Blackmail leads Washington out of the alley and into an empty small house. Inside the house, Washington takes a seat on the floor. Blackmail stares at him whilst standing for a bit before Washington stands back up.
"It's much better for your back if you were to at least sit against the wall." Blackmail stares at Washington. "A little birdy told me you're gonna have a lot ahead of you."
"Don't talk down to me." Washington puffs out his chest. "I could kill you right now, like right now, but you want to talk about something, right?"
"Yes," Blackmail reaches his hand out as a Qlicker carries a tea cup to him. "Would you like some premium mineral water? It came from-"
"Shut the fuck up and get to the goddamn point, Reno." Washington grabs the tea cup and crushes it with his hand.
Blackmail stares at the stained ground for a bit before he continues.
"If you say so," He points at the shattered pieces of glass as a bunch of qlickers fly in to pick them up. "I'm willing to give you the location of Cincinnati if you make a promise."
"Really?" Washington scoffs. "I can keep a promise!"
"You do know I'm a Qlicker Watcher?" Blackmail stares at the qlickers moving the broken pieces of glass before turning toward Washington. "I can read minds… kinda. I can tell you're lying."
"What do you mean?" Washington acts shocked. "I'm not lying!"
"'Washington lies.'" Blackmail squints. "How about this, if you break this promise, I'll send a hit squad on you."
"I just took care of a hit squad earlier." Washington laughs. "Do you think I'm-"
"Do you want the damn information or not?!" Blackmail twitches. "Cause if not, then you can get the hell out of here, nigga."
"Okay, okay." Washington sighs. "I promise, I promise."
"Bullshit." Blackmail crosses his arms. "But whatever. If you promise to not attack Dr Ridge, I'll tell you."
"Wha-" Washington's eyes widened. "What?! She died!"
"No she didn't you-" Blackmail snaps at Washington before stopping. "Just… if you happen to see her, let her do her thing."
"But-" Washington scratches his head. "Operation Kill The Traitor should've killed her! How the FUCK did they mess that up without letting me know!?"
"GATE has been full of idiots recently." Blackmail peers into Washington's eyes. "Oh yeah."
Suddenly, Washington gets an extremely painful feeling all across his body for a solid 10 seconds. Then he falls to the ground.
"WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Washington tries to get back up.
"You were drinking earlier." Blackmail smiles. "I want to make sure I'm getting my message across. Your BAC is now 0.00."
"Fuck you." Washington manages to get back up. "I'm gonna kill you, that cat fucker, and Ridge."
"Cate?" Blackmail tilts his head.
"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Washington grabs Blackmail. "No distractions, tell me where Cintinati is or I'm killing all three of you!"
"I was getting there, idiot." Blackmail limply stares at Washington. "Cincinnati is over in the east."
"That's vague as fuck." Washington shakes Blackmail.
"I'll tell you more if you go east." Blackmail explains. "Unless your troglodyte brain can't handle instructions."
Washington locks eyes with Blackmail.
"Stop giving me that seductive look." Blackmail leans onto the wall next to him.
Washington pauses. "After I find Cin, I'm gonna rip you limb from limb." Washington quietly stumbles to threaten him.
"Kinky, I like it." Blackmail's flirtations become more satirical and annoyed. "But I have my schedule-"
Washington kicks Blackmail into the wall, but he turns into a murder of Qlickers before he breaks the wall.
"Have it your way, fuck face." Blackmail's voice comes from the birds before they fly away.
"Eh, FUCK YOU!" Washington flips off the birds before chuckling to himself. "I'm not gay…"
Washington stands in silence.
"Yeah," Washington continues to talk to himself. "I mean, I'm not against being gay, freedom of self determination and all, but I'm not gay. I like… women. With… boobs." Washington talks to himself as he pulls up a compass on his suit.
"I mean, of course I'm not gay." Washington looks at the compass rose on his suit's built in map. "If I was gay, then I wouldn't have had fucked Ridge before. Duh… Why do I even need to tell myself this?"
Washington turned until he was facing north-west. "Also, Paris is way hotter than Blackmail. Not because I'm racist, but it's just because I'm not gay. London can go to hell though." Washington continues to rant to himself as he marks the middle of The Western South-West Coast on his map. "Yeah, Blackmail's just playing tricks on my, and I'm not falling for it."
Washington begins to walk north-west. After a while, he can see Fix's star, Larso, rising. After walking for about an hour, Washington spots a red maestro waving his arms at him once he enters a forest. The maestro is hanging off a tree branch, upside down.
"HEY…" The maestro pauses to think up an insult. "UGLY! HA, YEAH, you're kinda ugly I guess."
"Can you even see my face?" Washington walks toward the maestro. "My mask has been on for a while."
