, I left her to rot in a forest.
How cruel of me.
*How cruel of you.*
She wasn't perfect. Neither was I. I made my dumb mistakes all the time, yet when Koharu made a single, dire one, I ditched her. It was as if I dumped all the straws from the bucket to fabricate an escape for myself in which I would not be held accountable as she pulled the last rod.
I acknowledged the fact that—in most arguments—there was some degree of nuance. It wasn't either person's fault exclusively for anything that went wrong. The responsibility was attributed to both sides. A domino couldn't fall without an impetus at the beginning; discourse couldn't start without many mistakes.
Because I was vividly aware of that, I acted out of character. Instead of being the spiteful, stubborn girl of my adolescence, I turned around, red-faced and all. I spun, and I dashed back to the clearing where I abandoned Koharu—my love.
I ran while droplets fell behind me like I was a cloud pouring my emotions onto the earth. The autumn leaves crinkled and cracked under my feet. Their sharp edges hurt; I had no shoes since I took them off to sleep. The weather was chilly, making my tears feel like shards of ice when they layered on my cheeks.
But I continued forward.
Alas, I found the clearing—characterized by sparse flowers and a circle of dirt in the center—and I let out a relieved sigh, which didn't last long.
Koharu wasn't there.
Koharu was lost.
*Where the fuck did she go?*
Letting the knives of guilt mutilate my heart, I wanted to break down right there.
"Crap!" I wailed to the sky.
Like a bat at twilight, I shrieked, "I'm so sorry Koharu."
I let the winds swirl around my hair and whip it into a frenzy. The tornado ravaged my body as I shook, darting my eyes everywhere they could focus for more than a few milliseconds. My face then twisted until it laced into a tight knot.
Weak and anguished, I fell to my knees, noticing some strange divots in the ground as my shins came in contact with them. Letting my vision become unblurred before I scooted over, I dragged my hand weakly over the markings.
***
"On the slim chance you come back—though you need not with my poor behavior earlier—head up from this note and catch up to me. There is no time to be wasted.
-Koharu"