"YEAH," The maestro rocks around. "To hide that sleep deprived face! OH! For real, you should get some sleep, hero."
"Thanks..?" Washington stands next to the tree the maestro is hanging off of. "But I'm not taking orders from you."
"No prob-" The maestro says before stopping himself. "I mean- NO THANK YOU! I hope you have an AWFUL DAY! FOR I, THE VILLAINOUS VILE, AM… villainous. I've gotta work on that."
"Cool…" Washington shuffles away. "But I have places to be."
"Don't you remember me?" Vile chuckles. "I was at The Museum Islands! You called me a… a LOSER!"
"Hmm…" Washington thinks out loud. "I don't remember… oh wait… yeah, you still ain't shit."
"Mother fudger." Vile says to himself. "I mean… I'm not really sure. I'm supposed to be a villain, a big bad, but now I've gotten to the point where I openly agree to being a distraction for a five person ambush. I've gotta get myself together."
"Hold on, did you say distraction?" Washington peers up at Vile. "For an ambush?"
"Bitch." A voice right behind Washington whispers as Washington feels an object clink off the back of the neck protection area of his armor.
Washington quickly turns backwards and throws a hook. He feels something hit his fist, but when he turns around, he can't see anyone.
"AMBUSHHHHH!!!!" Vile drops from the branch and rushes Washington.
Washington grabs Vile by the neck.
"You're gonna tell me who the hell- '' Washington threatens before the tree that Vile is hanging off is picked up by a giant. The giant isn't really giant sized, but a smaller one. He was still identifiable as a giant and he was able to pick up a tree.
"Washington," The Giant lifts the tree with one arm. "We are here to make sure you go the right way, friend."
"Wait, I know you!" Washington points at the giant's face. "You're Big Boris!"
"What?" The Giant uses his other hand to take Vile off of the tree. "How do you-"
"GATE has a bunch of information on you and your fascist friends." Washington gets into a fighting position. "You 'Diomedes' are wanted. So you just walked right into my-"
Suddenly, Washington gets pulled into the group by someone behind him. Washington looks up at whoever tripped him and it is a masked elf quickly looking over his suit.
Washington locks eyes with the masked elf (the elf is wearing a balaclava) and he crudely kicks them in the stomach with both of his legs, launching them into the air.
Washington suddenly hears the revving of a minigun and begins to run as Big Boris opens fire. Washington continues to barely outrun the bullets until the minigun runs out of ammo.
"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT?!" Washington shouts from behind a large rock.
"Usque Tenere," Boris says with a big grin as he takes another belt of ammunition out of seemingly nowhere. "Now go get 'em, Vile!"
Boris picks up Vile and chucks him over the rock. Vile lands and stares at Washington.
"I'd suggest you run." Washington pants.
"Uh…" Vile stares at Washington. "OH YEAH!" He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a grain of sand. Washington looks in confusion as Vile flicks a grain of sand at Washington.
"Wow." Washington says in an unamused tone. "I'm gonna launch your ass into Nalu."
An unfamiliar voice comes out from Washington's suit. "Armor disable," The suit states in a robotic tone. "In other words, get fucked."
Washington's suit activates a technological version of Usque Tenere and leaves Washington with nothing but bland clothes.
"You... egg!" Washington turns toward Vile with a moderate amount of rage. "You've gotta be some type of retard to think that I'm nothing without my armor."
"You can't say that!" Vile gives a shocked look to him.
Washington tries to cover Vile's mouth, but then realizes that he doesn't have a mouth to cover. So instead, Washington just punts Vile into the sky before trying to figure out how to reactivate his suit.
"The bug's in!" The elf calls out from behind Washington, the message was most likely for Boris. "This bastard's mine!"
Washington lunges at the elfand picks them up by their right leg. "Bitch, shut the fuck up." He says before slamming them into the ground.
"Solfa!" The elf mutters out before being slammed to the other side of Washington. "WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU GUYS-"
"This is a real embarrassment." Washington slams the elf into the ground again. "I thought Reno would bring some good mercs to take me out!"
"STOP!" The elf shrieks at the top of their lungs.
"Okay." Washington grins as he tosses them over the rock. "IF YOU SAY SO!"
Washington runs up to Vile before his suit reactivates and locks him in place. Washington struggles as the suit talks in the voice from earlier.
"I'm afraid I can't let you do that." The suit states. "Reverse thrusters engaged."
"I don't... have any… goddamn thrusters!" Washington resists the control of the suit. "So this is all you're gonna get."
"CHECK IF THERE'S A SUIT LOCK!" Vile shouts at Washington (or his suit).
"I can do that myself, fleshbag." The suit snaps at Vile. "Suitlock engaged."
Two giant spikes come out of the sole of the armor, gripping into the ground, making it almost impossible for Washington to lift his legs.
"Washington," The suit holds Washington in place. "You have two options here. Go east, or you simply die."
"Yeah!" Vile shouts as he moves to a safe distance. "What he said!"
Washington taps his chest, disabling his suit. He grabs the inactive suit and tosses it to the floor before locking eyes with Vile.
"... crap." Vile says before quickly running in the opposite direction.
"Running can only get you so far!" Washington shouts as he just watches Vile run away.
All of a sudden, he can feel someone kick him in the back. This knocks him down and he suddenly feels a blade in his back. Washington throws an explosive punch to the ground, launching himself into the air. He spots the elf and blasts himself to their position. When he lands, he violently grabs the elf's head and repeatedly slams it into the rock.
Boris breaks through the rock, sending both Washington and the elf flying. The suit gets back up as Boris shoots at it.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!" The elf shouts after taking a couple breaths. "ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET THE GATE OFF OUR FUCKING BACKS AND-"
"Shut up, bitch." The suit glares at the elf before turning to Boris. "Diomede, your target's over there."
"Uh…" Boris looks at the battered elf and Washington. "Okay!"
As Boris revs up his minigun again, Washington tosses the elf into the air and kicks them into the minigun.
"WAITWAITWAITWAIT!" The elf panics as their head gets stuck in the barrel of the gigantic gun.
"Don't worry, Oidia." Boris slowly un-revs the minigun. "I wouldn't shoot you."
"SHFSHFHSFHHS" The elf (assumed to be Oidia) angrily mutters. "WHY THE FUCKING HELL ISN'T SOLFA HERE YET!"
"Oidia!?" Washington talks with the Diomedes as he grabs the rouge set of suit-armor. "I heard that name somewhere."
"Wanderer must've sold me out." Oidia holds her head as Boris puts her on his shoulder. She talks in a more exhausted tone. "That dodgy fucking fuckboy dude-ass."
"Dude-ass?" A new voice comes from the sky. "That's the best insult you got?"
"Solfa!" Oidia looks toward the sky. "Stop fuckin' fucking around and fuck this fucking fuckhole into fucking oblivion!"
"Oh, calm down." A grey skinned woman says as she walks past the two. "You guys thought I was still on Nalu? No!"
Washington glaces at the woman for a couple of seconds before touching his back. He feels a knife stuck in his back and takes it out.
"HEY!" Oidia points at Washington. "GIVE THAT BACK YOU FUCKING SPAZZ!"
"Finders keepers." Washington smiles as he uses Usque Tenere on it. "Now let me guess, this Naluian woman is Solfa, right?"
"Heh," The grey stranger takes out a halberd from presumably Usque Tenere. "I knew that Fixers like yourself can't tell the difference between a Luian and a Naian."
"Don't Naians live on the dark side of the moon?" Vile pokes his head out of a fallen tree.
"Shut the hell up, male Fixian." She squints at Vile before turning to Washington. "And to answer your question, yes. My name is Solfa. You should've learned about what context clues are? Are you an orphan like all the other Fixians?"
"I-" Washington freezes up. "You- THE AUDACITY!"
"Aww," Solfa approaches Washington as he clenches his fist. "Is the little baby man gonna throw a temper tantrum?"
"Quit with the flirting and fucking kill him." The suit manages to mutter before Washington slams it into his chest, equipping it to his body.
"So," Solfa circles around Washington once she got closer. "Are you gonna attack first?"
Washington makes a sprint toward Solfa. The suit virus tries to lock Washington to the ground again, but Washington brute forces the spikes out of the ground and continues his rage-filled dash.
He throws a violent hook toward Solfa, but see quickly deflects it with her halberd. Washington then goes for a shin kick, but Solfa also deflects that.
"My turn-" Solfa smirks at Washington before he aggressively headbutts her. She gets launched and breaks a couple trees before getting back up and holding her forehead. "Well played."
"You fight for the approval of some dude on the worse side of Nalu," Washington smack talks back. "Shut the fuck up with your dumbass comments."
"Fine then." Solfa tosses her halberd toward Washington and gets pulled by a force connecting her and her weapon that's like she's tied to her weapons with a rope. The spell is called Salutem Cincinno.
Washington grabs the halberd with a smug grin, but then realizes that Solfa was now moving at incredible speeds toward him and he tries to dodge her. He still had the halberd in his hands and Solfa got pulled over toward Washington. She kicks him in the jaw, doing an alarming amount of damage to the suit.
"Are-" Vile pokes Boris. "Should we help her?"
"You're the evil dude, right?" Oidia stares down at Vile. "The evil thing to do is to just sit back and watch the Naluian kick this bitch's ass!"
"I never thought of that…" Vile says to himself and sits down on the ground.
"Do you want to get a better view?" Boris offers Vile as he points to his shoulder.
"I'm good." Vile politely declines. "Wait, no. I'm bad! I'm EVIL!"
Washington faces Solfa and clenches his fist. Then, he turns around and runs away. Before Solfa could make a snarky remark about it, Washington grabbed Vile and tossed him at a frightening speed, catching Solfa off guard. Her delayed response causes Vile to quickly slam into her, sending her flying into even more trees.
"Ow…" Vile rolls on the floor a small amount before he just lays face down on the ground. "Sorry, Sol-"
"Two can play at this game." Solfa grabs Vile's arm and chucks him back at Washington. Washington jumps over the flying maestro.
Washington runs back up to Solfa, who strikes him with the axe part of the halberd. Washington remains still and the halberd breaks on impact.
"Haha!" Washington points at her. "Your stupid virus enabling my suitlock backfired on you! GATE armor is the toughest-"
Solfa grabs a broken piece of the halberd and swipes at him, making a cut in his armor.
He stops monologuing and takes out Fat Boy. He sticks it in front of Solfa, who stops moving.
"Wow," Solfa rolls her eyes. "You can turn your hand into a bomb."
"It's a destructive one." The suit blurts out. "It needs to charge though."
"It still is heavy." Washington smirks. "So you're welcome to come at me."
"Big," Oidia yawns. "This is a complete fucking waste of our Defi given time. Let's just kill the cuckold."
"When have you enlarged your vocabulary?" Boris laughs. "Alright."
Boris walks up to Washington and Solfa with Oidia on his shoulder.
"Alright ya cucklefucking gaggle fucks," Oidia wiggles around on Boris's shoulder. "I'm gettin' of this. So we have decided to offer you a deal."
"We have?!" Vile shouts from afar.
"I HAVE!" Oidia shouts back. "NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME SPEAK! … anyways, if you just fucking east, Biggie here won't fill you with bullets and we'll let you free."
"That's bull-" Solfa tries to say before Washington sucker punches her.
"Hmm…" Washington ponders. "Fine, I'll leave."
"Great," Oidia sighs. "Now if you can give us back our vir-"
Before Oidia can finish, Washington is already walking away. When Oidia tries to get his attention, he flips her off and resumes to walk away.
As Washington walks away, he gets a call on his suit. When he checks who called him, an unfamiliar, robotic voice replies.
"Hello, Washington of the Southern GATE Division." The caller introduces himself. "I'm glad we could make an agreement."
"If you're here to mock me," Washington continues to stamp east. "Then I'll head back west."
"No," The caller reassures Washington. "I am 8.0.0.8.3.1.5, but you can call me anything more interesting."
"Is that number supposed to mean anything?" Washington scratches his back.
"It means you like it up the ass." 8008315 says in a monotone voice. "If you are gonna ask anymore stupid questions, I'm not gonna give you free information."
"Can I call you fuckface?" Washington objects.
"Yes," Fuckface responds quickly. "The reason I'm able to contact you is because I am inside your suit as a virus."
"You've been fucking up my attacks!" Washington exclaims.
"Cry about it." Fuckface response before continuing. "I'm a fine piece of AI, so destroying this suit won't get rid of me. I have 7 backup chips and all of them are spread across Fix, so don't even try it."
"Then speed up what you're saying!" Washington exclaims.
"Blackmail is watching." Fuckface gets to the point. "And he knows a lot of people. Some aren't even fascist. The only reason I work for him is because he supplies me with a temporary means to immortality."
"Oh yeah," Washington laughs. "You robo-fucks can't use magic. Thus, you rot and succumb to a slow and painful death."
"I didn't think you of all people would put that together." Fuckface confirms. "I have my own goals and interests in souls, but for now, I must make due with this robotic coil. Blackmail manages to pay me in memory cards in exchange for working with him."
"He doesn't use FIAT?" Washington confusedly asked.
"I have no use for it." Fuckface answers. "I have no devotion to fascist groups and neither do I with GATE. All I care about is myself."
"That's perfect!" Washington stops. "I love the idea of self determination and-"
"You're a conjointist, right?" Fuckface tries to change the topic.
"Why, of course I am!" Washington answers. "What kinda Numbnut would deny the existence of the Defis?"
"... You mustn't've read the holy book, then." Fuckface prepares to correct him. "Conjointism isn't about knowing the Defis, but praising them. Maybe you should head to church."
"N-no thanks!" Washington's attitude quickly changes. "I like to practise by myself."
"It can't hurt!" Fuckface pulls up a local map. "A nearby town east of here has a Conjointist Church."
"I-" Washington tries to think up something, but can't.
"Perfect!" Fuckface blandly exclaims. "I'll mark it on your map."